第9章

"Mr.VanBerg,Iamweary,andIimagineyouaretoo.IthinkI

willsaygood-night."

"Iscarcelywonderthatyouarefatigued.Youhavehadatryingday."

"Ithasbeenahorridday,"shesaid,emphatically.

"Itmighthaveendedmuchworse,nevertheless."

"Possibly,"sheadmittedwithashrug.

"Youhavemorereasontocongratulateyourselfthanyouimagine,MissMayhew.Eventhatdisagreeablesouvenirofourmorningperil,yourlameness,hasdisappeared,andyoumighthavebeenmaimedforlife."

"Mylameness,likemycourage,waschieflyafraudtobeginwith,andsoondisappeared;butIhaveothersouvenirsofthatoccasionthatIcannotgetridofsoeasily."

"IfIamoneofthem,youareright,MissMayhew;Ishallholdyoutoouragreementthismorning.Youputmeonmygoodbehavior——haveInotbehavedwell?"

"Yes,betterthanIhave.Iwasnotreferringtoyoupersonally,buttocertainmemories."

"Weagreedtoletby-gonesbeby-gones."

"Butothersarenotpartiestothisagreement,andeveryreferencetotheaffairisodioustome."

"Ishallmakenofurtherreferencetoit,andyoumustbefairenoughnottopunishmefortheactsofothers."

"YoualsodespisemeinyourheartofmycoursetowardsMissBurtonthisevening."

"IfIdespisedyouwouldIhavesoughtyoursocietythisevening?"

"Idonotknow.Idon\'tunderstandyou,ifyouwillpermitmybluntness."

"Possiblyyoudon\'tunderstandyourself,MissMayhew."

"IunderstandthatIhavehadamiserableday,andIhopeImayneverseeanotherlikeit.Good-night,sir."

ChapterXIII.Nature\'sBrokenPromise.

VanBerghadbeenlefttohimselfbutalittletimebeforeStantonandMr.Burleighcameoutuponthepiazza,andthethreegentlemensatdownforaquietchat.

"Well,"remarkedminehost,withasighofreliefsuchasapilotmightheaveaftertakinghisshiproundaperilouspoint;"well,thankstoMissBurton\'sgoodsense,theaffairhasendedwithoutanytrouble.Inahouselikethis,\'Satanisfindingmischiefstill\'

whenevermybackisturned,andsometimeshethreatenstogetuparowrightundermynose,asinthisinstance.Iwasa\'blarstedfool,\'asourEnglishfriendshaveit,nottoknowthatMrs.

Chint\'sdrama,althoughbeginningincomedy,mightendintragedyofmylosingsomegoodpayingboarders.StillfurtherdidIdemonstratethelengthofmyearsbyevenimaginingitpossiblethatMissBurtonwouldtakefivehundred,orfivehundredthousanddollarsinanysuchcircumstances.Butthewholethingwasdoneinajiffy,andMrs.Chintswaspossessedtohaveher\'tableauvivant.\'Livelypicturewasn\'tit?Still,ifMissMayhew,whenappealedtobyMrs.Chints,hadconfirmedmydoubts,Iwouldhavetriedtostopthenonsenseatanycost."

"DidMissMayhewadvisethestep?"askedStanton.

"Oh,no!Shewasnon-committal.Sheactedasifitwerenoneofheraffair,saveasitmightaffordheralittleamusement.Buttheserowsarenolightmatterstouspoorpublicans,whomustpleaseeveryoneandkeepthewholemenagerieinorder.Mr.Chintswasswearingupanddownhisroomthathehadbeenmadeafoolof.

Mrs.Chintswasforleavingto-morrowmorning,declaringthatshewouldnotenduresuchairsfromaschool-teacher.Theyarerichandhaveanumberoffriendswhoarecomingsoon,andsomymindwasfullof\'strangeoaths\'also,atmyprospectiveloss,whenthisblessedlittlewomanappears,tapsattheirdoor,entersliketheangelintothelion\'sden,andshutstheirmouthsbysomemagicallherown.Andnowthey\'regoingtostay;Mr.ChintswillgivethefivehundredtotheChildren\'sAidSociety,allissereneandI\'mhappy,somuchsothatI\'llsmokeanotherofyourgoodcigars,Mr.Stanton."

"Certainly,half-a-dozenifyouwish.Howdoyouimagineshequietedtheunrulybeasts?"

"Oh,Isupposeshegotaroundthemthroughthechild——somewhatasshewonovermywifethisafternoonbymeansofourcrossbaby.

It\'steething,youknow——andyethowshouldyouyoungchapsknowanythingaboutbabies!Nomatter,yourtimewillcome.Thispromenadingthepiazzawithlovelycreatureswhohavebeenhalftheafternoonattheirtoiletsisallverynice;butwaittillyouhaveweatheredinnumerablesquallsinthedeadofnight——thenyou\'lllearnthatteething-timeinahouseholdislikegoingaroundCapeHorn.Well,toreturnfromyourfuturetomypresent.Whensogood-naturedamanasIamgetsintoasympatheticmoodwitholdKingHerod,youcanimaginewhatastatethemother\'snervesmustbeinwhohastostanditnightandday.ButasMissBurtonhadbeencommendedtomycare,IfeltthatIwasindutyboundtointroducehertomywifeandshowhersomeattention.SoIsaidtomywife,thisafternoon,\'I\'mgoingtobringayoungladyintoseeyou.\'

\'DoyouthinkI\'minaconditiontoentertaincompany?\'sheasked,withafaintsuggestionofhardciderinhertone.\'Well,mydear,\'Iexpostulated,\'itwasjustthesameyesterday,andwillbealittlemoresoto-morrow,andIfeelthatIshallberemissifIdelayanylonger.\'\'Oh,verywell,\'shesaid,asifitwereatooththatmustcomeoutsoonerorlater,\'sincethemattermustbeattendedto,letushaveitoveratonce.\'Butblessyou,itwasn\'tovertillsupper-time.AsIbroughttheyoungladyin,thebabywakedoutofafive-minutes\'napthathadcostaboutanhour\'srocking,andIthoughttheroofwouldcomeoff.Mywifelookedcrossandworried——well,itwasprose,gentlemen,prose——notthepoetryoflife;andIsaidtomyself,\'IsupposeIhaveaboutmadeitcertainthatthisyoungwomanwillliveanddieanoldmaidbygivingherthisglimpsebehindthescenes.Ithoughttheladiescouldgetonbetterwithoutmethanwithme,soIbowedmyselfout,gladtoescapethedin;andIsupposedMissBurtonwouldsayafewpleasantthingsinthedirectionofMrs.Burleigh,whichshe,poorwoman,mightnotbeabletohear,andthenshewouldbowherselfout,alsogladtoescape.AnhourandahalflaterIwentbacktoseeifIcouldnotcoaxmywifeawayforadrive,andwhatdoyousupposeIsaw?"

"Thebabyinconvulsions,"saidStanton.

"Giveitup,"addedVanBerg.

"Sweettransformationscene;deephush;mywifeasleepinherrocking-chair,thebabyasleepinthearmsofMissBurton,whoheldupawarningfingeratmetobequiet.Butthemischiefwasdone;mywifestartedupandwasmortifiedbeyondmeasurethatshehadtreatedherguestsorudely.Thegoodfairy,however,wassogenuinelydelightedthatshehadquietedthebabyandgiventhetiredmotheralittlerest,thatwehadtocometotheconclusionthatshefoundpleasureinwaysthatareatrifleuncommon.Bysomemiracleorothershekeptthebabyasleep,andthenmywifeandItriedtoentertainheralittle,butweweretheonesthatwereentertained.Beforeweknewit,thesupper-bellrang,andthenI\'mblessedifthelittlechapdidn\'twakeupandgrinatusall.TothinkthenthatIshouldrewardherbylettingMr.Chintsslapherfacewithafive-hundred-dollarcheck!Iguesswe\'llallknowbetternexttime."

"Didshetellyouanythingfurtheraboutherhistoryorherconnections?"askedStanton.

Mr.Burleighstrokedhisbeardandlookedratherblankforamoment.

"NowIthinkofit,"heejaculated,"Ibehangedifshesaidawordaboutherself.AndnowIthinkfurtherofit,shesomehoworothergotMrs.Burleighandmyselfa-talking,andseemedsointerestedinusandwhatwesaid,thatIbehangedagainifwedidn\'ttellherallweknowaboutourselves."

"Sheimpresseseveryoneasbeingremarkablyfrank,andyetI

thinkitwillbefoundthatsheispeculiarlyreticentinregardtoherself,"remarkedVanBergmusingly."Well,it\'snotoftenI

takepeopleontrust,butIhavegiventhisladymyentirerespectandconfidence."

"Iassureyouthatthereisnotrustinthisbusiness,"saidMr.

Burleigh,emphatically."Ican\'taffordtoindulgeinsentiment,gentlemen;besides,itcouldn\'tbeanymorebecominginmethaninTomChints.Iwouldn\'ttakeanunprotected,unknownfemaleintomyhouseifshecamewithapairofwings.ButMissBurtonbringslettersthatestablishhercharacterasaladyastrulyasthatofanyotherwomaninthehouse.IoughttohavepreventedthisChintsbusiness,butthenfivehundredisanicelittleplum,andbeforeIpulledmyslowwitstogetherthethingwasdone."

"Bytheway,Mr.Burleigh,"remarkedStanton,"IhearthatthepartieswhoarenowatmyfriendVanBerg\'stablearesoontoleaveforthesea-shore.Canyougivemethreeseatsthereaftertheirdeparture?"

"Certainly;putyoudownrightalongsideofMissBurton."

"PerhapsVanBergfeelsthathehasthefirstclaimtosogoodaposition?"

"No,Stanton,Ishallnotplaceastrawinyourway."

"Youneverwereamanofstraw,Van.IfIwereseekingmorethantoenjoythesocietyofthisyounglady,whoseemstobeembodiedsunshine,Iwouldbesorrytohaveyouplaceyourselfintheway."

"Sunshinebroughttoafocuskindlesevengreenwood,"remarkedVanBerg,withasignificantnodathisfriend.

"Well,"saidMr.Burleigh,rising,"ifIhadnotfoundmymate,I\'dbeaburrthatthatlittlewomanwouldn\'tgetridofveryeasily.

Good-night,gentlemen.I\'llgiveeitheroneofyoumyblessing."

"Good-night,Van,"saidStanton,also."I\'mnotgoingtostayandlistentoyourabsurdpredictions.NeithershallIpermityoutoenjoyallbyyourselfthedelicatewineofthatwoman\'swit.Whengoodthingsarepassinground,Iproposetohavemyshare.Mypresencecan\'thurtyourprospects."

"Andifitdid,Ik,doyouthinkmesuchachurlastotrytocrowdyouaway?"

"That\'smagnanimous.Isupposeyouandmycousincanmanagetokeepthepeacebetweenyou."

"IthinkthechangewillbefarmoredisagreeabletoMissMayhewthantome."

"Youareverypolitetosayso.Good-night."

"Well,"musedVanBerg,whenlefttohimself;"I\'vemadeprogressto-dayafterafashion.Wehavebeenquitethoroughlyintroduced——infact\'throwntogether,\'asfateandallherfriendswillhaveit.

Imighthavebeenweeksingainingasmuchinsightintohercharacterascircumstanceshavegivenmeinafewbriefhours.Butwhatamiserablerevelationshehasmadeofherself——cowardicethismorning——fraudthisafternoon,andcoldselfishness,thatcanamuseitselfwiththemortificationandmisfortunesofothers,thisevening.Thisisthemoralsideofthepicture.ButwhenIcameto\'speer\'aroundtoseewhethershehadanymindorrealculture,theexhibitionwasstillmorepitiable.Yegods!thatagirlcanlivetoherageandknowsolittlethatisworthknowing!Sheknowshowtodress——thatis,howtoenhanceherphysicalbeauty;

andthat,Iadmit,isagreatdeal.Asfarasitgoesitiswell.

Butofthetasteofabeautifuland,atthesametime,intellectualandhighlycultivatedwoman,shehasnoconception;withheritisaquestionoffleshandbloodonly."

"Iwonderifitwilleverbeotherwise?Iwonderifhermarvellousbeauty,whichisnowlikeabuddingrose,thatpartlyconcealstheworminitsheart,willsoon,liketheoverblownflower,revealsoclearlywhatmarsitslifethatscarcelyanythingelsewillbenoticed.Whatafateforaman——tobetiedforlifetoawomanwhowill,withsuregradation,passfromatleastoutwardbeautytoutterhideousness!Beauty,inacaselikethis,isbutamaskwhichtimeortheloathsomefingersofdiseasewouldsurelystripoff;andthenwhatanobjectwouldconfrontthedisenchantedlover!

Itwouldbelikemarryingadisguiseddeath\'s-head.NeverbeforedidIrealizehowessentialismentalandmoralculturetogivevaluetomereexternalbeauty.

"Andyetsheseemstohaveakindofquicknessandaptness.Sheisnotwantinginwomanlyintuition.Istillaminclinedtobelieveshehasbeendwarfedbycircumstancesandherwretchedassociations.

Hermindhasbeengivennobettermeansofdevelopmentthantheknowledgeofherbeauty,thegeneralandsuperficialhomagethatitalwaysreceives,thelittleroundofthoughtthatcentresaboutself,andthedailyquestionofdress.That\'snarrowingtheworlddowntoacagelargeenoughonlyforapoll-parrot.Ifthebirdwithinhasaparrot\'snature,whatistheuseofopeningthedoorandshowingitlarkssinginginthesky?Ifearthat\'swhatI\'mtryingtodo,andthatIshallgobacktomyfallworkwithameagreportfolioandagrudgeagainstnature,formockingmewiththefairestbrokenpromiseevermade."

ChapterXIV.ARevelation.

Thenextdaythreatenedtobeadrearyone,fortherainfellsosteadilyastomakeallsunny,out-of-doorpleasuresimpossible.

Manylookedabroadwithfacesasdismalandcloudyasthesky;

forthenumberofthosewhoriseabovetheircircumstanceswithacheerycouragearebutfew.Humanfacescanshine,althoughthesunbeclouded;but,asarule,theshadowfallsonthefacealso,andtheregalspiritsuccumbslikeaclodofearth.

Thepeoplecamestragglingdownlatetobreakfastinthedarkmorning,and,withachildishegotismthatconsidersonlyselfandimmediatedesires,theloweringweatherwhichmeantrenewedbeautyandwealthtoalltheland,wasberatedasifitwereasmallspiteagainstthehandfulofpeopleattheLakeHouse.VanBergheardIdaMayhewexclaimingagainstthecloudsasifthisspitewereaimedatherselfonly.

"Someofherfriendsmightnotventurefromthecity,"shesaid.

"Theyyouthsarenotventuresome,then,"remarkedStanton,whoneverlostanopportunitytotease.

"Ofcoursetheydon\'twishtogetwet,"shepouted.

"AndyetI\'llwageranyamountthattheyarenotofthe\'saltoftheearth\'inanyscripturalsense.Well,theyhadbetterstayintown,forthiswouldbeaninstanceof\'muchventured,nothinggained.\'"

"Youremindmeofacertainfoxwhocouldnotsayenoughhardthingsaboutthegrapesthatwereoutofreach.Butmarkmywords,Mr.

Sibleywillcome,ifitpours."

"Hewouldn\'triskthespoilingofhisclothesforanywomanliving."

"Youjudgehimbyyourself.Oh,dear,howshallIgetthroughthislong,horribleday!Youmencansmokelikebadchimneysthroughastorm,butformethereisnoresourceto-day,butadullnovelthatI\'vereadoncebefore.Letmesee,I\'llreadanhourandsleepthree,andthenitwillbetimetodressfordinner.Oh,good-morning,Mr.VanBerg,"shesaystotheartistwhohadbeenlisteningtoherwhileapparentlygivingcloseattentiontoMrs.

Mayhew\'sinterminabletiradeagainstrainydays;"Ihavejustbeenenvyingyougentlemenwhocankillstupidhoursbysmoking."

"Iadmitthatitisalmostasbadassleeping."

"Iseethatyouhaveahomilypreparedonimprovingthetime,soIshallescapeatonce."

OnthestairsshemetMissBurton,whowasdescendingwithabreezyswiftnessasifsheweremakingachargeonthegeneralgloomandsullennessoftheday.

"Good-morning,MissMayhew,"shesaid;"I\'mgladtoseeyoulookingsowellafterthesevereshakingupyouhadyesterday.Youwouldalmosttemptonetobelievethatroughusageissometimesgoodforus."

"Ihavenosuchbelief,Iassureyou.Yesterdaywasbadenough,butto-daypromisestobeworse.Iwasgoingtomakeupaboatingparty,butwhatcanonedowhenthewaterisoverheadinsteadofunderthekeel?"

"Scoresofthings,"wasthecheeryreply."I\'mgoingtohaveagoodtime."

"I\'mgoingtosleep,"saidIda,passingon.

"MissBurton,"saidStanton,joiningheratthefootofthestairs,"Iperceive,evenfromyourmannerofdescendingtoourlowerworld,thatyouaredestinedtovanquishthedullnessofthisrainyday.

Don\'tyouwishanally?"

"Wouldyoubeanally,Mr.Stanton,ifyousawIwasdestinedtobevanquished?"

"OfcourseIwould."

"Lookintheparlorthen.Thereareatleastadozenladiesalreadyvanquished.Theyareoppressedbythefoul-fiend,\'ennui.\'

Transferyourchivalricoffertothemanddeliverthem."

"Stanton,"laughedVanBerg,"youareinhonorboundtodevoteyourselftothoseoppressedladies."

"TheprospectissodarkanddepressingthatIshallatleastcheermyselffirstwiththelightofacigar."

"Andsoyourchivalrywillendinsmoke,"shesaid.

"Yes,MissBurton,thesmokeofbattle,whereyouareconcerned."

"Ifearyourwitisreadierthanyoursword.Thesoldierthatboastshowhewouldoverwhelmsomeotherfoethantheonebeforehimlosescredittothedegreethatheprotests."

"Youaremoreexacting,MissBurton,thantheladywhothrewherglovedownamongthelions.WhatchancewouldHerculeshimselfhaveofliftingthosetwelveheavyfemalesoutofthedumps?"

"It\'snotwhatwedo,butwhatweattempt,thatshowsourspirit."

"ThenIshallexpecttoseeyouattemptgreatthings."

"I\'monlyawoman."

"AndI\'monlyaman."

"Onlyaman!whatgreatervantage-groundcouldonehavethantobeaman?"

"Theadvantageisnotsouncommonthatoneneedbeundulyelated,"

stateStantonwithashrug."Iforgethowmanyhundredmillionsofusthereare.ButI\'mcurioustoseehowyouwillsetaboutrenderingthehuesofthisleadendayprismatic."

"Onlybybeingtheinnocentcauseofyourhighlycoloredlanguage,Iimagine."

"Oh,dear,"exclaimedalittleboypetulantly,ashestrolledthroughthehallandlookedoutatthesteadydownfallofrain."Ohdear!

Whycan\'titstopraining?"

"There\'sthephilosophyofourtimeforyouinanutshell,"saidVanBerg."Whenahumanatomwantsanything,whatbusinesshastheuniversetostandinitsway?"

"Butyouhavenobetterphilosophytoofferthedisconsolatelittlefellow,Mr.BanBerg?"MissBurtonasked.

"Now,Van,it\'syourturn.Remember,MissBurton,hehasthesamevantage-groundthatIhave.Indeedhe\'shalfaninchtaller."

"Theworldlongagolearnedbetterthantomeasuremenbyinches,Mr.Stanton."

"Alas,MissBurton,"saidVanBerg;"thebestphilosophyIhaveisthis:whenitrains,letitrain."

"AndthusI\'mprivilegedtomeetrepresentativesofthosetwoancientandhonorableschools,theStoicandEpicurean,andyouboththink,Ifear,thatifXanthippehadfoundedaschool,myphilosophywouldalsobedefined.ButperhapsyouwillthinkbetterofmeifItellthatlittlefellowastorytopassthetimeforhim.What\'sthematter,littlefolk?"sheasked,fortwoorthreemoresmallcloudedfaceshadgatheredatthedoor.

"Matterenough,"saidtheboy."Thishorridoldrainkeepsusinthehouse,wherewecan\'tdoanythingorstayanywhere.Wemustn\'tplayintheparlor,wemustn\'tmakeanoiseinthehalls,wemustn\'trunonthepiazzas.I\'dliketoliveinaworldwheretherewassomeplaceforboys."

"Poorchild,"saidMissBurton;"thisrainisasbadforyouasthedelugetoNoah\'sdove,ithasleftyounorefugeforthesoleofyourfoot.Willyoucomewithme?Noonehassaidyoumustnothearajollystory."

"Youwon\'ttellmeaboutanygoodlittleboyswhodiedwhentheywereasbigasIam?"

"I\'llkeepmyword——itshallbeajollystory."

"Maywehearittoo?"askedtheotherchildren.

"Yes,allofyou."

"Whereshallwego?"

"Wewon\'tdisturbanyoneinthefarcorneroftheparlorbythepiano.Ifyouknowofanyotherlittlepeople,youcanbringthemthere,too,"andtheyeachdartedoffinsearchofespecialcronies.

"Maywenothearthestoryalso?"askedStanton.

"No,indeed,Imaybeabletointerestchildren,butnotphilosophers."

"Thenwewillgoandmeditate,"saidVanBerg.

"Yes,"sheadded,"andinaccordancewithaNewYorkcustomofgreatantiquity,madefamiliartoyou,nodoubt,bythatgravehistorianDiedrichKnickerbocker,whogivesseveralgraphicaccountsofsuchcloudyruminationsonthepartofyourcity\'sgreat-grandfathers."

"IfearyouthinkthattheworshipfulPeterStuyvensant\'scounsellorsindulgedinmoretobaccothanthought,andthatthemajorityofthemhadasfewideasasoneofMr.Burleigh\'schimneys,"saidVanBerg."Andyouregardusasthedirectdescendantsofthesemen,whoseliveswerecrownedwithsmoke-wreathsonly."

"Now,Mr.VanBerg,youproveyourselftobeaphilosopherofamodernschool,youdrawyourinductionssofarandwidefromyourdiminutivepremise."

"Well,MissBurton,youstandinveryfavorablecontrastwithuspoormortals.Wearegoingouttoaddtothecloudsthatlowerovertheworld,whileyouaretryingtobanishthem."

"Andif,afterhelpingthechildrentowardsthecloseofthisdismalday,yourheartshouldrelenttowardsus,"addedStanton,"youwillfindtwoworthyobjectsofyourcharity."

"Ohwhatafallingoffishere!"sheexclaimed,followingtheimpatientchildren."Knightsatfirst,thenphilosophers,andnowobjectsofcharity."

MissBurtonevidentlykeptherword,andtolda"jollystory,"forthefriendssawthroughtheparlorwindowsthatthecirclearoundhergrewlargerandmorehilariouscontinually.Thenwouldfollowmomentsofraptandeagerattention,showingthatthetalegainedinexcitementandinterestwhatitlostinhumor.Youngpeople,whodidnotliketobeclassedwithchildren,onebyoneyieldedtothetemptation.Therewaslifeandenjoymentinthatcorneranddulnesselsewhere,andnothingissoattractiveintheworldasgenuineandjoyouslife.

Evenelderlyladieslookedwistfullyupattheoccasionalburstsofcontagiousmerriment,andthensighedthattheyhadlostthepoweroflaughingsoeasily.

Atlastthemarvelouslegendcametoanendamidaroundofprolongedapplause.

"Another,another!"wasthegeneraloutcry.

ButMissBurtonhadobservedthattheladiesandgentlemenpresentseemedinclinedtobefriendlytowardstheyoungpeople\'sfun,andthereforeshebroachedanotherschemeofpleasurethatwouldvarytheentertainment.

"Perhaps,"shesaid,"yourpapasandmammasandtheothergoodpeoplewillnotobjecttoanold-fashionedVirginiareel."

Ashoutofwelcomegreetedthisproposition.

MissBurtonraisedherfingersoimpressivelythattherewasaninstanthush.Indeedsheseemedtohavegainedentirecontrolofthelargeandmiscellaneousgroupwhichsurroundedher.

"Wewilldrawupapetition,"shesaid;"forwebestenjoyourownrightsandpleasureswhenrespectingthoseofothers.Thislittleboyandgirlshalltakethepetitionaroundtoalltheladiesandgentlemenintheroom,andthisshallbethepetition:

"\'Dearladyandkindsir:Pleasedon\'tobjecttoourdancingaVirginiareelintheparlor.\'"

"Allwhowishtodancecansignit.Nowwewillgototheofficeanddrawupthepetition."Andawaytheyallstarted,theyoungerchildren,wildwithglee,caperinginadvance.