A Face Illumined

第12章

Shehadnotseemedto-dayliketheshallowgirlwhohadhithertoacceptedofhismoreinnocentcomplimentsasiftheyweresugar-plums,andmerelyraisedherfingerinmockwarningatsuchascontainedaspiceofwickednessandboldness.Thereseemedacurrentofthoughtinhermindwhichhecouldnotfathom,andwhetheritwerecarryingherawayortowardhimhewasnotsure.Heunderstoodandwelcomedtheelementofrecklessness,butdidnotlikethewayinwhichshelookedatVanBerg,nordiditsuithispurposesthatsheshouldhearsomuchofwhathecharacterizedas"pioustwaddle."

Hewhisperedagainbolderwordsthanhehadeverspokentoherbefore.

"Iwishnobetterheaventhanthetouchofyourhandandthelightofyoureyes.See,themoonisrising;comewithme,forthisistheverywitchinghourforaramble."

Sheturneduponhimastartledlook,forheseemedtheveryembodimentoftemptation.Butsheonlysaidcoldly:

"Hush!Mr.VanBergisabouttosing,"andshesteppedsofarintothelightedroomthattheartistsawher.

WhenMissBurtonrosefromthepianoshedidnotreturntoherseatintheparlor,butstoodintheshadowofthedoor-wayleadingintothehall.Thethoughtofherhymnhadcomesodirectlyfromherheart,thathereyeswereslightlymoistwithanemotionthatwasmoreplainlymanifestonmanyotherfaces.Theoldgentlemanwhohadaskedhertosinghadtakenoffhisspectaclesandwasopenlywipinghiseyes.

Stanton,ashamedtohaveherseethefeelingshehadevoked,turnedhisbackuponherandslowlywalkeddownthecorridor.Shemisunderstoodhisactandthoughtitcausedbyindifferenceordislikeforthesentimentshehadexpressed.Hehadseemedtoherthusfaronlyasuperficialmanoftheworld,andthisactstruckherascharacteristic.Butbeyondthispassingimpressionshedidnotgivehimathought,andturned,withgenuineinterest,tolistentoVanBergwhohadsaidtoher:

"IrememberafewsimpleverseswhichhavenomeritsavethattheyexpresswhatIwishratherthanwhatIam."

Withmuchmorefeeling,andthereforepower,thanwashiscustom,hesangasfollows:

"IwouldIknewTheebetter——

Thattrustcouldbanishdoubt;

Iwishthatfrom\'theletter\'

ThySpiritmightshineout.

Iwishthatheavenwerenearer——

ThatearthweremoreakinTothehomethatshouldbedearerThantheonesomarredbysin.

IwishthatdesertsdrearyMightblossomastherose,Thatsouls,despairing,weary,Mightsmileandfindrepose."

BeforesingingthenextstanzahecouldnotforbearlookingtoseeifMissMayhewwerelistening,andthusithappenedthathisglancegavepeculiaremphasistothethoughtexpressed.Shewaslookingathimwithanintensityofexpressionthathedidnotunderstand.

Nothingthathedidescapedher,andthequickflashofhiseyesinherdirectionunintentionallygavethefollowingwordstheforceandpointednessofanopenrebuke;

"IwishthatoutwardbeautyWerethemirroroftheheart,ThatpurityanddutySupplantedwilyart."

Hedidnotseethatwithasuddenflameofscarletinherfaceshesteppedbackontheduskypiazzaasabruptlyasifshehadreceivedablow.Hadhedoneso,hemightnothavesungaseffectivelytheremainingverses.Afterthefirstconfusedmomentofshameandresentmentpassed,shepausedonlylongenoughtonotewithasenseofreliefthatothershadnotseenormadeanysuchapplicationofhiswordsasshebelievedhehadintended,andthenshetookMr.

Sibley\'sarmandwalkedaway,leavingtheremaningtwoversesunheard——

"IwishthatallwerebetterAndnearertotheirGod——

Thatevil\'sbrokenfetterWereburiedwithHisrod;

Thatlovemightlastforever,Andwe,infuture,findThereisnopowertoseverThestrongandtrueinmind."

AshesangthelastversetherewasalsoarapidchangeintheexpressionofMissBurton\'sface.Therewassomethingofheroldpallorthathasbeenmentionedbefore.Shelookedathimquestioninglyamomentasiftoseeifhewereconsciouslymakinganallusionthattouchedherverynearly,andthen,seeminglyovercomebysomesuddenemotionthatshewouldgladlyhide,shequicklyvanisheddownthedimlylightedhallway,andwasseennomoreuntilshecamedowntobreakfastthefollowingmorning,assmilingandcheeryasever.

"Confoundyou,Van,"saidStanton,astheartistescapedfromthethanksoftheaudienceintothehall,"Whatdidyouputinthatlastversefor?Youmadeherthinkofseeingherdeadfriendsagain,andsoshewasinnomoodtospeaktouspoormortalswhoarestillploddingoninthis\'valeoftears.\'I\'dgivemyearsforaquietchatwithherto-night.ByJove,Ineverwassostirredupbefore,andcouldturnChristian,Mohammedan,Buddhist,oranythingelse,ifsheaskedmeto."

"Ineithercase,Ik,"saidVanBerg,"yourworshipwouldbethesame,Iimagine,andwouldneverrisehigherthanthepriestess."

"Curseitall,"exclaimedStantonimpetuously,"Ifeelto-nightasifthatwerehigherthanIcaneverrise.Ineverwasafraidofawomanbefore;butno\'divinity\'ever\'hedgedaking\'likethatwhichfillsmewithanindescribableawewhenIapproachthisunassuminglittlewomanwhousuallyseemsnomoreformidablethanaflickeringsunbeam.Iagreewithyounow.Shehasevidentlyhadsomedeepexperienceinthepastthatgivestohercharacterapoweranddepththatweonlyhalfunderstand.IwishIknewherbetter."

"Good-night,"saidVanBerg,alittleabruptly;"Ithinkthatafterthisevening\'sexperience,neitherofusisinthemoodforfurthertalk."

Stantonlookedafterhimwithaloweringbrowandmuttered:"Ishesosensitiveonthissubject?ByJove.I\'msorry!Ifearwemustbecomerivals,Van.Andyet,"headdedwithadespairinggesture,"whatchancewouldIhavewithhimagainstme?"

"Icouldnotheardistinctly,"SibleyhadremarkedasIdatookhisarmandwalkedawayfromherpostofobservation."Wereyoudisgustedwithhispiouswailongeneralprinciples,ordidsomethinginhistheologyoffendyou?"

"It\'senoughthatIwasnotpleased,"sherepliedbriefly.

"Littlewonder.I\'msurprisedyoustooditsolong.VanBergandStantonarenicefellowstoleadaconventicle.IthinkI\'lltakeahandatitmyselfnextSundayevening,andcertainlywouldwithyoursupport.I\'llsaynothingofthesinger,butifyouwillgowithmetotherusticseatinyondershadywalk,I\'llsingyouasongthatIknowwillbemoretoyourtastethananyyouhaveheardthisevening."

"Pleaseexcuseme,Mr.Sibley;I\'mafraidofthenightair."

"Youareunusuallyprudent,"hesaid,alittletauntingly.

"WhichprovesthatIpossessatleastonegoodquality,"shereplied.

"PerhapsifMr.VanBergaskedyoutogoyouwouldtaketherisk."

"PerhapsImight,"sheadmitted,halfunconsciouslyandfromthemereforceofhabit,givingthenaturalanswerofacoquette.

"Hehadbetternotcrossmypath,"saidSibley,withsuddenvindictiveness.

"Come,come!"repliedMissMayhew,withacarelesslaugh,"let\'shavenohightragedy.I\'minnomoodforitto-night,andyouhavenooccasionforalarm.Ifhecrossesyourpathhewillstepdaintilyoveritatrightangles."

AtthatmomentVanBergcameoutonthepiazza.Althoughhecouldnothearherwords,herlaughandtonesjarredunpleasantlyonhisear.

"Yonderisagenuineaffinity,"hemuttered,"whichIwasafooltothinkIcouldbreakup;"andwithaslightcontemptuousgestureheturnedonhisheelandwenttohisroom.

"Icannotaltogetherunderstandyouthisevening,MissMayhew,"

saidSibley,withsomeresentmentinhistone.

"Youarenottoblameforthat,Mr.Sibley,forIdonotunderstandmyself.Ihavenotfeltwellto-day,andsohadbettersaygood-night."

Butbeforeshecouldleavehimheseizedherhandandexclaimed,inhissoft,insinuatingtones:

"Thatthenistheonlytroublebetweenus.NextSaturdayeveningIshallfindyouyouroldcharmingself?"

"Perhaps,"washerunsatisfactoryanswer.

Withastepthatgrewslowerandheaviereverymoment,shewenttoherroom,turnedupthelight,andlookedfixedlyatherselfintheglass,"IwishthatoutwardbeautyWerethemirroroftheheart,"

sherepeatedinaudibly,andtheherexquisitelipcurledinself-contempt.

"Ida,whatISthematterwithyou?"drawledhermother,lookingthroughtheopendoor-wayofheradjacentroom."Youactasifyouweredemented."

"WhydidyoumakemewhatIam?"sheexclaimed,turninguponhermotherinasuddenpassion.

"Goodgracious!whatareyou?"ejaculatedthatmatter-of-factlady.

"I\'masgoodasyouare——asgoodasoursetaverages,Isuppose,"

sheansweredinaweary,carelesstone."Goodnight;"andsheclosedandlockedherdoor.

"Oh,pshaw!"saidMrs.Mayhew,petulantly;"thosehymnshavemadeheroutofsortswithherselfandeverything.Theyusedtostirmeupinthesameway.Whycan\'tpeoplelearntoperformtheirreligiousdutiesproperlyandthenletthematterrest;"andwithayawnsheretiredatpeacewithherselfandalltheworld.

Idathrewherselfonaloungeandlookedstraightbeforeherwiththatfixed,vacantstarewhichindicatesthatnothingisseensavebytheeyeofthemind.

"Father\'sdrunkto-night,"shemoaned;"IknowitassurelyasifIsawhim.IalsoknowthatI\'minparttoblameforit.Couldoutwardbeautymaskablackerheartthanmine?Itdoesnotmaskitfromhimwhosangthosewords,"andsheburiedherfaceinherhandsandsobbed,until,exhaustedanddisheartened,shesoughsuchpoorrestandrespiteasafewhoursoftroubledsleepcouldbring.

ChapterXVIII.LovePuttoWork.

OnthefollowingdaytherewastheusualbustleofchangeanddeparturethatischaracteristicofalargesummerresortonMondaymorning.StantonfoundMrs.Mayhewveryreadytooccupytheseatshehadobtained,andallthemoresofromhisstatementofthefactthatseveralothershadspokenforthem.

"Ida,mydear,"calledhermother;"comehere,I\'vegoodnewsforyou.Ikhasgotusoutofthatodiouscornerofthedining-room,andsecuredseatsforusatMr.VanBerg\'stable."

"Iwishnoseatthere,"shesaiddecisively.

"Oh,itsallarranged,mydear;andagoodmanyotherswanttheseats,butIkwastooprompt."

"I\'llstaywhereIam,"saidIda,sullenly.

"Andhaveeveryoneinthehouseaskingwhy?"addedStanton,provokingly."Mr.VanBergtreatsyouasagentlemanshould.Whycannotyouactlikealadytowardhim?IfIwereyouIwouldnotcarrymypreferencesfortheSibleystyleoffellowssofarthatIcouldnotbeciviltoamanlikemyfriend."

"Youmisjudgeme,"criedIda,passionately.

"Youhaveastrangewayofprovingit.Allthatisaskedofyouistositatthesametablewithagentlemanwhohaswontherespectandadmirationofeveryoneinthehotel,whosesocietyispeculiarlyagreeabletoyourmotherandmyself,andwhohasalsoshownunusualcourtesytowardsyoueversincehelearnedwhoyouwere.WhatelsecanIthink——whatelsecanothersthink,thanthatyourtasteleanssodecidedlytotheSibleystylethatyoucannotevenbepolitetoamanofhighcultureandgenuineworth?"

"Youaretoosevere,Ik,"saidMrs.Mayhew."ForsomereasonthatIcannotfathom,Idadoesnotlikethisartist;andyetIthinkmyselfthatshewouldsubjectherselftoveryunpleasantremarksifshemadeanytroubleaboutsittingatthesametablewithhim."

"Canyounotsee,"retortedIda,irritably,"thatIkhasnotconsideredusatall,butonlyhimself?HewishestobenearMissBurton,andwithoutgivingusanychancetoobject,hasmadeallthearrangementssothatwemusteithercomplyorelsebethetalkofthehouse.It\'sjustapieceofhisselfishness,"sheconcludedwithtearsofvexationinhereyes.

"Oh,comeIda!"saidhermothercoaxingly,"Icanseeonlyamole-hillinthismatter,andIwouldn\'tmakeamountainoutofit.AsfarasIamconcerned,Ishouldenjoythechangeverymuch,and,asyousay,theaffairhasgonetoofarnowtomakeobjection.Idonotintendthateitheryouormyselfshallbethesubjectofunpleasantremark."

Andsothematterwassettled,butIda\'scoldnessandconstraint,whentheyallmetatdinner,veryclearlyindicatedthatthechangehadbeenmadewithoutherconsent.VanBergaddressedheraffablytwoorthreetimes,butreceivedbriefanddiscouraginganswers.

"Yourcousinevidentlyisnotpleasedwiththenewarrangementyouhavebroughtabout.IcannotseewhatIhavedoneoflatetovexher."

"I\'lltellyouthetrouble.YouoffendherbynotbeingthecounterpartofMr.Sibley,"saidStanton,irritably.

VanBerg\'sbrowdarkened."Doyouthink,"heaskedinameaningtone,"thatsheunderstandswhatkindofamanheis?"

"Oh,sheknowsthathecandance,flirt,andtalknonsense,andsheasksfornothingmoreandthinksofnothingfurther.I\'moutofpatiencewithher."

Stanton\'swordscontainedthemostplausibleexplanationofIda\'sconductthatoccurredtoVanBerg.Theepisodeinthestagehadmadethemacquainted,andherpreconceivedprejudiceandhostilityhadbeensofarremovedastopermitacertaindegreeofsocialcompanionship,whoseresultwouldnowseemonlyincreaseddislikeanddistaste.Ashesupposedshewouldexpressherself,"hewasnotofherstyle."HadshenotspentthegreaterpartofSundayafternoonandeveningwithSibley?Whatotherconclusionwastheresavethathewas"ofherstyle,"congenialbothinthoughtandcharacter!Andyethestillrefusedtoentertainthebeliefthatsherecognizedinhimmorethanafashionablemanoftheworld.

Ifonlyastheresultofthepiqueoriginatingontheeveningoftheconcert,IdaMayhewhadstoodalooffromhim,hecouldhopetoremovethisearlyprejudicebybetteracquaintance.Butiffulleracquaintanceincreasedheraversion,thenhemustbelievethatthedefectsinhercharacterwereradical,inwroughtthroughthewholewebandwoofofhernature.Hecouldnotassumethe"Sibleystyle"ifhewould,andwouldnotifhecould,wereherbeautyahundred-foldgreater,werethatpossible.

Hewasfastcomingtotheconclusion,therefore,thathemustabandontheprojectwhichhadsofascinatedhim,andwhosesuccesshadsostronglykindledhisimagination.Andyethedidsoreluctantly,veryregretfully,chafingasonlythestrong-willeddo,whenconfrontedandthwartedbythatwhichisonlyapparentlyimpossible,andwhichtheystillfeelmightandoughttobeaccomplished.

"Ifeelastheoldalchemistsmusthavedone,"heoftenthought.

"Hereisabasemetal.WhycanInottransmuteitintogold?"

Butastheconvictionofhisimpotencegrewuponhimhefeltsomethinglikeresentmenttowardtheonewhohadthwartedhispurpose;andsoitnaturallyhappenedthatwhentheymetagainatthesupper-table,hiscoolandindifferentmannercorrespondedwiththatofMissMayhewtoadegreethatgaveheradeeperpainthanshecouldunderstand.

"Whyshouldshecare?"sheaskedherselfahundredtimesthatevening.Buttheunpleasanttruthhourlygrewmoreplaintoherthatshedidcare.

Stantonandhermotherquietlyignoredher"foolishpique,"astheytermedit.IntruththeformerwassopreoccupiedwithMissBurton,andwithjealousyofhisfriend,thathehadfewthoughtsforanythingelse.

Headmittedtohimselfthathehadneverbeforebeensothoroughlyfascinatedandawakened;anditwasinaccordancewithhispleasure-loving,self-indulgentnaturetodriftonthisshiningtidewithersoeveritmightcarryhim.

ButwithagrowingfeelingofdisquietudehesawthatVanBergalsowasdeeplyinterestedinMissBurton,and,whatwasworse,hethoughthedetectedanansweringinterestonherpart.

Occasionally,whentheartist\'sfacewasturnedawaysothatsheobtainedagoodprofileviewofit,Stantonobservedherlookingathimwithanexpressionwhichbothpuzzledandtroubledhim.Sheseemedtoforgeteverythingandeveryone,andtogazeforamomentwithawistful,longingintensitythathewouldgivehisfortuneforweretheglancedirectedtowardhimself.AndyetwhenVanBergaddressedher,soughthersociety,methersuddenly,therewasnoheighteningofcolor,noratraceofthe"sweetconfusion"thatisusuallyinseparablefromanewandgrowingaffectioninamaiden\'sheart.

Apartfromthisoccasion,furtive,andwistfullookduringwhichhercheekswouldgrowpaleandsheappearforthemomentobliviousofpresentsurroundings,hermannertowardtheartistwasasfrankandnaturalastowardanyoneelse.Itwasevidentthatshelikedandrespectedhim,butevenhisjealousycouldnotdetectthecertaintyofanythingmore.

ButwhatwasthetendencyofVanBerg\'smindtowardher?Thatwasthequestionwhichtroubledhimmoreandmoreeveryday.FromthetimeoftheirpartingonthepreviousSabbatheveningtherehadbeenagrowingreluctanceonthepartofeachtospeakofonewhosolargelyoccupiedthethoughtsofboth.Theoldjestandbanteraboutthe"schoolma\'am"ceasedutterly,andtheymentionedheronlyoccasionallyas"MissBurton."Theoldfrankconfidencebetweenthemdiminisheddaily,andintheirsecretconsciousnesstheybegantorecognizethefactthattheymightsoonbecomeopenrivals.

TheattitudeofVanBergtowardtheyoungstrangerwhohadsodeeplyinterestedhimfromthefirsthouroftheirmeeting,waspeculiarbutcharacteristic.Hisreasonapprovedofher.Neverbeforehadhemetawomanwhohadseemedendowedwithsomanyattractivequalities.Shewasnotbeautiful,——acardinalvirtuewithhim——butherfaceoftenlightedupwithsomethingsonearakintobeautyastoleavelittlecausetoregretitsabsenceandtheconvictiongrewuponhimthatthespiritenshrinedwithinthegracefulandfragileformwasalmostperfectionitself.

Itbecameclearertohimeverydaythatsomedeepexperienceorsorrowhassothoroughlyrefinedawaythedrossofhernatureastomakeherseemtheembodimentoftruthandpurity.Whatthoughshestillmaintainedcompletereticenceastothepast,avoidingintheirconversationallallusiontoherself,asfaraspossible;

hestill,inhisinmostsoul,knewhecouldtrusther,andthatwhilehersmilingface,likethesunlitripplingsurfaceofmountainlakesnotfaraway,mighthidedark,silentdepths,itconcealednothingimpure.

Healsofeltthattherewasnooccasiontoimagineanydeepmysterytobepartofherpasthistory.Thefactsthatshewaspoorandorphanedsuggestedalltheexplanationsneeded,andhefeltsurethatthesorrowsshesosacredlyandunselfishlyshroudedfromthegeneralviewwouldbefranklyrevealedtothemanwhomightwintherighttocomfortandsustainher.

Couldhewinthatright?Didhewishtowinit?Asdayafterdaypassedhefeltthisquestiontobegrowingmoreandmorevitallyimportant.

Hewasnotonehebelievedwho,likeStanton,couldbecarriedawaybyasuddenandabsorbingpassion.Inanyandeverycase,reason,judgment,andtastewouldoffertheircounsel,andtheiradvicewouldbecarefullyweighed.Withincreasingdistinctness,thiscabinetwithinhisownbreasturgedhimtoobservethismaidenwelllestthechiefopportunityofhislifepassbeyondrecall.

Andhedidstudyhercharactercarefully.Stanton,withthekeenpainofjealousy,andIdaMayhewwithadisquietandsinkingofheartthatshecouldnotunderstand,notedthatheveryquietlyandunobtrusivelysoughthersociety.Whenshespoke,helistened.

Whenitwaspossiblewithoutattractingattentionhiseyesfollowedher,andyethisconductwasgovernedsothoroughlybygoodtasteandchivalricregardfortheladyherself,thatonlyeyesrenderedpenetratingbythepromptingsoftheheartwouldhaveseenanythingmorethanthegeneralfriendlinesswhichsheinspiredoneveryside.

Stanton,onthecontrary,grewmoreundisguisedanddemonstrativeinhisattentions,althoughheaimedtoconcealhisfeelingunderthehumorousandbanteringstyleofaddressthatwashabitualwithhim.TheguestsofthehousewerenotverylonginrecognizinginhimanadmirerofMissBurton,buttheyimaginedthathisdevotionwascausedmorebyawishtowhileawayhisidlehoursthanfromanyothermotive;anditwasalsoquiteevidentthattheyoungladyherselftookthesameview.Shegavealightandhumorousaspecttoeverythingshesaid,andpermittedhimscarcelyanopportunityforasolitary"tete-a-tete."Invainheplacedhisbaysandbuggyatherdisposal.

"Iamsocialandgregariousinmytastes,"shewouldreply,"andneedtheexhilarationofapartytoenjoymyself."

ThusStantonwasledtoacourseofactiondecidedlyincontrastwithhispasttendencies.Hewouldattachhisbaystoaroomycarriage,givinghera"carte-blanche"inmakingupthepartyifshewouldbeoneofthenumber.Hewouldperspirelikeaheroinanyboatingexcursionorpicnicthatshewouldoriginate;andthusthefastidiousandelegantfellowoftenfoundhimselfinunwontedcompany,for,withaninstinctpeculiarlyherown,shesoonfoundoutthecomparativelypoorandneglectedinthehotel,andappearedtoderiveherchiefpleasureinenliveningtheirdulldays.

Quick-wittedStantonearlylearnedthatthesurestwaytowinningasmilefromherwastobepolitetopeoplethat,hitherto,hehadhabituallyignored.ToMissBurtonherselfhemadenosecretofthefactthathiscoursewaspromptedonlybyadesiretopleaseher,butshesmilingpersistedinascribingitalltohisgood-natureandkindnessofheart.

ChapterXIX.Man\'sHighestHonor.

VanBerghadnotbeenverylongindiscoveringthatMissBurtonhadarulingpassion,anditseemedtohimaratheruniqueone.

Hewasfamiliarwiththemanyformsofself-seeking,commoninsociety;heknewofthosewhoweredevotedtoliterature,science,orsomefavoritecalling,ashewastohisart;hehadseenafewwhoapparentlysoaboundedingenialgood-naturethattheyrarelylostanopportunityofperformingakindact;andthereweremenandwomenintheworldwho,hebelieved,hadfullyconsecratedthemselvestotheworkofdoinggoodfromthepurestanddivinestmotives:buthedidnotrememberofeverhavingmetwithonewhosewholethoughtappearedbentondisseminatingimmediatesunshine.

AndyetthisseemedtrueofMissBurton.Withadmirabletact,withatirelesspatience,andanenergyoutofproportioninonesofragile,shekeptherselfquietlyandunobtrusivelybusyamongthemiscellaneouspeopleofthehouse.Hercharitywaswideenoughforall.Wherevershecoulddiscovergloom,despondency,dulness,orpain,thereshetriedtoshinelikeasunbeam,asifthatweretheprimallawofherbeing.Sherarelysoughtto"dogood"intheordinaryacceptanceoftheterm;stillmorerarelydidshespeakofherownpersonalfaith;tocheerandtobrightenappearedtobeheroneconstantimpulse.Itwasevidentthatthishadbecomeakindofsecondnatureinhernow;butthethoughtoccurredmorethanoncetoVanBergthatshehadadoptedthiscourseatfirsttoescapefromherselfandherownunhappymemories.Everydayincreasedtheconvictionthatsorrowwastheblack,heavysoilthatproducedthisconstantbloomofunselfishdeeds.

Beforetheweekwasovershegavehimspecialreasontobelievethatthiswastrue.Theywerewalkingupanddownthepiazzaoneeveningandhadbeentalkingwithmuchanimationonasubjectofmutualinterest.Butsheprovedthattherewasinhermindadeeperandstrongercurrentofthoughtthanthatwhichhadbeenapparent.

Astheduskinessincreased,andasintheirpromenadetheirfaceswereturnedawayfromthosewhomighthaveobservedthem,shesaidalittleabruptlyandyetwithtremuloushesitancy:

"Mr.VanBerg,doesyourphilosophyteachyoutobelieve,asyousung,onSabbathevening,that\'ThereisnopowertoseverThestrongandtrueinmind?\'"

Beforeansweringheturnedtolookather.Herfaceseemedtostandoutfromthegloomofthenightwithalightofitsown,andwassowhiteandeagerastobealmostspirit-like.Histonesweresadashereplied:

"IwishIcouldansweryouotherwisethanasImust,fortheimpulsetosaysomewordsofcomfort,whichIfeelyouneed,isverystrong.

IonlysangofwhatIwishedonSundayevening.Ihavelittlephilosophy,andstilllessofdefinitebeliefinregardtothefuturelife.WhileIamnotatheoreticskeptic,allquestionsoffaitharetomesovagueandincomprehensiblethatIamapracticalmaterialist,andliveonlyinthepresenthour."

"But,Mr.VanBerg,"shesaid,inalowtremuloustone,"canyounotunderstandthatsomepeoplecannotliveinthepresenthour,tryastheymay?Oh,howdesperatelyhardItrytodoso!Canyounotimaginethatsomethinginone\'spastmaymakeafuturenecessarytosavefromdespair?IfIlostmyholdonthatfutureIshouldgomad,"sheaddedinawhisper."Howcananymaterialisticphilosophybetruewhenitfailsusandsobitterlydisappointsusinourneed?"

"Idonotsayitistrue,"hereplied,earnestly."Indeedyourwordsandmannerprovetome,ascouldnolaboredargument,whatapoorsuperficialthingitis.Ifeel,withtheforceofconviction,thatitcannomoremeetyourneedthancouldthehuskswhichtheswinedideat."

"Sinceyouweresincere,Iwillbealso,"shecontinuedinthesamelowtone,lookingawayfromhimintothedarkcloudysky."AsthehymnIsungmayhavesuggestedtoyou,Ihavenotgotveryfarbeyondmeresubmissionandhope.Somethinginmyownsoulaswellasinrevelationtellsmethatthereisa\'happiershore,\'andI

amtryingtoreachit;buttheway,toooften,islikethatsky,utterlyopaqueandrayless."

"Iregretmoredeeplythanyoucaneverknow,MissBurton,thatI

findnothinginmyownknowledgeorexperiencetohelpyou.AllIcanofferismyhonestsympathy,andthatyouhavehadfromthefirst;forfromthetimeofourfirstmeetingtheimpressionhasbeengrowinguponmethatyourcharacterhadobtaineditspowerandbeautythroughsomedeepandsorrowfulexperience.ButwhileIamunabletogiveyouanyhelp,perhapsIcansuggestapleasantthoughtfromyourownillustration.Theblackcloudsyonderwhichseemtoyouatruetypeoftheshadowsthathavefallenacrossyourpath,are,afterall,butafilminthesky.Thesun,andamultitudeofotherluminousworlds,areshiningbeyondthemintheheavens.IwouldIhadyourchancesofreachinga\'happiershore.\'"

"That\'saprettysentiment,"shesaid,shakingherheadslowly;

"butthoseluminousworldsareagreatwayoff,withcoldandvastreachesofspacebetweenthem.Besides,aluminousworldwouldnotdomeonebitofgood.Iwant——"shestoppedabruptlywithsomethinglikealowsob."There,there,"sheresumedhastilydashingawayafewtears."Ihaveoccupiedyourthoughtstoolongwithmyforlornlittleself.Ididnotmeantoshowthisweakness,buthavebeenbetrayedintodoingos,Ithink,becauseyouimpressedmeasbeinghonest,andIthoughtthatperhaps——perhapsyourman\'sreasonmighthavethoughtofsomeargumentorprobablyconjecturerelatingtothesubjectthat,forcausesobvioustoyou,wouldbenaturallyinterestingtoonesoaloneintheworldasIam."

"IamsorryindeedthatIneverusedmyreasontosogoodapurpose,"

hereplied;"andyet,asIsaidatfirst,thesesubjectshaveeverseemedtomesoaboveandbeyondmyreasonthatIhavecarelesslygiventhemthego-by.MyprofessionhaswhollyabsorbedmesinceIhavebeencapableofanythingworththenameofthought,andtheworld,towardwhichyourmindisturning,issolargeandvaguethatIcannotevenfollowyou,muchlessguide."

Shesighed:"Itisindeed\'largeandvague.\'"Thensheaddedinfirm,quiettones:"Mr.VanBerg,pleaseforgetwhatIhavesaid.

Theweakmustshowtheirweaknessattimesinspiteofthemselves,andyourkindnessandsincerityhavebeguiledmeintoinflictingmyselfuponyou."

"Youaskthatwhichisimpossible,MissBurton,"herepliedearnestly.

"Icannotforgetwhatyouhavesaid,nordoIwishto.Ineednotassureyou,however,thatIregardyourconfidenceassacredasifitcamefrommyownsister.WillyoualsoletmesaythatIneverfeltsohonoredbeforeinmylifeasIhaveto-night,inthefactthatIseemedtoyourwoman\'sintuitionworthyofyourtrust."

Theywerenowturnedtowardsthelightthatstreameddimlyfromoneofthewindows.Shelookedupathimwithabright,gratefulsmile,butsheapparentlysawsomethinginhiseagerfaceandmannerwhichcheckedhersmileassuddenlyasifhehadbeenanapparition.

shegavehimherhand,sayinghastily,"Good-night,Mr.VanBerg;

Ithankyou.I——I——donotfeelverywell,"andshepassedswiftlytoasidedooranddisappeared.

ChapterXX.AWretchedSecretthatMustbeKept.

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