Letters of Two Brides

第24章

THECOMTESSEDEL’ESTORADETOTHEBARONNEDEMACUMER

January1827。

MyfatherhasbeenelectedtotheChamber,myfather-in-lawisdead,andIamonthepointofmysecondconfinement;thesearethechiefeventsmarkingtheendoftheyearforus。Imentionthematonce,lestthesightoftheblacksealshouldfrightenyou。

Mydear,yourletterfromRomemademyfleshcreep。Youarenothingbutapairofchildren。Felipeiseitheradissemblingdiplomatorelsehisloveforyouistheloveamanmighthaveforacourtesan,onwhomhesquandershisall,knowingallthetimethatsheisfalsetohim。Enoughofthis。YousayIrave,soIhadbetterholdmytongue。

OnlythiswouldIsay,fromthecomparisonofourtwoverydifferentdestiniesIdrawthisharshmoral——Lovenotifyouwouldbeloved。

Mydear,whenLouiswaselectedtotheprovincialCouncil,hereceivedthecrossoftheLegionofHonor。Thatisnownearlythreeyearsago;

andasmyfather——whomyouwillnodoubtseeinParisduringthecourseofthesession——hasaskedtherankofOfficeroftheLegionforhisson-in-law,Iwanttoknowifyouwilldomethekindnesstotakeinhandthebigwig,whoeverhemaybe,towhomthispatronagebelongs,andtokeepaneyeuponthelittleaffair。But,whateveryoudo,don’tgetentangledintheconcernsofmyhonoredfather。TheComtedeMaucombeisfishingforthetitleofMarquisforhimself;butkeepyourgoodservicesforme,please。WhenLouisisadeputy——nextwinterthatis——weshallcometoParis,andthenwewillmoveheavenandearthtogetsomeGovernmentappointmentforhim,sothatwemaybeabletosaveourincomebylivingonhissalary。Myfathersitsbetweenthecentreandtheright;atitlewillcontenthim。OurfamilywasdistinguishedeveninthedaysofKingRene,andCharlesX。willhardlysaynotoaMaucombe;butwhatIfearisthatmyfathermaytakeitintohisheadtoasksomefavorformyyoungerbrother。Now,ifthemarquisateisdangledoutofhisreach,hewillhavenothoughtstosparefromhimself。

January15th。

Ah!Louise,Ihavebeeninhell。IfIcanbeartotellyouofmyanguish,itisbecauseyouareanotherself;evenso,Idon’tknowwhetherIshalleverbeabletoliveagaininthoughtthosefiveghastlydays。Themereword“convulsions“makesmyveryheartsick。

Fivedays!tometheywerefivecenturiesoftorture。Amotherwhohasnotbeenthroughthismartyrdomdoesnotknowwhatsufferingis。SofrenziedwasIthatIevenenviedyou,whoneverhadachild!

Theeveningbeforethatterribledaytheweatherwasclose,almosthot,andIthoughtmylittleArmandwasaffectedbyit。Generallysosweetandcaressing,hewaspeevish,criedfornothing,wantedtoplay,andthenbrokehistoys。Perhapsthissortoffractiousnessistheusualsignofapproachingillnesswithchildren。WhileIwaswonderingaboutit,InoticedArmand’scheeksflush,butthisIsetdowntoteething,forheiscuttingfourlargeteethatonce。SoIputhimtobedbesideme,andkeptconstantlywakingthroughthenight。Hewasalittlefeverish,butnotenoughtomakemeuneasy,mymindbeingstillfulloftheteething。Towardsmorninghecried“Mamma!“andaskedbysignsforsomethingtodrink;butthecrywasspasmodic,andtherewereconvulsivetwitchingsinthelimbs,whichturnedmetoice。

Ijumpedoutofbedtofetchhimadrink。Imaginemyhorrorwhen,onmyhandinghimthecup,heremainedmotionless,onlyrepeating“Mamma!“inthatstrange,unfamiliarvoice,whichwasindeedbythistimehardlyavoiceatall。Itookhishand,butitdidnotrespondtomypressure;itwasquitestiff。Iputthecuptohislips;thepoorlittlefellowgulpeddownthreeorfourmouthfulsinaconvulsivemannerthatwasterribletosee,andthewatermadeastrangesoundinhisthroat。Heclungtomedesperately,andIsawhiseyesroll,asthoughsomehiddenforcewithinwerepullingatthem,tillonlythewhiteswerevisible;hislimbswereturningrigid。Iscreamedaloud,andLouiscame。

“Adoctor!quick!……heisdying,“Icried。

Louisvanished,andmypoorArmandagaingasped,“Mamma!Mamma!“Thenextmomenthelostallconsciousnessofhismother’sexistence。Theprettyveinsonhisforeheadswelled,andtheconvulsionsbegan。Forawholehourbeforethedoctorscame,Iheldinmyarmsthatmerrybaby,allliliesandroses,theblossomofmylife,mypride,andmyjoy,lifelessasapieceofwood;andhiseyes!Icannotthinkofthemwithouthorror。MyprettyArmandwasameremummy——black,shrive

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