第5章

Isupposeyouhavehadaslittletovexyousinceyoucameintothishouseasanycreatureintheworld。“

“IhopeIamnotungrateful，aunt，“saidFannymodestly。

“No，mydear；Ihopenot。Ihavealwaysfoundyouaverygoodgirl。“

“AndamInevertolivehereagain？“

“Never，mydear；butyouaresureofacomfortablehome。

Itcanmakeverylittledifferencetoyou，whetheryouareinonehouseortheother。“

Fannylefttheroomwithaverysorrowfulheart；shecouldnotfeelthedifferencetobesosmall，shecouldnotthinkoflivingwithherauntwithanythinglikesatisfaction。

AssoonasshemetwithEdmundshetoldhimherdistress。

“Cousin，“saidshe，“somethingisgoingtohappenwhichI

donotlikeatall；andthoughyouhaveoftenpersuadedmeintobeingreconciledtothingsthatIdislikedatfirst，youwillnotbeabletodoitnow。IamgoingtoliveentirelywithmyauntNorris。“

“Indeed!“

“Yes；myauntBertramhasjusttoldmeso。Itisquitesettled。

IamtoleaveMansfieldPark，andgototheWhiteHouse，Isuppose，assoonassheisremovedthere。“

“Well，Fanny，andiftheplanwerenotunpleasanttoyou，Ishouldcallitanexcellentone。“

“Oh，cousin!“

“Ithaseverythingelseinitsfavour。Myauntisactinglikeasensiblewomaninwishingforyou。Sheischoosingafriendandcompanionexactlywheresheought，andIamgladherloveofmoneydoesnotinterfere。

Youwillbewhatyououghttobetoher。Ihopeitdoesnotdistressyouverymuch，Fanny？“

“Indeeditdoes：Icannotlikeit。Ilovethishouseandeverythinginit：Ishalllovenothingthere。

YouknowhowuncomfortableIfeelwithher。“

“Icansaynothingforhermannertoyouasachild；

butitwasthesamewithusall，ornearlyso。Sheneverknewhowtobepleasanttochildren。Butyouarenowofanagetobetreatedbetter；Ithinksheisbehavingbetteralready；andwhenyouareheronlycompanion，you_must_beimportanttoher。“

“Icanneverbeimportanttoanyone。“

“Whatistopreventyou？“

“Everything。Mysituation，myfoolishnessandawkwardness。“

“Astoyourfoolishnessandawkwardness，mydearFanny，believeme，youneverhaveashadowofeither，butinusingthewordssoimproperly。Thereisnoreasonintheworldwhyyoushouldnotbeimportantwhereyouareknown。

Youhavegoodsense，andasweettemper，andIamsureyouhaveagratefulheart，thatcouldneverreceivekindnesswithoutwishingtoreturnit。Idonotknowanybetterqualificationsforafriendandcompanion。“

“Youaretookind，“saidFanny，colouringatsuchpraise；

“howshallIeverthankyouasIought，forthinkingsowellofme。Oh!cousin，ifIamtogoaway，Ishallrememberyourgoodnesstothelastmomentofmylife。“

“Why，indeed，Fanny，IshouldhopetoberememberedatsuchadistanceastheWhiteHouse。Youspeakasifyouweregoingtwohundredmilesoffinsteadofonlyacrossthepark；butyouwillbelongtousalmostasmuchasever。

Thetwofamilieswillbemeetingeverydayintheyear。

Theonlydifferencewillbethat，livingwithyouraunt，youwillnecessarilybebroughtforwardasyououghttobe。

Heretherearetoomanywhomyoucanhidebehind；butwithheryouwillbeforcedtospeakforyourself。“

“Oh!Idonotsayso。“

“Imustsayit，andsayitwithpleasure。Mrs。Norrisismuchbetterfittedthanmymotherforhavingthechargeofyounow。Sheisofatempertodoagreatdealforanybodyshereallyinterestsherselfabout，andshewillforceyoutodojusticetoyournaturalpowers。“

Fannysighed，andsaid，“Icannotseethingsasyoudo；

butIoughttobelieveyoutoberightratherthanmyself，andIamverymuchobligedtoyoufortryingtoreconcilemetowhatmustbe。IfIcouldsupposemyauntreallytocareforme，itwouldbedelightfultofeelmyselfofconsequencetoanybody。_Here_，Iknow，Iamofnone，andyetIlovetheplacesowell。“

“Theplace，Fanny，iswhatyouwillnotquit，thoughyouquitthehouse。Youwillhaveasfreeacommandoftheparkandgardensasever。Even_your_constantlittleheartneednottakefrightatsuchanominalchange。

Youwillhavethesamewalkstofrequent，thesamelibrarytochoosefrom，thesamepeopletolookat，thesamehorsetoride。“

“Verytrue。Yes，dearoldgreypony!Ah!cousin，whenI

rememberhowmuchIusedtodreadriding，whatterrorsitgavemetohearittalkedofaslikelytodomegood(oh!howIhavetrembledatmyuncle’sopeninghislipsifhorsesweretalkedof)，andthenthinkofthekindpainsyoutooktoreasonandpersuademeoutofmyfears，andconvincemethatIshouldlikeitafteralittlewhile，andfeelhowrightyouprovedtobe，Iaminclinedtohopeyoumayalwaysprophesyaswell。“

“AndIamquiteconvincedthatyourbeingwithMrs。Norriswillbeasgoodforyourmindasridinghasbeenforyourhealth，andasmuchforyourultimatehappinesstoo。“

Soendedtheirdiscourse，which，foranyveryappropriateserviceitcouldrenderFanny，mightaswellhavebeenspared，forMrs。Norrishadnotthesmallestintentionoftakingher。

Ithadneveroccurredtoher，onthepresentoccasion，butasathingtobecarefullyavoided。Topreventitsbeingexpected，shehadfixedonthesmallesthabitationwhichcouldrankasgenteelamongthebuildingsofMansfieldparish，theWhiteHousebeingonlyjustlargeenoughtoreceiveherselfandherservants，andallowaspareroomforafriend，ofwhichshemadeaveryparticularpoint。

ThespareroomsattheParsonagehadneverbeenwanted，buttheabsolutenecessityofaspareroomforafriendwasnowneverforgotten。Notallherprecautions，however，couldsaveherfrombeingsuspectedofsomethingbetter；

or，perhaps，herverydisplayoftheimportanceofaspareroommighthavemisledSirThomastosupposeitreallyintendedforFanny。LadyBertramsoonbroughtthemattertoacertaintybycarelesslyobservingtoMrs。Norris——

“Ithink，sister，weneednotkeepMissLeeanylonger，whenFannygoestolivewithyou。“

Mrs。Norrisalmoststarted。“Livewithme，dearLadyBertram!whatdoyoumean？“

“Isshenottolivewithyou？IthoughtyouhadsettleditwithSirThomas。“

“Me!never。IneverspokeasyllableaboutittoSirThomas，norhetome。Fannylivewithme!thelastthingintheworldformetothinkof，orforanybodytowishthatreallyknowsusboth。Goodheaven!whatcouldIdowithFanny？

Me!apoor，helpless，forlornwidow，unfitforanything，myspiritsquitebrokedown；whatcouldIdowithagirlathertimeoflife？Agirloffifteen!theveryageofallotherstoneedmostattentionandcare，andputthecheerfullestspiritstothetest!SureSirThomascouldnotseriouslyexpectsuchathing!SirThomasistoomuchmyfriend。Nobodythatwishesmewell，Iamsure，wouldproposeit。HowcameSirThomastospeaktoyouaboutit？“

“Indeed，Idonotknow。Isupposehethoughtitbest。“

“Butwhatdidhesay？Hecouldnotsayhe_wished_metotakeFanny。Iamsureinhishearthecouldnotwishmetodoit。“

“No；heonlysaidhethoughtitverylikely；andIthoughtsotoo。Weboththoughtitwouldbeacomforttoyou。

Butifyoudonotlikeit，thereisnomoretobesaid。

Sheisnoencumbrancehere。“

“Dearsister，ifyouconsidermyunhappystate，howcanshebeanycomforttome？HereamI，apoordesolatewidow，deprivedofthebestofhusbands，myhealthgoneinattendingandnursinghim，myspiritsstillworse，allmypeaceinthisworlddestroyed，withhardlyenoughtosupportmeintherankofagentlewoman，andenablemetolivesoasnottodisgracethememoryofthedeardeparted——

whatpossiblecomfortcouldIhaveintakingsuchachargeuponmeasFanny？IfIcouldwishitformyownsake，Iwouldnotdosounjustathingbythepoorgirl。

Sheisingoodhands，andsureofdoingwell。ImuststrugglethroughmysorrowsanddifficultiesasIcan。“

“Thenyouwillnotmindlivingbyyourselfquitealone？“

“LadyBertram，Idonotcomplain。IknowIcannotliveasIhavedone，butImustretrenchwhereIcan，andlearntobeabettermanager。I_have__been_

aliberalhousekeeperenough，butIshallnotbeashamedtopractiseeconomynow。Mysituationisasmuchalteredasmyincome。AgreatmanythingswereduefrompoorMr。Norris，asclergymanoftheparish，thatcannotbeexpectedfromme。Itisunknownhowmuchwasconsumedinourkitchenbyoddcomersandgoers。

AttheWhiteHouse，mattersmustbebetterlookedafter。

I_must_livewithinmyincome，orIshallbemiserable；

andIownitwouldgivemegreatsatisfactiontobeabletodorathermore，tolaybyalittleattheendoftheyear。“

“Idaresayyouwill。Youalwaysdo，don’tyou？“

“Myobject，LadyBertram，istobeofusetothosethatcomeafterme。Itisforyourchildren’sgoodthatI

wishtobericher。Ihavenobodyelsetocarefor，butIshouldbeverygladtothinkIcouldleavealittletrifleamongthemworththeirhaving。“

“Youareverygood，butdonottroubleyourselfaboutthem。

Theyaresureofbeingwellprovidedfor。SirThomaswilltakecareofthat。“

“Why，youknow，SirThomas’smeanswillberatherstraitenediftheAntiguaestateistomakesuchpoorreturns。“

“Oh!_that_willsoonbesettled。SirThomashasbeenwritingaboutit，Iknow。“