第6章

TheminuteIsawitwasgreenIwassorry,andbegantoreflect—

reflectionisthebeginningofreform。Ifyoudon\'treflectwhenyoucommitacrimethenthatcrimeisofnouse;itmightjustaswellhavebeencommittedbysomeoneelse。Youmustreflectorthevalueislost;youarenotvaccinatedagainstcommittingitagain。

Ibegantoreflect。Isaidtomyself:"Whatoughtaboytodowhohasstolenagreenwatermelon？WhatwouldGeorgeWashingtondo,thefatherofhiscountry,theonlyAmericanwhocouldnottellalie？

Whatwouldhedo？Thereisonlyoneright,high,noblethingforanyboytodowhohasstolenawatermelonofthatclass:hemustmakerestitution;hemustrestorethatstolenpropertytoitsrightfulowner。"IsaidIwoulddoitwhenImadethatgoodresolution。I

feltittobeanoble,upliftingobligation。Iroseupspirituallystrongerandrefreshed。Icarriedthatwatermelonback—whatwasleftofit—andrestoredittothefarmer,andmadehimgivemearipeoneinitsplace。

Nowyouseethatthisconstantimpactofcrimeuponcrimeprotectsyouagainstfurthercommissionofcrime。Itbuildsyouup。Amancan\'tbecomemorallyperfectbystealingoneorathousandgreenwatermelons,buteverylittlehelps。

Iwasatagreatschoolyesterday（St。Paul\'s）,whereforfourhundredyearstheyhavebeenbusywithbrains,andbuildingupEnglandbyproducingPepys,Miltons,andMarlboroughs。Sixhundredboyslefttonothingintheworldbuttheoreticalmorality。Iwantedtobecometheprofessorofpracticalmorality,butthehighmasterwasaway,soIsupposeIshallhavetogoonmakingmyliving—thesameoldway—

byaddingpracticaltotheoreticalmorality。

WhataretheglorythatwasGreece,thegrandeurthatwasRome,comparedtothegloryandgrandeurandmajestyofaperfectedmoralitysuchasyouseebeforeyou？

TheNewVagabondsareoldvagabonds（undergoingtheoldsortofreform）。Youdrankmyhealth;IhopeIhavenotbeenunuseful。Takethissystemofmoralitytoyourhearts。Takeithometoyourneighborsandyourgraves,andIhopethatitwillbealongtimebeforeyouarrivethere。

LAYMAN\'SSERMON。

TheYoungMen\'sChristianAssociationaskedMr。ClemenstodeliveralaysermonattheMajesticTheatre,NewYork,March4,1906。Morethanfivethousandyoungmentriedtogetintothetheatre,andinashorttimetrafficwaspracticallystoppedintheadjacentstreets。

Thepolicereserveshadtobecalledouttothinthecrowd。DoctorFagnanihadsaidsomethingbeforeaboutthepoliceepisode,andMr。

Clemenstookitup。

IHAVEbeenlisteningtowhatwassaidhere,andthereisinitalessonofcitizenship。Youcreatedthepolice,andyouareresponsibleforthem。Onemustpause,therefore,beforecriticisingthemtooharshly。Theyarecitizens,justasweare。Alittleofcitizenshipoughttobetaughtatthemother\'skneeandinthenursery。

Citizenshipiswhatmakesarepublic;monarchiescangetalongwithoutit。Whatkeepsarepubliconitslegsisgoodcitizenship。

Organizationisnecessaryinallthings。Itisevennecessaryinreform。Iwasanorganizationmyselfonce—fortwelvehours。IwasinChicagoafewyearsagoabouttodepartforNewYork。TherewerewithmeMr。Osgood,apublisher,andastenographer。Ipickedoutastate—roomonatrain,theprincipalfeatureofwhichwasthatitcontainedtheprivilegeofsmoking。Thetrainhadstartedbutashorttimewhentheconductorcameinandsaidthattherehadbeenamistakemade,andaskedthatwevacatetheapartment。Irefused,butwhenIwentoutontheplatformOsgoodandthestenographeragreedtoacceptasection。Theyweretoomodest。

Now,Iamnotmodest。Iwasbornmodest,butitdidn\'tlast。I

assertedmyself,insisteduponmyrights,andfinallythePullmanconductorandthetrainconductorcapitulated,andIwasleftinpossession。

Iwentintothedining—carthenextmorningforbreakfast。

OrdinarilyIonlycareforcoffeeandrolls,butthisparticularmorningIespiedanimportant—lookingmanontheothersideofthecareatingbroiledchicken。Iaskedforbroiledchicken,andIwastoldbythewaiterandlaterbythedining—carconductorthattherewasnobroiledchicken。Theremusthavebeenanargument,forthePullmanconductorcameinandremarked:"Ifhewantsbroiledchicken,giveittohim。Ifyouhaven\'tgotitonthetrain,stopsomewhere。Itwillbebetterforallconcerned！"Igotthechicken。

Itisfromexperiencessuchasthesethatyougetyoureducationoflife,andyoustringthemintojewelsorintotinware,asyoumaychoose。Ihavereceivedrecentlyseverallettersaskingmycounseloradvice。Theprincipalrequestisforsomeincidentthatmayprovehelpfultotheyoung。Therewerealotofincidentsinmycareertohelpmealong—sometimestheyhelpedmealongfasterthanIwantedtogo。

Hereissucharequest。ItisatelegramfromJoplin,Missouri,anditreads:"Inwhatoneofyourworkscanwefindthedefinitionofagentleman？"

Ihavenotansweredthattelegram,either;Icouldn\'t。Itseemstomethatifanymanhasjustmercifulandkindlyinstinctshewouldbeagentleman,forhewouldneednothingelseintheworld。

Ireceivedtheotherdayaletterfrommyoldfriend,WilliamDeanHowells—Howells,theheadofAmericanliterature。Nooneisabletostandwithhim。Heisanold,oldfriendofmine,andhewritesme,"To—morrowIshallbesixty—nineyearsold。"Why,IamsurprisedatHowellswritingthat！Ihaveknownhimlongerthanthat。I\'msorrytoseeamantryingtoappearsoyoung。Let\'ssee。Howellssaysnow,"IseeyouhavebeenburyingPatrick。Isupposehewasold,too。"

No,hewasneverold—Patrick。Hecametousthirty—sixyearsago。

HewasmycoachmanonthemorningthatIdrovemyyoungbridetoournewhome。HewasayoungIrishman,slender,tall,lithe,honest,truthful,andheneverchangedinallhislife。Hereallywaswithusbuttwenty—fiveyears,forhedidnotgowithustoEurope,butheneverregardedthatasseparation。Asthechildrengrewuphewastheirguide。Hewasallhonor,honesty,andaffection。HewaswithusinNewHampshire,withuslastsummer,andhishairwasjustasblack,hiseyeswerejustasblue,hisformjustasstraight,andhisheartjustasgoodasonthedaywefirstmet。InallthelongyearsPatricknevermadeamistake。Heneverneededanorder,heneverreceivedacommand。Heknew。Ihavebeenaskedformyideaofanidealgentleman,andIgiveittoyou—PatrickMcAleer。

UNIVERSITYSETTLEMENTSOCIETY。

Aftertheseriousaddressesweremade,SethLowintroducedMr。

ClemensattheSettlementHouse,February2,1901。

THEolderwegrowthegreaterbecomesourwonderathowmuchignoranceonecancontainwithoutburstingone\'sclothes。TendaysagoIdidnotknowanythingabouttheUniversitySettlementexceptwhatI\'dreadinthepamphletssentme。Now,afterbeinghereandhearingMrs。HewittandMrs。Thomas,itseemstomeIknowofnothinglikeitatall。It\'sacharitythatcarriesnohumiliationwithit。

Marvellousitis,tothinkofschoolswhereyoudon\'thavetodrivethechildreninbutdrivethemout。Itwasnotsoinmyday。

Down—stairsjustnowIsawadancinglessongoingon。Youmustpayacentforalesson。Youcan\'tgetitfornothing。That\'sthereasonI

neverlearnedtodance。

Butitwasthepawnbroker\'sshopyouhaveherethatinterestedmemightily。I\'veknownsomethingaboutpawnbrokers\'shopsinmytime,buthereyouhaveawonderfulplan。Theordinarypawnbrokercharges,thirty—sixpercent;ayearforaloan,andI\'vepaidmoremyself,buthereamanorwomanindistresscanobtainaloan。foronepercent。amonth！It\'swonderful！

I\'vebeeninterestedinallI\'veheardto—day,especiallyintheromancesrecountedbyMrs。Thomas,whichremindsmethatIhavearomanceofmyowninmyautobiography,whichIambuildingfortheinstructionoftheworld。

InSanFrancisco,manyyearsago,whenIwasanewspaperreporter（perhapsIshouldsayIhadbeenandwaswillingtobe）,apawnbrokerwastakingcareofwhatpropertyIhad。Therewasafriendofmine,apoet,outofajob,andhewashavingahardtimeofit,too。Therewaspassageinit,butIguessI\'vegottokeepthatfortheautobiography。

Well,myfriendthepoetthoughthislifewasafailure,andI

toldhimIthoughtitwas,andthenhesaidhethoughtheoughttocommitsuicide,andIsaid"allright,"whichwasdisinterestedadvicetoafriendintrouble;but,likeallsuchadvice,therewasjustalittlebitofself—interestbackofit,forifIcouldgeta"scoop"

ontheothernewspapersIcouldgetajob。

Thepoetcouldbespared,andso,largelyforhisowngoodandpartlyformine,Ikeptthethinginhismind,whichwasnecessary,aswould—besuicidesareverychangeableandhardtoholdtotheirpurpose。Hehadapreferenceforapistol,whichwasanextravagance,forwehadn\'tenoughbetweenustohireapistol。Aforkwouldhavebeeneasier。

Andsoheconcludedtodrownhimself,andIsaiditwasanexcellentidea—theonlytroublebeingthathewassogoodaswimmer。Sowewentdowntothebeach。Iwentalongtoseethatthethingwasdoneright。Thensomethingmostromantichappened。Therecameinontheseasomethingthathadbeenonitswayforthreeyears。ItrolledinacrossthebroadPacificwithamessagethatwasfullofmeaningtothatpoorpoetandcastitselfathisfeet。Itwasalife—preserver！

Thiswasacomplication。AndthenIhadanidea—heneverhadany,especiallywhenhewasgoingtowritepoetry;Isuggestedthatwepawnthelife—preserverandgetarevolver。

Thepawnbrokergaveusanoldderringerwithabulletasbigasahickorynut。Whenheheardthatitwasonlyapoetthatwasgoingtokillhimselfhedidnotquibble。Well,wesucceededinsendingabulletrightthroughhishead。Itwasaterriblemomentwhenheplacedthatpistolagainsthisforeheadandstoodforaninstant。Isaid,"Oh,pullthetrigger！"andhedid,andcleanedoutallthegraymatterinhisbrains。Itcarriedthepoeticfacultyaway,andnowhe\'sausefulmemberofsociety。

Now,therefore,Irealizethatthere\'snomorebeneficentinstitutionthanthispennyfundofyours,andIwantallthepoetstoknowthis。Ididthinkaboutwritingyouacheck,butnowIthinkI\'llsendyouafewcopiesofwhatoneofyourlittlememberscalledStrawberryFinn。

PUBLICEDUCATIONASSOCIATION。

ADDRESSATAMEETINGOFTHEBERKELEYLYCEUM,NEWYORK,NOVEMBER23,1900。

IDON\'TsupposethatIamcalledhereasanexpertoneducation,forthatwouldshowalackofforesightonyourpartandadeliberateintentiontoremindmeofmyshortcomings。

AsIsatherelookingaroundforanideaitstruckmethatIwascalledfortworeasons。Onewastodogoodtome,apoorunfortunatetravellerontheworld\'swideocean,bygivingmeaknowledgeofthenatureandscopeofyoursocietyandlettingmeknowthatothersbesidemyselfhavebeenofsomeuseintheworld。TheotherreasonthatIcanseeisthatyouhavecalledmetoshowbywayofcontrastwhateducationcanaccomplishifadministeredintherightsortofdoses。

Yourworthypresidentsaidthattheschoolpictures,whichhavereceivedtheadmirationoftheworldattheParisExposition,havebeensenttoRussia,andthiswasacomplimentfromthatGovernment—

whichisverysurprisingtome。Why,itisonlyanhoursinceIreadacablegraminthenewspapersbeginning"RussiaProposestoRetrench。"I

wasnotexpectingsuchathunderbolt,andIthoughtwhatahappythingitwillbeforRussianswhentheretrenchmentwillbringhomethethirtythousandRussiantroopsnowinManchuria,toliveinpeacefulpursuits。IthoughtthiswaswhatGermanyshoulddoalsowithoutdelay,andthatFranceandalltheothernationsinChinashouldfollowsuit。

WhyshouldnotChinabefreefromtheforeigners,whoareonlymakingtroubleonhersoil？Iftheywouldonlyallgohome,whatapleasantplaceChinawouldbefortheChinese！WedonotallowChinamentocomehere,andIsayinallseriousnessthatitwouldbeagracefulthingtoletChinadecidewhoshallgothere。

ChinaneverwantedforeignersanymorethanforeignerswantedChinamen,andonthisquestionIamwiththeBoxerseverytime。TheBoxerisapatriot。Helovedhiscountrybetterthanhedoesthecountriesofotherpeople。Iwishhimsuccess。TheBoxerbelievesindrivingusoutofhiscountry。IamaBoxertoo,forIbelieveindrivinghimoutofourcountry。

WhenIreadtheRussiandespatchfurthermydreamofworldpeacevanished。Itsaidthatthevastexpenseofmaintainingthearmyhadmadeitnecessarytoretrench,andsotheGovernmenthaddecidedthattosupportthearmyitwouldbenecessarytowithdrawtheappropriationfromthepublicschools。Thisisamonstrousideatous。

Webelievethatoutofthepublicschoolgrowsthegreatnessofanation。

Itiscurioustoreflecthowhistoryrepeatsitselftheworldover。Why,IrememberthesamethingwasdonewhenIwasaboyontheMississippiRiver。Therewasapropositioninatownshiptheretodiscontinuepublicschoolsbecausetheyweretooexpensive。Anoldfarmerspokeupandsaidiftheystoppedtheschoolstheywouldnotsaveanything,becauseeverytimeaschoolwasclosedajailhadtobebuilt。

It\'slikefeedingadogonhisowntail。He\'llnevergetfat。I

believeitisbettertosupportschoolsthanjails。

TheworkofyourassociationisbetterandshowsmorewisdomthantheCzarofRussiaandallhispeople。Thisisnotmuchofacompliment,butit\'sthebestI\'vegotinstock。

EDUCATIONANDCITIZENSHIP。

OntheeveningofMay14,1908,thealumnioftheCollegeoftheCityofNewYorkcelebratedtheopeningofthenewcollegebuildingsatabanquetintheWaldorf—Astoria。Mr。ClemensfollowedMayorMcClellan。

IAGREEDwhentheMayorsaidthattherewasnotamanwithinhearingwhodidnotagreethatcitizenshipshouldbeplacedaboveeverythingelse,evenlearning。

Haveyoueverthoughtaboutthis？Isthereacollegeinthewholecountrywherethereisachairofgoodcitizenship？Thereisakindofbadcitizenshipwhichistaughtintheschools,butnorealgoodcitizenshiptaught。Therearesomewhichteachinsanecitizenship,bastardcitizenship,butthatisall。Patriotism！Yes;butpatriotismisusuallytherefugeofthescoundrel。Heisthemanwhotalkstheloudest。

YoucanbeginthatchairofcitizenshipintheCollegeoftheCityofNewYork。Youcanplaceitabovemathematicsandliterature,andthatiswhereitbelongs。

WeusedtotrustinGod。Ithinkitwasin1863thatsomegeniussuggestedthatitbeputuponthegoldandsilvercoinswhichcirculatedamongtherich。Theydidn\'tputitonthenickelsandcoppersbecausetheydidn\'tthinkthepoorfolkshadanytrustinGod。

Goodcitizenshipwouldteachaccuracyofthinkingandaccuracyofstatement。Now,thatmottoonthecoinisanoverstatement。ThoseCongressmenhadnorighttocommitthiswholecountrytoatheologicaldoctrine。Butsincetheydid,Congressoughttostatewhatourcreedshouldbe。

TherewasneveranationintheworldthatputitswholetrustinGod。Itisastatementmadeoninsufficientevidence。Leavingoutthegamblers,theburglars,andtheplumbers,perhapswedoputourtrustinGodafterafashion。But,afterall,itisanoverstatement。

Ifthecholeraorblackplagueshouldcometotheseshores,perhapsthebulkofthenationwouldpraytobedeliveredfromit,buttherestwouldputtheirtrustintheHealthBoardoftheCityofNewYork。

Ireadinthepaperswithinthelastdayortwoofapooryounggirlwhotheysaidwasaleper。Didthepeopleinthatpopuloussectionofthecountrywhereshewas—didtheyputtheirtrustinGod？Thegirlwasafflictedwiththeleprosy,adiseasewhichcannotbecommunicatedfromonepersontoanother。

Yet,insteadofputtingtheirtrustinGod,theyharriedthatpoorcreature,shelterlessandfriendless,fromplacetoplace,exactlyastheydidintheMiddleAges,whentheymadeleperswearbells,sothatpeoplecouldbewarnedoftheirapproachandavoidthem。

PerhapsthosepeopleintheMiddleAgesthoughttheywereputtingtheirtrustinGod。

ThePresidentorderedtheremovalofthatmottofromthecoin,andI

thoughtthatitwaswell。Ithoughtthatoverstatementshouldnotstaythere。ButIthinkitwouldbetterread,"WithincertainjudiciouslimitationswetrustinGod,"andifthereisn\'tenoughroomonthecoinforthis,why,enlargethecoin。

NowIwanttotellastoryaboutjumpingatconclusions。ItwastoldtomebyBramStoker,anditconcernsachristening。Therewasalittleclergymanwhowaspronetojumpatconclusionssometimes。Onedayhewasinvitedtoofficiateatachristening。Hewent。Theresattherelatives—intelligent—lookingrelativestheywere。Thelittleclergyman\'sinstinctcametohimtomakeagreatspeech。Hewasgiventoflightsoforatorythatway—averydangerousthing,foroftenthewingswhichtakeoneintocloudsoforatoricalenthusiasmarewaxandmeltupthere,anddownyoucome。

Butthelittleclergymancouldn\'tresist。Hetookthechildinhisarms,and,holdingit,lookedatitamoment。Itwasn\'tmuchofachild。Itwaslittle,likeasweet—potato。Thenthelittleclergymanwaitedimpressively,andthen:"Iseeinyourcountenances,"hesaid,"disappointmentofhim。Iseeyouaredisappointedwiththisbaby。Why？Becauseheissolittle。Myfriends,ifyouhadbutthepoweroflookingintothefutureyoumightseethatgreatthingsmaycomeoflittlethings。Thereisthegreatocean,holdingthenaviesoftheworld,whichcomesfromlittledropsofwaternolargerthanawoman\'stears。Therearethegreatconstellationsinthesky,madeupoflittlebitsofstars。Oh,ifyoucouldconsiderhisfutureyoumightseethathemightbecomethegreatestpoetoftheuniverse,thegreatestwarriortheworldhaseverknown,greaterthanCaesar,thanHannibal,than—er—er"（turningtothefather）—"what\'shisname？"

Thefatherhesitated,thenwhisperedback:"Hisname？Well,hisnameisMaryAnn。"

COURAGE

COURAGE。

Atabeefsteakdinner,givenbyartists,caricaturists,andhumoristsofNewYorkCity,April18,1908,Mr。Clemens,Mr。H。H。

Rogers,andMr。PatrickMcCarrenweretheguestsofhonor。Eachworeawhiteapron,andeachmadeashortspeech。

INthematterofcourageweallhaveourlimits。Thereneverwasaherowhodidnothavehisbounds。IsupposeitmaybesaidofNelsonandalltheotherswhosecouragehasbeenadvertisedthattherecametimesintheirliveswhentheirbraveryknewithadcometoitslimit。

Ihavefoundmineagoodmanytimes。Sometimesthiswasexpected—

oftenitwasunexpected。Iknowamanwhoisnotafraidtosleepwitharattlesnake,butyoucouldnotgethimtosleepwithasafety—razor。

Ineverhadthecouragetotalkacrossalong,narrowroomI

shouldbeattheendoftheroomfacingalltheaudience。IfIattempttotalkacrossaroomIfindmyselfturningthiswayandthat,andthusatalternateperiodsIhavepartoftheaudiencebehindme。Yououghtnevertohaveanypartoftheaudiencebehindyou;younevercantellwhattheyaregoingtodo。

I\'llsitdown。

THEDINNERTOMR。CHOATE。

ATADINNERGIVENINHONOROFAMBASSADOR

JOSEPHH。CHOATEATTHELOTOSCLUB,NOVEMBER24,1901。

Thespeakers,amongothers,were:SenatorDepew,WilliamHenryWhite,SpeakerThomasReed,andMr。Choate。Mr。Clemensspoke,inpart,asfollows:

THEgreatnessofthiscountryrestsontwoanecdotes。ThefirstoneisthatofWashingtonandhishatchet,representingthefoundationoftruespeaking,whichisthecharacteristicofourpeople。Thesecondoneisanoldone,andI\'vebeenwaitingtohearitto—night,butasnobodyhastoldityet,Iwilltellit。

You\'vehearditbefore,andyou\'llhearitmany,manytimesmore。Itisananecdoteofourguest,ofthetimewhenhewasengagedasayoungmanwithagentleHebrew,intheprocessofskinningtheclient。

Themainpartinthatbusinessisthecollectionofthebillforservicesinskinningtheman。"Services"isthetermusedinthatcraftfortheoperationofthatkind—diplomaticinitsnature。

Choate\'s—co—respondent—madeoutabillfor$500forhisservices,socalled。ButChoatetoldhimhehadbetterleavethemattertohim,andthenextdayhecollectedthebillfortheservicesandhandedtheHebrew$5000,saying,"That\'syourhalfoftheloot,"

andinducingthatmemorableresponse:"AlmostthoupersuadestmetobeaChristian。\'

Thedeep—thinkersdidn\'tmerelylaughwhenthathappened。Theystoppedtothink,andsaid:"There\'sarisingman。Hemustberescuedfromthelawandconsecratedtodiplomacy。Thecommercialadvantagesofagreatnationliethereinthatman\'skeeping。Wenolongerrequireamantotakecareofourmoralcharacterbeforetheworld。Washingtonandhisanecdotehavedonethat。Werequireamantotakecareofourcommercialprosperity。"

Mr。Choatehascarriedthattraitwithhim,and,asMr。Carnegiehassaid,hehasworkedlikeamoleunderground。

WeseetheresultwhenAmericanrailroadironissoldsocheapinEnglandthatthepoorestfamilycanhaveit。HehassobeguiledthatCabinetofEngland。

Hehasbeenspreadingthecommerceofthisnation,andhasdepressedEnglishcommerceinthesameratio。Thiswastheprincipleunderlyingthatanecdote,andthewisemensawit;theprincipleofgiveandtake—giveoneandtaketen—theprincipleofdiplomacy。

ONSTANLEYANDLIVINGSTONE。

Mr。ClemenswasentertainedatdinnerbytheWhite—friars\'Club,London,attheMitreTavern,ontheeveningofAugust6,1872。Inreplytothetoastinhishonorhesaid:

GENTLEMEN,—Ithankyouveryheartilyindeedforthisexpressionofkindnesstowardme。WhatIhavedoneforEnglandandcivilizationinthearduousaffairswhichIhaveengagedin（thatisgood:thatissosmooththatIwillsayitagainandagain）—whatIhavedoneforEnglandandcivilizationinthearduouspartIhaveperformedIhavedonewithasingle—hearteddevotionandwithnohopeofreward。Iamproud,Iamveryproud,thatitwasreservedformetofindDoctorLivingstoneandforMr。Stanleytogetallthecredit。IhuntedforthatmaninAfricaalloverseventy—fiveoronehundredparishes,thousandsandthousandsofmilesinthewildsanddesertsallovertheplace,sometimesridingnegroesandsometimestravellingbyrail。I

didn\'tmindtherailoranythingelse,sothatIdidn\'tcomeinforthetarandfeathers。IfoundthatmanatUjiji—aplaceyoumayrememberifyouhaveeverbeenthere—anditwasaverygreatsatisfactionthatIfoundhimjustinthenickoftime。Ifoundthatpooroldmandesertedbyhisniggersandbyhisgeographers,desertedbyallofhiskindexceptthegorillas—dejected,miserable,famishing,absolutelyfamishing—buthewaseloquent。

JustasIfoundhimhehadeatenhislastelephant,andhesaidtome:

"GodknowswhereIshallgetanother。"Hehadnothingtowearexcepthisvenerableandhonorablenavalsuit,andnothingtoeatbuthisdiary。

ButIsaidtohim:"Itisallright;Ihavediscoveredyou,andStanleywillbeherebythefour—o\'clocktrainandwilldiscoveryouofficially,andthenwewillturntoandhaveareg\'largoodtime。"

Isaid:"Cheerup,forStanleyhasgotcorn,ammunition,glassbeads,hymn—books,whiskey,andeverythingwhichthehumanheartcandesire;hehasgotallkindsofvaluables,includingtelegraph—polesandafewcart—loadsofmoney。BythistimecommunicationhasbeenmadewiththelandofBiblesandcivilization,andpropertywilladvance。"Andthenwesurveyedallthatcountry,fromUjiji,throughUnanogoandotherplaces,toUnyanyembe。Imentionthesenamessimplyforyouredification,nothingmore—donotexpectit—

particularlyasintelligencetotheRoyalGeographicalSociety。Andthen,havingfilleduptheoldman,wewerealltoofullforutteranceanddeparted。Wehavesincethenfeastedonhonors。

Stanleyhasreceivedasnuff—boxandIhavereceivedconsiderablesnuff;hehasgottowriteabookandgatherintherestofthecredit,andIamgoingtolevyonthecopyrightandtocollectthemoney。Nothingcomesamisstome—cashorcredit;but,seriously,IdofeelthatStanleyisthechiefmanandanillustriousone,andIdoapplaudhimwithallmyheart。WhetherheisanAmericanoraWelshmanbybirth,orone,orboth,matter\'snottome。SofarasIampersonallyconcerned,Iamsimplyheretostayafewmonths,andtoseeEnglishpeopleandtolearnEnglishmannersandcustoms,andtoenjoymyself;sothesimplestthingIcandoistothankyouforthetoastyouhavehonoredmewithandfortheremarksyouhavemade,andtowishhealthandprosperitytotheWhite—friar\'s\'Club,andtosinkdowntomyaccustomedlevel。

HENRYM。STANLEY。

ADDRESSDELIVEREDINBOSTON,NOVEMBER,1886。

Mr。ClemensintroducedMr。Stanley。

LADIESANDGENTLEMEN,ifanyshouldask,Whyisitthatyouarehereasintroducerofthelecturer？IshouldanswerthatIhappenedtobearoundandwasaskedtoperformthisfunction。Iwasquitewillingtodoso,and,astherewasnosortofneedofanintroduction,anyway,itcouldbenecessaryonlythatsomepersoncomeforwardforamomentanddoanunnecessarything,andthisisquiteinmyline。Now,tointroducesoillustriousanameasHenryM。Stanleybyanydetailofwhatthemanhasdoneisclearasidefrommypurpose;thatwouldbestretchingtheunnecessarytoanunconscionabledegree。WhenI

contrastwhatIhaveachievedinmymeasurablybrieflifewithwhathehasachievedinhispossiblybrieferone,theeffectistosweeputterlyawaytheten—storyedificeofmyownself—appreciationandleavenothingbehindbutthecellar。Whenyoucomparetheseachievementsofhiswiththeachievementsofreallygreatmenwhoexistinhistory,thecomparison,Ibelieve,isinhisfavor。IamnotheretodisparageColumbus。

No,Iwon\'tdothat;butwhenyoucometoregardtheachievementsofthesetwomen,ColumbusandStanley,fromthestandpointofthedifficultiestheirencountered,theadvantageiswithStanleyandagainstColumbus。Now,ColumbusstartedouttodiscoverAmerica。Well,hedidn\'tneedtodoanythingatallbutsitinthecabinofhisshipandholdhisgripandsailstraighton,andAmericawoulddiscoveritself。Hereitwas,barringhispassagethewholelengthandbreadthoftheSouthAmericancontinent,andhecouldn\'tgetbyit。

He\'dgottodiscoverit。ButStanleystartedouttofindDoctorLivingstone,whowasscatteredabroad,asyoumaysay,overthelengthandbreadthofavastslabofAfricaasbigastheUnitedStates。

Itwasablindkindofsearch。Hewastheworstscatteredofmen。

ButIwillthrowtheweightofthisintroductionupononeverypeculiarfeatureofMr。Stanley\'scharacter,andthatishisindestructibleAmericanism—anAmericanismwhichheisproudof。Andinthisdayandtime,whenitisthecustomtoapeandimitateEnglishmethodsandfashion,itislikeabreathoffreshairtostandinthepresenceofthisuntaintedAmericancitizenwhohasbeencaressedandcomplimentedbyhalfofthecrownedheadsofEurope,whocouldclothehisbodyfromhisheadtohisheelswiththeordersanddecorationslavisheduponhim。Andyet,whentheuntitledmyriadsofhisowncountryputouttheirhandsinwelcometohimandgreethim,"Welldone,"throughtheCongressoftheUnitedStates,thatisthecrownthatisworthalltheresttohim。Heisaproductofinstitutionswhichexistinnoothercountryonearth—institutionsthatbringoutallthatisbestandmostheroicinaman。I

introduceHenryM。Stanley。

DINNERTOMR。JEROME。

AdinnertoexpresstheirconfidenceintheintegrityandgoodjudgmentofDistrict—AttorneyJeromewasgivenasDelmonico\'sbyoverthreehundredofhisadmirersontheeveningofMay7,1909。

INDEED,thatisverysudden。Iwasnotinformedthattheverdictwasgoingtodependuponmyjudgment,butthatmakesnottheleastdifferenceintheworldwhenyoualreadyknowallaboutit。Itisnotanymatterwhenyouarecalledupontoexpressit;youcangetupanddoit,andmyverdicthasalreadybeenrecordedinmyheartandinmyheadasregardsMr。Jeromeandhisadministrationofthecriminalaffairsofthiscounty。

IagreewitheverythingMr。ChoatehassaidinhisletterregardingMr。Jerome;IagreewitheverythingMr。Shepardhassaid;

andIagreewitheverythingMr。Jeromehassaidinhisowncommendation。AndIthoughtMr。Jeromewasmodestinthat。Ifhehadbeentalkingaboutanotherofficerofthiscounty,hecouldhavepaintedthejoysandsorrowsofofficeandhisvictoriesinevenstrongerlanguagethanhedid。

IvotedforMr。Jeromeinthoseolddays,andIshouldliketovoteforhimagainifherunsforanyoffice。ImovedoutofNewYork,andthatisthereason,Isuppose,Icannotvoteforhimagain。

Theremaybesomeway,butIhavenotfounditout。ButnowIamafarmer—afarmerupinConnecticut,andwinninglaurels。Thosepeoplealreadyspeakwithsuchhighfavor,admiration,ofmyfarming,andtheysaythatIamtheonlymanthathasevercometothatregionwhocouldmaketwobladesofgrassgrowwhereonlythreegrewbefore。