第9章

Butwhetherthesesuspicionsareabsurdornot，hitormiss，itistheadvocate’sduty，asitappears，tourgethem。HewantstomakeasunfavorableanimpressionaspossiblewithregardtoPeytel’scharacter。he，therefore，must，forcontrast’ssake，giveallsortsofpraisetohisvictim，andawakeneverysympathyinthepoorfellow’sfavor。Havingdonethis，asfarasliesinhispower，havingexaggeratedeverycircumstancethatcanbeunfavorabletoPeytel，andgivenhisowntaleinthebaldestmannerpossible——

havingdeclaredthatPeytelisthemurdererofhiswifeandservant，theCrownnowproceedstobackthisassertion，byshowingwhatinterestedmotiveshehad，andbyrelating，afteritsownfashion，thecircumstancesofhismarriage。

Theymaybetoldbrieflyhere。Peytelwasofagoodfamily，ofMacon，andentitled，athismother’sdeath，toaconsiderableproperty。Hehadbeeneducatedasanotary，andhadlatelypurchasedabusiness，inthatline，inBelley，forwhichhehadpaidalargesumofmoney。partofthesum，15，000francs，forwhichhehadgivenbills，wasstilldue。

NearBelley，PeytelfirstmetFeliciteAlcazar，whowasresidingwithherbrother-in-law，MonsieurdeMontrichard。and，knowingthattheyounglady’sfortunewasconsiderable，hemadeanofferofmarriagetothebrother-in-law，whothoughtthematchadvantageous，andcommunicatedonthesubjectwithFelicite’smother，MadameAlcazar，atParis。AfteratimePeytelwenttoParis，topresshissuit，andwasaccepted。Thereseemstohavebeennoaffectationofloveonhisside。andsomelittlerepugnanceonthepartofthelady，whoyielded，however，tothewishesofherparents，andwasmarried。Thepartiesbegantoquarrelontheverydayofthemarriage，andcontinuedtheirdisputesalmosttothecloseoftheunhappyconnection。Felicitewashalfblind，passionate，sarcastic，clumsyinherpersonandmanners，andilleducated。Peytel，amanofconsiderableintellectandpretensions，whohadlivedforsometimeatParis，wherehehadmingledwithgoodliterarysociety。Theladywas，infact，asdisagreeableapersonascouldwellbe，andtheevidencedescribessomesceneswhichtookplacebetweenherandherhusband，showinghowdeeplyshemusthavemortifiedandenragedhim。

AchargeveryclearlymadeoutagainstPeytel，isthatofdishonesty。

heprocuredfromthenotaryofwhomheboughthisplaceanacquittanceinfull，whereastherewere15，000francsowing，aswehaveseen。Healso，inthecontractofmarriage，whichwastohaveresembled，inallrespects，thatbetweenMonsieurBroussaisandanotherDemoiselleAlcazar，causedanalterationtobemadeinhisfavor，whichgavehimcommandoverhiswife’sfundedproperty，withoutfurnishingtheguaranteesbywhichtheotherson-in-lawwasbound。And，almostimmediatelyafterhismarriage，Peytelsoldoutofthefundsasumof50，000francs，thatbelongedtohiswife，anduseditforhisownpurposes。

Abouttwomonthsafterhismarriage，PEYTELPRESSEDHISWIFETO

MAKEHERWILL。Hehadmadehis，hesaid，leavingeverythingtoher，incaseofhisdeath：aftersomeparley，thepoorthingconsented。*Thisisacruelsuspicionagainsthim。andMr。

Substitutehasnoneedtoenlargeuponit。Asforthepreviousfact，thedishoneststatementaboutthe15，000francs，thereisnothingmurderousinthat——nothingwhichamanveryeagertomakeagoodmarriagemightnotdo。Thesamemaybesaidofthesuppression，inPeytel’smarriagecontract，oftheclausetobefoundinBroussais’s，placingrestrictionsupontheuseofthewife’smoney。Mademoiselled’Alcazar’sfriendsreadthecontractbeforetheysignedit，andmighthaverefusedit，hadtheysopleased。

*Peytel，saystheactofaccusation，didnotfailtoseethedangerwhichwouldmenacehim，ifthiswill(whichhadescapedthemagistratesintheirsearchofPeytel’spapers)wasdiscovered。

He，therefore，instructedhisagenttotakepossessionofit，whichhedid，andthefactwasnotmentionedforseveralmonthsafterwards。Peytelandhisagentwerecalledupontoexplainthecircumstance，butrefused，andtheirsilenceforalongtimeinterruptedthe’instruction’(gettingupoftheevidence)。Allthatcouldbeobtainedfromthemwasanavowal，thatsuchawillexisted，constitutingPeytelhiswife’ssolelegatee。andapromise，ontheirparts，toproduceitbeforethecourtgaveitssentence。Butwhykeepthewillsecret？Theanxietyaboutitwassurelyabsurdandunnecessary：thewholeofMadamePeytel’sfamilyknewthatsuchawillwasmade。Shehadconsultedhersisterconcerningit，whosaid——Ifthereisnootherwayofsatisfyinghim，makethewill。andthemother，whensheheardofit，criedout——Doesheintendtopoisonher？

Aftersomedisputes，whichtookplacebetweenPeytelandhiswife(therewerecontinualquarrels，andcontinualletterspassingbetweenthemfromroomtoroom)，thelatterwasinducedtowritehimacoupleofexaggeratedletters，swearingbytheashesofherfatherthatshewouldbeanobedientwifetohim，andentreatinghimtocounselanddirecther。Theseletterswereseenbymembersofthelady’sfamily，who，inthequarrelsbetweenthecouple，alwaystookthehusband’spart。TheywerefoundinPeytel’scabinet，afterhehadbeenarrestedforthemurder，andafterhehadhadfullaccesstoallhispapers，ofwhichhedestroyedorleftasmanyashepleased。TheaccusationmakesitamatterofsuspicionagainstPeytel，thatheshouldhavelefttheselettersofhiswife’sinaconspicuoussituation。

Allthesecircumstances，saystheaccusation，throwafrightfullightuponPeytel’splans。ThelettersandwillofMadamePeytelareinthehandsofherhusband。Threemonthspassaway，andthispoorwomanisbroughttoherhome，inthemiddleofthenight，withtwoballsinherhead，stretchedatthebottomofhercarriage，bythesideofapeasant。

WhatotherthanSebastianPeytelcouldhavecommittedthismurder？——whomcoulditprofit？——whobuthimselfhadanodiouschaintobreak，andaninheritancetoreceive？Whyspeakoftheservant’sprojectedrobbery？ThepistolsfoundbythesideofLouis’sbody，theballsboughtbyhimatMacon，andthosediscoveredatBelleyamonghiseffects，wereonlytheresultofaperfidiouscombination。Thepistol，indeed，whichwasfoundonthehillofDarde，onthenightofthe1stofNovember，couldonlyhavebelongedtoPeytel，andmusthavebeenthrownbyhim，nearthebodyofhisdomestic，withthepaperwhichhadbeforeenvelopedit。

WhohadseenthispistolinthehandsofLouis？Amongallthegendarmes，work-women，domestics，employedbyPeytelandhisbrother-in-law，isthereonesinglewitnesswhohadseenthisweaponinLouis’spossession？ItistruethatMadamePeyteldid，ononeoccasion，speaktoM。deMontrichardofapistol。whichhadnothingtodo，however，withthatfoundnearLouisRey。

Isthisjustice，orgoodreason？Justreversetheargument，andapplyittoRey。WhobutReycouldhavecommittedthismurder？——

whobutReyhadalargesumofmoneytoseizeupon？——apistolisfoundbyhisside，ballsandpowderinhispocket，otherballsinhistrunksathome。Thepistolfoundnearhisbodycouldnot，indeed，havebelongedtoPeytel：didanymaneverseeitinhispossession？Theverygunsmithwhosoldit，andwhoknewPeytel，wouldhenothaveknownthathehadsoldhimthispistol？Athisownhouse，Peytelhasacollectionofweaponsofallkinds。

everybodyhasseenthem——amanwhomakessuchcollectionsisanxioustodisplaythem。Didanyoneeverseethisweapon？——Notone。AndMadamePeyteldid，inherlifetime，remarkapistolinthevalet’spossession。Shewasshort-sighted，andcouldnotparticularizewhatkindofpistolitwas。butshespokeofittoherhusbandandherbrother-in-law。Thisisnotsatisfactory，ifyouplease。but，atleast，itisassatisfactoryastheothersetofsuppositions。ItistheverychainofargumentwhichwouldhavebeenbroughtagainstLouisReybythisverysamecompileroftheactofaccusation，hadReysurvived，insteadofPeytel，andhadhe，asmostundoubtedlywouldhavebeenthecase，beentriedforthemurder。

ThisargumentwasshortlyputbyPeytel’scounsel：——ifPeytelhadbeenkilledbyReyinthestruggle，wouldyounothavefoundReyguiltyofthemurderofhismasterandmistress？Itissuchadreadfuldilemma，thatIwonderhowjudgesandlawyerscouldhavedaredtopersecutePeytelinthemannerwhichtheydid。

Aftertheactofaccusation，whichlaysdownallthesuppositionsagainstPeytelasfacts，whichwillnotadmitthetruthofoneoftheprisoner’sallegationsinhisowndefence，comesthetrial。

Thejudgeisquiteasimpartialastheprepareroftheindictment，aswillbeseenbythefollowingspecimensofhisinterrogatories：——

Judge。Theactofaccusationfindsinyourstatementcontradictions，improbabilities，impossibilities。Thusyourdomestic，whohaddeterminedtoassassinateyou，inordertorobyou，andwhoMUSTHAVECALCULATEDUPONTHECONSEQUENCEOFA

FAILURE，hadneitherpassportnormoneyuponhim。Thisisveryunlikely。becausehecouldnothavegonefarwithonlyasinglehalfpenny，whichwasallhehad。

Prisoner。Myservantwasknown，andoftenpassedthefrontierwithoutapassport。

Judge。YOURDOMESTICHADTOASSASSINATETWOPERSONS，andhadnoweaponbutasinglepistol。Hehadnodagger。andtheonlythingfoundonhimwasaknife。

Prisoner。Inthecartherewereseveralturner’simplements，whichhemighthaveused。

Judge。Buthehadnotthosearmsuponhim，becauseyoupursuedhimimmediately。Hehad，accordingtoyou，onlythisoldpistol。

Prisoner。Ihavenothingtosay。

Judge。Yourdomestic，insteadofflyingintowoods，whichskirttheroad，ranstraightforwardontheroaditself：THIS，AGAIN，IS

VERYUNLIKELY。

Prisoner。ThisisaconjectureIcouldanswerbyanotherconjecture。Icanonlyreasononthefacts。

Judge。Howfardidyoupursuehim？

Prisoner。Idon’tknowexactly。

Judge。Yousaid’twohundredpaces。’

Noanswerfromtheprisoner。

Judge。Yourdomesticwasyoung，active，robust，andtall。Hewasaheadofyou。Youwereinacarriage，fromwhichyouhadtodescend：youhadtotakeyourpistolsfromacushion，andTHENyourhammer——howarewetobelievethatyoucouldhavecaughthim，ifheran？ItisIMPOSSIBLE。

Prisoner。Ican’texplainit：IthinkthatReyhadsomedefectinoneleg。I，formypart，runtolerablyfast。

Judge。Atwhatdistancefromhimdidyoufireyourfirstshot？

Prisoner。Ican’ttell。

Judge。Perhapshewasnotrunningwhenyoufired。

Prisoner。Isawhimrunning。

Judge。Inwhatpositionwasyourwife？

Prisoner。Shewasleaningonmyleftarm，andthemanwasontherightsideofthecarriage。

Judge。Theshotmusthavebeenfiredaboutportant，becauseitburnedtheeyebrowsandlashesentirely。Theassassinmusthavepassedhispistolacrossyourbreast。

Prisoner。Theshotwasnotfiredsoclose。Iamconvincedofit：

professionalgentlemenwillproveit。

Judge。Thatiswhatyoupretend，becauseyouunderstandperfectlytheconsequencesofadmittingthefact。Yourwifewashitwithtwoballs——onestrikingdownwards，totheright，bythenose，theothergoinghorizontallythroughthecheek，totheleft。

Prisoner。Thecontrarywillbeshownbythewitnessescalledforthepurpose。

Judge。ITISAVERYUNLUCKYCOMBINATIONFORYOUthattheseballs，whichwent，yousay，fromthesamepistol，shouldhavetakentwodifferentdirections。

Prisoner。Ican’tdisputeaboutthevariouscombinationsoffire-

arms——professionalpersonswillbeheard。

Judge。Accordingtoyourstatement，yourwifesaidtoyou，’Mypoorhusband，takeyourpistols。’

Prisoner。Shedid。

Judge。Inamannerquitedistinct。

Prisoner。Yes。

Judge。Sodistinctthatyoudidnotfancyshewashit？

Prisoner。Yes。thatisthefact。

Judge。HERE，AGAIN，ISANIMPOSSIBILITY。andnothingismoreprecisethanthedeclarationofthemedicalmen。Theyaffirmthatyourwifecouldnothavespoken——theirreportisunanimous。

Prisoner。Icanonlyopposetoitquitecontraryopinionsfromprofessionalmen，also：youmusthearthem。

Judge。Whatdidyourwifedonext？……

Judge。Youdenythestatementsofthewitnesses：(theyrelatedtoPeytel’sdemeanorandbehavior，whichthejudgewishestoshowwereveryunusual——andwhatiftheywere？)Here，however，aresomemutewitnesses，whosetestimony，youwillnotperhapsrefuse。

NearLouisRey’sbodywasfoundahorse-cloth，apistol，andawhip……Yourdomesticmusthavehadthisclothuponhimwhenhewenttoassassinateyou：itwaswetandheavy。Anassassindisencumbershimselfofanythingthatislikelytoimpedehim，especiallywhenheisgoingtostrugglewithamanasyoungashimself。

Prisoner。Myservanthad，Ibelieve，thiscoveringonhisbody。

itmightbeusefultohimtokeeptheprimingofhispistoldry。

Thepresidentcausedtheclothtobeopened，andshowedthattherewasnohook，ortie，bywhichitcouldbeheldtogether。andthatReymusthavehelditwithonehand，and，intheother，hiswhip，andthepistolwithwhichheintendedtocommitthecrime。whichwasimpossible。

Prisoner。Theseareonlyconjectures。

Andwhatconjectures，myGod！uponwhichtotakeawaythelifeofaman。Jeffreys，orFouquierTinville，couldscarcelyhavedaredtomakesuch。Suchprejudice，suchbitterpersecution，suchprimingofthejury，suchmonstrousassumptionsandunreason——fancythemcomingfromanimpartialjudge！Themanisworsethanthepublicaccuser。

Rey，saystheJudge，couldnothavecommittedthemurder，BECAUSEHEHADNOMONEYINHISPOCKET，TOFLY，INCASEOFFAILURE。

Andwhatistheprecisesumthathislordshipthinksnecessaryforagentlemantohave，beforehemakessuchanattempt？Arethemenwhomurderformoney，usuallyinpossessionofacertainindependencebeforetheybegin？HowmuchmoneywasRey，aservant，wholovedwineandwomen，hadbeenstoppingatascoreofinnsontheroad，andhad，probably，anannualincomeof400francs，——howmuchmoneywasReylikelytohave？

Yourservanthadtoassassinatetwopersons。ThisIhavementionedbefore。Whyhadhetoassassinatetwopersons，*whenonewasenough？IfhehadkilledPeytel，couldhenothaveseizedandgaggedhiswifeimmediately？

*M。Balzac’stheoryofthecaseis，thatReyhadintriguedwithMadamePeytel。havingknownherprevioustohermarriage，whenshewasstayinginthehouseofherbrother-in-law，MonsieurdeMontrichard，whereReyhadbeenaservant。

Yourdomesticranstraightforward，insteadoftakingtothewoods，bythesideoftherood：thisisveryunlikely。Howdoeshisworshipknow？Cananyjudge，howeverenlightened，telltheexactroadthatamanwilltake，whohasjustmissedacoupofmurder，andispursuedbyamanwhoisfiringpistolsathim？Andhasajudgearighttoinstructajuryinthisway，astowhattheyshall，orshallnot，believe？

Youhavetorunafteranactiveman，whohasthestartofyou：tojumpoutofacarriage。totakeyourpistols。andTHEN，yourhammer。THISISIMPOSSIBLE。Byheavens！doesitnotmakeaman’sbloodboil，toreadsuchblundering，blood-seekingsophistry？Thisman，whenitsuitshim，showsthatReywouldbeslowinhismotions。andwhenitsuitshim，declaresthatReyoughttobequick。declaresexcathedra，whatpaceReyshouldgo，andwhatdirectionheshouldtake。shows，inabreath，thathemusthaverunfasterthanPeytel。andthen，thathecouldnotrunfast，becausethecloakcloggedhim。settleshowheistobedressedwhenhecommitsamurder，andwhatmoneyheistohaveinhispocket。givestheseimpossiblesuppositionstothejury，andtellsthemthatthepreviousstatementsareimpossible。and，finally，informsthemoftheprecisemannerinwhichReymusthavestoodholdinghishorse-

clothinonehand，hiswhipandpistolintheother，whenhemadethesupposedattemptatmurder。Now，whatisthesizeofahorse-

cloth？Isitasbigasapocket-handkerchief？Istherenopossibilitythatitmighthangoveroneshoulder。thatthewhipshouldbeheldunderthatveryarm？Didyouneverseeacartersocarryit，hishandsinhispocketsallthewhile？Isitmonstrous，abhorrenttonature，thatamanshouldfireapistolfromunderacloakonarainyday？——thatheshould，afterfiringtheshot，befrightened，andrun。runstraightbeforehim，withthecloakonhisshoulders，andtheweaponinhishand？Peytel’sstoryispossible，andverypossible。itisalmostprobable。AllowthatReyhadtheclothon，andyouallowthathemusthavebeencloggedinhismotions。thatPeytelmayhavecomeupwithhim——felledhimwithablowofthehammer。thedoctorssaythathewouldhavesofallenbyoneblow——hewouldhavefallenonhisface，ashewasfound：thepapermighthavebeenthrustintohisbreast，andtumbledoutashefell。Circumstancesfarmoreimpossiblehaveoccurrederethis。

andmenhavebeenhangedforthem，whowereasinnocentofthecrimelaidtotheirchargeasthejudgeonthebench，whoconvictedthem。

Inlikemanner，Peytelmaynothavecommittedthecrimechargedtohim。andMr。Judge，withhisargumentsastopossibilitiesandimpossibilities，——Mr。PublicProsecutor，withhisromanticnarrativeandinflammatoryharanguestothejury，——mayhaveusedallthesepowerstobringtodeathaninnocentman。Fromtheanimuswithwhichthecasehadbeenconductedfrombeginningtoend，itwaseasytoseetheresult。Hereitis，inthewordsoftheprovincialpaper：——

BOURG，28October，1839。

ThecondemnedPeytelhasjustundergonehispunishment，whichtookplacefourdaysbeforetheanniversaryofhiscrime。TheterribledramaofthebridgeofAndert，whichcostthelifeoftwopersons，hasjustterminatedonthescaffold。Mid-dayhadjustsoundedontheclockofthePalais：thesameclocktolledmidnightwhen，onthe30thofAugust，hissentencewaspronounced。

SincetherejectionofhisappealinCassation，onwhichhisprincipalhopeswerefounded，PeytelspokelittleofhispetitiontotheKing。Thenotionoftransportationwasthatwhichheseemedtocherishmost。However，hemadeseveralinquiriesfromthegaoleroftheprison，whenhesawhimatmeal-time，withregardtotheplaceofexecution，theusualhour，andotherdetailsonthesubject。Fromthatperiod，thewords’ChampdeFoire’(thefair-

field，wheretheexecutionwastobeheld)，werefrequentlyusedbyhiminconversation。

Yesterday，theideathatthetimehadarrivedseemedtobemorestronglythaneverimpresseduponhim。especiallyafterthedepartureofthecure，wholatterlyhasbeenwithhimeveryday。

Thedocumentsconnectedwiththetrialhadarrivedinthemorning。

Hewasignorantofthiscircumstance，butsoughttodiscoverfromhisguardianswhattheytriedtohidefromhim。andtofindoutwhetherhispetitionwasrejected，andwhenhewastodie。

Yesterday，also，hehadwrittentodemandthepresenceofhiscounsel，M。Margerand，inorderthathemighthavesomeconversationwithhim，andregulatehisaffairs，beforehe。hedidnotwritedowntheword，butleftinitsplaceafewpointsofthepen。

Intheevening，whilsthewasatsupper，hebeggedearnestlytobeallowedalittlewax-candle，tofinishwhathewaswriting：

otherwise，hesaid，TIMEMIGHTFAIL。Thiswasanew，indirectmannerofrepeatinghisordinaryquestion。Aslight，uptothatevening，hadbeenrefusedhim，itwasthoughtbesttodenyhiminthis，asinformerinstances。otherwisehissuspicionsmighthavebeenconfirmed。Thekeeperrefusedhisdemand。

Thismorning，Monday，atnineo’clock，theGreffieroftheAssizeCourt，infulfilmentofthepainfuldutywhichthelawimposesuponhim，cametotheprison，incompanywiththecureofBourg，andannouncedtotheconvictthathispetitionwasrejected，andthathehadonlythreehourstolive。Hereceivedthisfatalnewswithagreatdealofcalmness，andshowedhimselftobenomoreaffectedthanhehadbeenonthetrial。’Iamready。butIwishtheyhadgivenmefour-and-twentyhours’notice，’——wereallthewordsheused。

TheGreffiernowretired，leavingPeytelalonewiththecure，whodidnotthenceforthquithim。Peytelbreakfastedatteno’clock。

Ateleven，apiquetofmountedgendarmerieandinfantrytooktheirstationupontheplacebeforetheprison，whereagreatconcourseofpeoplehadalreadyassembled。Anopencarwasatthedoor。

BeforehewentoutPeytelaskedthegaolerforalooking-glass。

andhavingexaminedhisfaceforamoment，said，’Atleast，theinhabitantsofBourgwillseethatIhavenotgrownthin。’

Astwelveo’clocksounded，theprisongatesopened，anaideappeared，followedbyPeytel，leaningonthearmofthecure。

Peytel’sfacewaspale，hehadalongblackbeard，abluecaponhishead，andhisgreat-coatflungoverhisshoulders，andbuttonedattheneck。

Helookedaboutattheplaceandthecrowd。heaskedifthecarriagewouldgoatatrot。andonbeingtoldthatthatwouldbedifficult，hesaidhewouldpreferwalking，andaskedwhattheroadwas。Heimmediatelysetout，walkingatafirmandrapidpace。Hewasnotboundatall。

Animmensecrowdofpeopleencumberedthetwostreetsthroughwhichhehadtopasstotheplaceofexecution。Hecasthiseyesalternatelyuponthemandupontheguillotine，whichwasbeforehim。

Arrivedatthefootofthescaffold，Peytelembracedthecure，andbadehimadieu。Hethenembracedhimagain。perhaps，forhismotherandsister。Hethenmountedthestepsrapidly，andgavehimselfintothehandsoftheexecutioner，whoremovedhiscoatandcap。Heaskedhowhewastoplacehimself，andonasignbeingmade，heflunghimselfbrisklyontheplank，andstretchedhisneck。Inanothermomenthewasnomore。

Thecrowd，whichhadbeenquitesilent，retired，profoundlymovedbythesightithadwitnessed。Asatallexecutions，therewasaverygreatnumberofwomenpresent。

Underthescaffoldtherehadbeen，eversincethemorning，acoffin。Thefamilyhadaskedforhisremains，andhadthemimmediatelyburied，privately：andthustheunfortunateman’sheadescapedthemodellersinwax，severalofwhomhadarrivedtotakeanimpressionofit。

Downgoestheaxe。thepoorwretch’sheadrollsgaspingintothebasket。thespectatorsgohome，pondering。andMr。Executionerandhisaideshave，inhalfanhour，removedalltracesoftheaugustsacrifice，andofthealtaronwhichithadbeenperformed。Say，Mr。Briefless，doyouthinkthatanysingleperson，meditatingmurder，wouldbedeterredtherefrombybeholdingthis——nay，athousandmoreexecutions？Itisnotformoralimprovement，asI

takeit，norforopportunitytomakeappropriateremarksuponthepunishmentofcrime，thatpeoplemakeaholidayofakilling-day，andleavetheirhomesandoccupations，toflockandwitnessthecuttingoffofahead。DowecrowdtoseeMr。Macreadyinthenewtragedy，orMademoiselleEllsslerinherlastnewballetandflesh-

coloredstockinnetpantaloons，outofapureloveofabstractpoetryandbeauty。orfromastrongnotionthatweshallbeexcited，indifferentways，bytheactorandthedancer？Andso，aswegotohaveamealoffictitiousterroratthetragedy，ofsomethingmorequestionableintheballet，wegoforaglutofbloodtotheexecution。Thelustisineveryman’snature，moreorless。Didyoueverwitnessawrestlingorboxingmatch？Thefirstclatterofthekickontheshins，orthefirstdrawingofblood，makesthestrangershudderalittle。butsoonthebloodishischiefenjoyment，andhethirstsforitwithafiercedelight。Itisafinegrimpleasurethatwehaveinseeingamankilled。andI

makenodoubtthattheorgansofdestructivenessmustbegintothrobandswellaswewitnessthedelightfulsavagespectacle。

Threeorfouryearsback，whenFieschiandLacenairewereexecuted，Imadeattemptstoseetheexecutionofboth。butwasdisappointedinbothcases。Inthefirstinstance，thedayforFieschi’sdeathwas，purposely，keptsecret。andhewas，ifIrememberrightly，executedatsomeremotequarterofthetown。Butitwouldhavedoneaphilanthropistgood，towitnessthescenewhichwesawonthemorningwhenhisexecutiondidNOTtakeplace。

Itwascarnivaltime，andtherumorhadprettygenerallybeencarriedabroadthathewastodieonthatmorning。Afriend，whoaccompaniedme，camemanymiles，throughthemudanddark，inordertobeinatthedeath。Wesetoutbeforelight，flounderingthroughthemuddyChampsElysees。where，besides，weremanyotherpersonsfloundering，andallbentuponthesameerrand。WepassedbytheConcertofMusard，thenheldintheRueSt。Honore。androundthis，inthewet，anumberofcoacheswerecollected。Theballwasjustup，andacrowdofpeopleinhideousmasquerade，drunk，tired，dirty，dressedinhorribleoldfrippery，anddaubedwithfilthyrouge，weretroopingoutoftheplace：tipsywomenandmen，shrieking，jabbering，gesticulating，asFrenchwilldo。

partiesswaggering，staggeringforwards，arminarm，reelingtoandfroacrossthestreet，andyellingsongsinchorus：hundredsofthesewereboundfortheshow，andwethoughtourselvesluckyinfindingavehicletotheexecutionplace，attheBarriered’Enfer。

AswecrossedtheriverandenteredtheEnferStreet，crowdsofstudents，blackworkmen，andmoredrunkendevilsfrommorecarnivalballs，werefillingit。andonthegrandplacetherewerethousandsoftheseassembled，lookingoutforFiaschiandhiscortege。Wewaitedandwaited。butalas！nofunforusthatmorning：nothroat-

cutting。noaugustspectacleofsatisfiedjustice。andtheeagerspectatorswereobligedtoreturn，disappointedoftheirexpectedbreakfastofblood。Itwouldhavebeenafinescene，thatexecution，coulditbuthavetakenplaceinthemidstofthemadmountebanksandtipsystrumpetswhohadflockedsofartowitnessit，wishingtowindupthedelightsoftheircarnivalbyabonneboucheofamurder。

Theotherattemptwasequallyunfortunate。WearrivedtoolateonthegroundtobepresentattheexecutionofLacenaireandhisco-

mateinmurder，Avril。Butaswecametotheground(agloomyroundspace，withinthebarrier——threeroadsleadtoit。and，outside，youseethewine-shopsandrestaurateurs’ofthebarrierlookinggayandinviting，)——aswecametotheground，weonlyfound，inthemidstofit，alittlepoolofice，justpartiallytingedwithred。Twoorthreeidlestreet-boysweredancingandstampingaboutthispool。andwhenIaskedoneofthemwhethertheexecutionhadtakenplace，hebegandancingmoremadlythanever，andshriekedoutwithaloudfantastical，theatricalvoice，VeneztousMessieursetDames，voyezicilesangdumonstreLacenaire，etdesoncompagnonhetraitreAvril，orwordstothateffect。andstraightwayalltheothergaminsscreamedoutthewordsinchorus，andtookhandsanddancedroundthelittlepuddle。

OaugustJustice，yourmealwasfollowedbyaprettyappropriategrace！Wasanyman，whosawtheshow，deterred，orfrightened，ormoralizedinanyway？Hehadgratifiedhisappetiteforblood，andthiswasall。Thereissomethingsingularlypleasing，bothintheamusementofexecution-seeing，andintheresults。Youarenotonlydelightfullyexcitedatthetime，butmostpleasinglyrelaxedafterwards。themind，whichhasbeenwounduppainfullyuntilnow，becomesquitecomplacentandeasy。Thereissomethingagreeableinthemisfortunesofothers，asthephilosopherhastoldus。Remarkwhatagoodbreakfastyoueatafteranexecution。howpleasantitistocutjokesafterit，anduponit。Thismerry，pleasantmoodisbroughtonbythebloodtonic。

But，forGod’ssake，ifwearetoenjoythis，letusdosoinmoderation。andletus，atleast，besureofaman’sguiltbeforewemurderhim。Tokillhim，evenwiththefullassurancethatheisguiltyishazardousenough。Whogaveyoutherighttodoso？——

you，whocryoutagainstsuicides，asimpiousandcontrarytoChristianlaw？Whatuseisthereinkillinghim？Youdeternooneelsefromcommittingthecrimebysodoing：yougiveus，tobesure，halfanhour’spleasantentertainment。butitisagreatquestionwhetherwederivemuchmoralprofitfromthesight。Ifyouwanttokeepamurdererfromfartherinroadsuponsociety，aretherenotplentyofhulksandprisons，Godwot。treadmills，galleys，andhousesofcorrection？Aboveall，asinthecaseofSebastianPeytelandhisfamily，therehavebeentwodeathsalready。wasathirddeathabsolutelynecessary？and，takingthefallibilityofjudgesandlawyersintohisheart，andrememberingthethousandinstancesofunmeritedpunishmentthathavebeensuffered，uponsimilarandstrongerevidencebefore，cananymandeclare，positivelyanduponhisoath，thatPeytelwasguilty，andthatthiswasnotTHETHIRDMURDERINTHEFAMILY？

FOURIMITATIONSOFBERANGER

LEROID’YVETOT。

Iletaitunroid’Yvetot，Peuconnudansl’histoire。

Selevanttard，secouchanttot，Dormantfortbiensansgloire，EtcouronneparJeannetonD’unsimplebonnetdecoton，Dit-on。

Oh！oh！oh！oh！ah！ah！ah！ah！

Quelbonpetitroic’etaitla！

La，la。

IlfesaitsesquatrerepasDanssonpalaisdechaume，Etsurunane，pasapas，Parcouraitsonroyaume。

Joyeux，simpleetcroyantlebien，Pourtoutegardeiln’avaitrienQu’unchien。

Oh！oh！oh！oh！ah！ah！ah！ah！&c。

La，la。

Iln’avaitdegoutonereuxQu’unesoifunpeuvive。

Mais，enrendantsonpeupleheureux，Ilfauxbienqu’unroivive。

Lui-memeatable，etsanssuppot，SurchaquemuidlevaitunpotD’impot。

Oh！oh！oh！oh！ah！ah！ah！ah！&c。

La，la。

AuxfillesdebonnesmaisonsCommeilavaitsuplaire，SessujetsavaientcentraisonsDelenommerleurpere：

D’ailleursilnelevaitdebanQuepourtirerquatrefoisl’anAublanc。

Oh！oh！oh！oh！ah！ah！ah！ah！&c。

La，la。

Iln’agranditpointsesetats，Futunvoisincommode，Et，modeledespotentats，Pritleplaisirpourcode。

Cen’estquelorsqu’ilexpira，Quelepeuplequil’enterraPleura。

Oh！oh！oh！oh！ah！ah！ah！ah！&c。

La，la。

OnconserveencorleportraitDecedigneetbonprince。

C’estl’enseigned’uncabaretFameuxdanslaprovince。

Lesjoursdefete，biensouvent，Lafoules’ecrieenbuvantDevant：

Oh！oh！oh！oh！ah！ah！ah！ah！

Quelbonpetitroic’etaitla！

La，la。

THEKINGOFYVETOT。

TherewasakingofYvetot，Ofwhomrenownhathlittlesaid，Wholetallthoughtsofglorygo，Anddawdledhalfhisdaysa-bed。

Andeverynight，asnightcameround，ByJenny，withanightcapcrowned，Sleptverysound：

Singho，ho，ho！andhe，he，he！

That’sthekindofkingforme。

Andeverydayitcametopass，Thatfourlustymealsmadehe。

And，stepbystep，uponanass，Rodeabroad，hisrealmstosee。

Andwhereverhedidstir，Whatthinkyouwashisescort，sir？

Why，anoldcur。

Singho，ho，ho！&c。

Ife’erhewentintoexcess，’Twasfromasomewhatlivelythirst。

Buthewhowouldhissubjectsbless，Odd’sfish！——mustwethiswhistlefirst。

Andsofromeverycasktheygot，Ourkingdidtohimselfallot，Atleastapot。

Singho，ho！&c。

Toalltheladiesoftheland，Acourteousking，andkind，washe。

Thereasonwhyyou’llunderstand，TheynamedhimPaterPatriae。

Eachyearhecalledhisfightingmen，Andmarchedaleaguefromhome，andthenMarchedbackagain。

Singho，ho！&c。

Neitherbyforcenorfalsepretence，Hesoughttomakehiskingdomgreat，Andmade(Oprinces，learnfromhence)，——

Liveandletlive，hisruleofstate。

’Twasonlywhenhecametodie，Thathispeoplewhostoodby，Wereknowntocry。

Singho，ho！&c。

TheportraitofthisbestofkingsIsextantstill，uponasignThatonavillagetavernswings，Famedinthecountryforgoodwine。

ThepeopleintheirSundaytrim，Fillingtheirglassestothebrim，Lookuptohim，Singingha，ha，ha！andhe，he，he！

That’sthesortofkingforme。

THEKINGOFBRENTFORD。

ANOTHERVERSION。

TherewasakinginBrentford，——ofwhomnolegendstell，Butwho，withouthisglory，——couldeatandsleeprightwell。

HisPolly’scottonnightcap，——itwashiscrownofstate，Hesleptofeveningsearly，——androseofmorningslate。

Allinafinemudpalace，——eachdayhetookfourmeals，Andforaguardofhonor，——adogranathisheels，Sometimes，toviewhiskingdoms，——rodeforththismonarchgood，Andthenaprancingjackass——heroyallybestrode。

Therewerenocostlyhabits——withwhichthiskingwascurst，Except(andwhere’stheharmon’t？)——asomewhatlivelythirst。

Butpeoplemustpaytaxes，——andkingsmusthavetheirsport，Sooutofeverygallon——HisGracehetookaquart。

Hepleasedtheladiesroundhim，——withmannerssoftandbland。

Withreasongood，theynamedhim，——thefatherofhisland。

Eachyearhismightyarmies——marchedforthingallantshow。

Theirenemiesweretargets——theirbulletstheyweretow。

Hevexednoquietneighbor，——nouselessconquestmade，Butbythelawsofpleasure，——hispeacefulrealmheswayed。

Andintheyearshereigned，——throughallthiscountrywide，Therewasnocauseforweeping，——savewhenthegoodmandied。

ThefaithfulmenofBrentford，——dostilltheirkingdeplore，Hisportraityetisswinging，——besideanalehousedoor。

Andtopers，tender-hearted，——regardhishonestphiz，Andenvytimesdeparted——thatknewareignlikehis。

LEGRENIER。

Jeviensrevoirl’asileoumajeunesseDelamisereasubileslecons。

J’avaisvingtans，unefollemaitresse，Defrancsamisetl’amourdeschansonsBravantlemondeetlessotsetlessages，Sansavenir，richedemonprintemps，Lesteetjoyeuxjemontaissixetages。

Dansungrenierqu’onestbienavingtans！

C’estungrenier，pointneveuxqu’onl’ignore。

Lafutmonlit，bienchetifetbiendur。

Lafutmatable。etjeretrouveencoreTroispiedsd’unverscharbonnessurlemur。

Apparaissez，plaisirsdemonbelage，Qued’uncoupd’aileafustigesletemps，Vingtfoispourvousj’aimismamontreengage。

Dansungrenierqu’onestbienavingtans！

Lisetteicidoitsurtoutapparaitre，Vive，jolie，avecunfraischapeau。

Dejasamainal’etroitefenetreSuspendsonschal，enguisederideau。

Sarobeaussivaparermacouchette。

Respecte，Amour，sesplislongsetflottans。

J’aisudepuisquipayaitsatoilette。

Dansungrenierqu’onestbienavingtans！

Atableunjour，jourdegranderichesse，Demesamislesvoixbrillaientenchoeur，Quandjusqu’icimonteuncrid’allegresse：

AMarengoBonaparteestvainqueur。

Lecanongronde。unautrechantcommence。

Nouscelebronstantdefaitseclatans。

Lesroisjamaisn’envahirontlaFrance。

Dansungrenierqu’onestbienavingtans！

Quittonscetoitoumaraisons’enivre。

Oh！qu’ilssontloincesjourssiregrettes！

J’echangeraiscequ’ilmeresteavivreContreundesmoisqu’iciDieum’acomptes，Pourrevergloire，amour，plaisir，folie，Pourdepensersavieenpeud’instans，D’unlongespoirpourlavoirembellie，Dansungrenierqu’onestbienavingtans！

THEGARRET。

WithpensiveeyesthelittleroomIview，Where，inmyyouth，Iweathereditsolong。

Withawildmistress，astanchfriendortwo，Andalightheartstillbreakingintosong：

Makingamockoflife，andallitscares，Richinthegloryofmyrisingsun，LightlyIvaultedupfourpairofstairs，InthebravedayswhenIwastwenty-one。

Yes。’tisagarret——lethimknow’twhowill——

Therewasmybed——fullharditwasandsmall。

Mytablethere——andIdecipherstillHalfalamecoupletcharcoaledonthewall。

Yejoys，thatTimehathsweptwithhimaway，Cometomineeyes，yedreamsofloveandfun。

ForyouIpawnedmywatchhowmanyaday，InthebravedayswhenIwastwenty-one。

AndseemylittleJessy，firstofall。

Shecomeswithpoutinglipsandsparklingeyes：

Behold，howroguishlyshepinshershawlAcrossthenarrowcasement，curtain-wise。

Nowbythebedherpetticoatglidesdown，Andwhendidwomanlooktheworseinnone？

Ihaveheardsincewhopaidformanyagown，InthebravedayswhenIwastwenty-one。

Onejollyevening，whenmyfriendsandI

Madehappymusicwithoursongsandcheers，Ashoutoftriumphmountedupthushigh，Anddistantcannonopenedonourears：

Werise，——wejoininthetriumphantstrain，——

Napoleonconquers——Austerlitziswon——

Tyrantsshallnevertreadusdownagain，InthebravedayswhenIwastwenty-one。

Letusbegone——theplaceissadandstrange——

Howfar，faroff，thesehappytimesappear。

AllthatIhavetoliveI’dgladlychangeForonesuchmonthasIhavewastedhere——

Todrawlongdreamsofbeauty，love，andpower，Fromfountsofhopethatneverwilloutrun，Anddrinkalllife’squintessenceinanhour，GivemethedayswhenIwastwenty-one！

ROGER-BONTEMPS。

AuxgensatrabilairesPourexempledonne，EnuntempsdemiseresRoger-Bontempsestne。

Vivreobscurasaguise，Narguerlesmecontens：

Ehgai！c’estladeviseDugrosRoger-Bontemps。

DuchapeaudesonpereCoiffedanslegrandsjours，DerosesoudelierreLerajeunirtoujours。

Mettreunmanteaudebure，Vieilamidevingtans。

Ehgai！c’estlaparureDugrosRoger-Bontemps。

PossederdanssahutteUnetable，unvieuxlit，Descartes，uneflute，UnbrocqueDieuremplit。

Unportraitdemaitresse，Uncoffreetriendedans。

Ehgai！c’estlarichesseDugrosRoger-Bontemps。

AuxenfansdelavilleMontrerdepetitsjeux。

EtrefesseurhabileDecontesgraveleux。

NeparlerquededanseEtd’almanachschantans。

Ehgai！c’estlascienceDugrosRoger-Bontemps。

Fautedevinsd’elite，Sablerceuxducanton：

PrefererMargueriteAuxdamesdugrandton：

DejoieetdetendresseRemplirtoussesinstans。

Ehgai！c’estlasagesseDugrosRoger-Bontemps。

Direauciel：Jemefie，Monpere，atabonte。

DemaphilosophiePardonnelegaiteQuemasaisonderniereSoitencoreunprintemps。

Ehgai！c’estlapriereDugrosRoger-Bontemps。

Vous，pauvrespleinsd’envie，Vous，richesdesireux，Vous，dontlechardevieApresuncoursheureux。

Vous，quiperdrezpeut-etreDestitreseclatans，Ehgai！prenezpourmaitreLegrosRogerBontemps。

JOLLYJACK。

WhenfiercepoliticaldebateThroughouttheislewasstorming，AndRadsattackedthethroneandstate，AndToriesthereforming，Tocalmthefuriousrageofeach，Andrightthelanddemented，HeavensentusJollyJack，toteachThewaytobecontented。

Jack’sbedwasstraw，’twaswarmandsoft，Hischair，athree-leggedstool。

Hisbrokenjugwasemptiedoft，Yet，somehow，alwaysfull。

Hismistress’portraitdeckedthewall，Hismirrorhadacrack。

Yet，gayandglad，thoughthiswasallHiswealth，livedJollyJack。

Togiveadvicetoavarice，Teachprideitsmeancondition，Andpreachgoodsensetodullpretence，WashonestJack’shighmission。

OursimplestatesmanfoundhisruleOfmoralintheflagon，AndheldhisphilosophicschoolBeneaththeGeorgeandDragon。

WhenvillageSolonscursedtheLords，Andcalledthemalt-taxsinful，Jackheedednottheirangrywords，Butsmiledanddrankhisskinful。

Andwhenmenwastedhealthandlife，Insearchofrankandriches，Jackmarked，aloof，thepaltrystrife，Andworehisthreadbarebreeches。

Ienternotthechurch，hesaid，ButI’llnotseektorobit。

SoworthyJackJoeMillerread，WhileothersstudiedCobbett。

Histalkitwasoffeastandfun。

HisguidetheAlmanack。

FromyouthtoagethusgaylyrunThelifeofJollyJack。

AndwhenJackprayed，asofthewould，HehumblythankedhisMaker。

Iam，saidhe，OFathergood！

NorCatholicnorQuaker：

Giveeachhiscreed，leteachproclaimHiscatalogueofcurses。

ItrustinThee，andnotinthem，InThee，andinThymercies！

Forgivemeif，midstallThyworks，NohintIseeofdamning。

Andthinkthere’sfaithamongtheTurks，Andhopefore’entheBrahmin。

Harmlessmymindis，andmymirth，Andkindlyismylaughter：

Icannotseethesmilingearth，Andthinkthere’shellhereafter。

Jackdied。heleftnolegacy，Savethathisstoryteaches：——

Contenttopeevishpoverty。

Humilitytoriches。

Yescornfulgreat，yeenvioussmall，Comefollowinhistrack。

Weallwerehappier，ifweallWouldcopyJOLLYJACK。

FRENCHDRAMASANDMELODRAMAS。

TherearethreekindsofdramainFrance，whichyoumaysubdivideasmuchasyouplease。

Thereistheoldclassicaldrama，wellnighdead，andfulltimetoo：

oldtragedies，inwhichhalfadozencharactersappear，andspoutsonorousAlexandrinesforhalfadozenhours。ThefairRachelhasbeentryingtorevivethisgenre，andtountombRacine。butbenotalarmed，Racinewillnevercometolifeagain，andcauseaudiencestoweepasofyore。MadameRachelcanonlygalvanizethecorpse，notrevivifyit。AncientFrenchtragedy，red-heeled，patched，andbe-periwigged，liesinthegrave。anditisonlytheghostofitthatwesee，whichthefairJewesshasraised。Thereareclassicalcomediesinverse，too，whereintheknavishvalets，rakishheroes，stolidoldguardians，andsmart，free-spokenserving-women，discourseinAlexandrines，asloudastheHoracesortheCid。AnEnglishmanwillseldomreconcilehimselftotheroulementoftheverses，andthepainfulrecurrenceoftherhymes。formypart，I

hadrathergotoMadameSaqui’sorseeDeburaudancingonarope：

hislinesarequiteasnaturalandpoetical。

Thenthereisthecomedyoftheday，ofwhichMonsieurScribeisthefather。Goodheavens！withwhatanumberofgaycolonels，smartwidows，andsillyhusbandshasthatgentlemanpeopledtheplay-books。Howthatunfortunateseventhcommandmenthasbeenmaltreatedbyhimandhisdisciples。Youwillseefourpieces，attheGymnase，ofanight。andsosureasyouseethem，fourhusbandsshallbewickedlyused。Whenisthisjoketocease？MonDieu！

Play-writershavehandleditforabouttwothousandyears，andthepublic，likeagreatbaby，musthavethetalerepeatedtoitoverandoveragain。

Finally，thereistheDrama，thatgreatmonsterwhichhassprungintolifeoflateyears。andwhichissaid，butIdon’tbelieveawordofit，tohaveShakspeareforafather。IfMonsieurScribe’splaysmaybesaidtobesomanyingeniousexampleshowtobreakonecommandment，thedrameisagrandandgeneralchaosofthemall。

nay，severalcrimesareadded，notprohibitedintheDecalogue，whichwaswrittenbeforedramaswere。Ofthedrama，VictorHugoandDumasarethewell-knownandrespectableguardians。EverypieceVictorHugohaswritten，sinceHernani，hascontainedamonster——adelightfulmonster，savedbyonevirtue。ThereisTriboulet，afoolishmonster。LucreceBorgia，amaternalmonster。

MaryTudor，areligiousmonster。MonsieurQuasimodo，ahumpbackmonster。andothers，thatmightbenamed，whosemonstrositiesweareinducedtopardon——nay，admiringlytowitness——becausetheyareagreeablymingledwithsomeexquisitedisplayofaffection。And，asthegreatHugohasonemonstertoeachplay，thegreatDumashas，ordinarily，halfadozen，towhommurderisnothing。commonintrigue，andsimplebreakageofthebefore-mentionedcommandment，nothing。butwholiveandmoveinavast，delightfulcomplicationofcrime，thatcannotbeeasilyconceivedinEngland，muchlessdescribed。

WhenIthinkoverthenumberofcrimesthatIhaveseenMademoiselleGeorges，forinstance，commit，Iamfilledwithwonderathergreatness，andthegreatnessofthepoetswhohaveconceivedthesecharminghorrorsforher。Ihaveseenhermakeloveto，andmurder，hersons，intheTourdeNesle。Ihaveseenherpoisonacompanyofnolessthanninegentlemen，atFerrara，withanaffectionatesoninthenumber。Ihaveseenher，asMadamedeBrinvilliers，killoffnumbersofrespectablerelationsinthefirstfouracts。and，atthelast，beactuallyburnedatthestake，towhichshecomesshuddering，ghastly，barefooted，andinawhitesheet。Sweetexcitementoftendersympathies！Suchtragediesarenotsogoodasareal，downrightexecution。but，inpointofinterest，thenextthingtoit：withwhatanumberofmoralemotionsdotheyfillthebreast。

withwhatahatredforvice，andyetatruepityandrespectforthatgrainofvirtuethatistobefoundinusall：ourbloody，daughter-lovingBrinvilliers。ourwarmhearted，poisonousLucretiaBorgia。aboveall，whatasmartappetiteforacoolsupperafterwards，attheCafeAnglais，whenthehorrorsoftheplayactasapiquantsaucetothesupper！

Or，tospeakmoreseriously，andtocome，atlast，tothepoint。

AfterhavingseenmostofthegranddramaswhichhavebeenproducedatParisforthelasthalf-dozenyears，andthinkingoverallthatonehasseen，——thefictitiousmurders，rapes，adulteries，andothercrimes，bywhichonehasbeeninterestedandexcited，——amanmaytakeleavetobeheartilyashamedofthemannerinwhichhehasspenthistime。andofthehideouskindofmentalintoxicationinwhichhehaspermittedhimselftoindulge。

NoraresimplesocietyoutragestheonlysortofcrimeinwhichthespectatorofParisplayshaspermittedhimselftoindulge。hehasrecreatedhimselfwithadealofblasphemybesides，andhaspassedmanypleasanteveningsinbeholdingreligiondefiledandridiculed。

Allusionhasbeenmade，inaformerpaper，toafashionthatlatelyobtainedinFrance，andwhichwentbythenameofCatholicreaction。andas，inthishappycountry，fashioniseverything，wehavehadnotmerelyCatholicpicturesandquasireligiousbooks，butanumberofCatholicplayshavebeenproduced，veryedifyingtothefrequentersofthetheatresortheBoulevards，whohavelearnedmoreaboutreligionfromtheseperformancesthantheyhaveacquired，nodoubt，inthewholeoftheirlivesbefore。Inthecourseofaveryfewyearswehaveseen——TheWanderingJew。

Belshazzar’sFeast。Nebuchadnezzar：andtheMassacreoftheInnocents。JosephandhisBrethren。ThePassageoftheRedSea。andTheDeluge。

ThegreatDumas，likeMadameSandbeforementioned，hasbroughtavastquantityofreligionbeforethefoot-lights。TherewashisfamoustragedyofCaligula，which，beitspokentotheshameofthePariscritics，wascoldlyreceived。nay，actuallyhissed，bythem。Andwhy？Because，saysDumas，itcontainedagreatdealtoomuchpietyfortherogues。Thepublic，hesays，wasmuchmorereligious，andunderstoodhimatonce。

Asforthecritics，sayshe，nobly，letthosewhocriedoutagainsttheimmoralityofAntonyandMargueritedeBourgogne，reproachmeforTHECHASTITYOFMESSALINA。(ThisdearcreatureistheheroineoftheplayofCaligula。)Itmatterslittletome。

Thesepeoplehavebutseentheformofmywork：theyhavewalkedroundthetent，buthavenotseenthearchwhichitcovered。theyhaveexaminedthevasesandcandlesofthealtar，buthavenotopenedthetabernacle！

Thepublicalonehas，instinctively，comprehendedthattherewas，beneaththisoutwardsign，aninwardandmysteriousgrace：itfollowedtheactionofthepieceinallitsserpentinewindings。itlistenedforfourhours，withpiousattention(avecrecueillementetreligion)，tothesoundofthisrollingriverofthoughts，whichmayhaveappearedtoitnewandbold，perhaps，butchasteandgrave。anditretired，withitsheadonitsbreast，likeamanwhohadjustperceived，inadream，thesolutionofaproblemwhichhehaslongandvainlysoughtinhiswakinghours。

YouseethatnotonlySaintSandisanapostle，inherway。butSaintDumasisanother。WehavepeopleinEnglandwhowriteforbread，likeDumasandSand，andarepaidsomuchfortheirline。

buttheydon’tsetupforprophets。Mrs。Trollopehasneverdeclaredthathernovelsareinspiredbyheaven。Mr。Buckstonehaswrittenagreatnumberoffarces，andnevertalkedaboutthealtarandthetabernacle。EvenSirEdwardBulwer(who，onasimilaroccasion，whenthecriticsfoundfaultwithaplayofhis，answeredthembyaprettydecentdeclarationofhisownmerits，)neverventuredtosaythathehadreceivedadivinemission，andwasutteringfive-actrevelations。

Allthingsconsidered，thetragedyofCaligulaisadecenttragedy。asdecentasthedecentcharactersoftheheroandheroinecanallowittobe。itmaybealmostsaid，provokinglydecent：butthis，itmustberemembered，isthecharacteristicofthemodernFrenchschool(nay，oftheEnglishschooltoo)。andifthewritertakethecharacterofaremarkablescoundrel，itistentoonebutheturnsoutanamiablefellow，inwhomwehaveallthewarmestsympathy。Caligulaiskilledattheendoftheperformance。

Messalinaiscomparativelywell-behaved。andthesacredpartoftheperformance，thetabernacle-charactersapartfromthemerevase

andcandlestickpersonages，maybesaidtobedepictedinthepersonofaChristianconvert，Stella，whohashadthegoodfortunetobeconvertedbynolessapersonthanMaryMagdalene，whenshe，Stella，wasstayingonavisittoheraunt，nearNarbonne。

STELLA(Continuant。)VoilaQuejevoiss’avancer，sanspiloteetsansrames，Unebarqueportantdeuxhommesetdeuxfemmes，Et，spectacleinouiquimeravitencor，Tousquatreavaientaufrontuneaureoled’orD’oupartaientdesrayonsdesivivelumiereQuejefusobligeeabaisserlapaupiere。

Et，lorsquejerouvrislesyeuxaveceffroi，Lesvoyageursdivinsetaientaupresdemoi。

Unjourdechacund’euxetdanstoutesagloireJeteraconterailamarveilleusehistoire，Ettul’adoreras，j’espere。encemoment，Mamere，iltesuffitdesavoirseulementQuetousquatrevenaientdufonddelaSyrie：

Uneditlesavaitbannisdeleurpatrie，Et，sefaisantbourreaux，deshommesirrites，Sansavirons，sanseau，sanspainetgarrotes，Surunefrelebarqueechoueeaurivage，Lesavaientalamerpoussesdansunorage。

Maisapeinel’esquifeut-iltouchelesflotsQu’aucantiquechanteparlessaintsmatelots，L’ouraganrepliasesailesfremissantes，Quelameraplanitsesvaguesmugissantes，Etqu’unsoleilpluspur，reparaissantauxcieux，Enveloppal’esquifd’uncercleradieux！……

JUNIA——Maisc’etaitunprodige。

STELLA——Unmiracle，mamere！

Leursferstomberentseuls，l’eaucessad’etreamere，EtdeuxfoischaquejourlebateaufutcouvertD’unemannepareilleacelledudesert：

C’estainsique，poussesparunemainceleste，Jelesvisaborder。

JUNIA——Oh！disvitelereste！

STELLA——Al’aube，troisd’entreeuxquitterentlamaison：

MarthepritlecheminquimeneaTarascon，LazareetMaximinceluideMassilie，Etcellequiresta……C’ETAITLAPLUSJOLIE，(howtrulyFrench！)

Nousfaisantappelerverslemilieudujour，Demandasilesmontsoulesboisd’alentourCachaientquelqueretraiteinconnueetprofonde，Quilaputsepareratoutjamaisdumonde……

Aquilasesouvintqu’ilavaitpenetreDansunantresauvageetdetousignore，GrottecreuseeauxflancsdecesAlpessublimes，Oul’aiglefaitsonaireau-dessusdesabimes。

Iloffritcetasile，etdeslelendemainTousdeux，pourl’yguider，nousetionsenchemin。

Lesoirdusecondjournoustouchamessabase：

La，tombantagenouxdansunesainteextase，Elleprialong-temps，puisversl’antreinconnu，Denouantsechaussure，ellemarchapiednu。

Nosprieres，noscrisresterentsansreponses：

Aumilieudescailloux，desepines，desronces，Nouslavimesmonter，unbatonalamain，Etcen’estqu’arriveeautermeduchemin，Qu’enfinelletombasansforceetsanshaleine……

JUNIA——Commentlanommait-on，mafille？

STELLA——Madeleine。

Walking，saysStella，bythesea-shore，Abarkdrewnear，thathadnorsailnoroar。twowomenandtwomenthevesselbore：eachofthatcrew，’twaswondroustobehold，woreroundhisheadaringofblazinggold。fromwhichsuchradianceglitteredallaround，thatI

wasfaintolooktowardstheground。AndwhenoncemoreIraisedmyfrightenedeyne，beforemestoodthetravellersdivine。theirrank，thegloriouslotthateachbefell，atbetterseason，mother，willItell。Ofthisanon：thetimewillcomewhenthoushaltlearntoworshipasIworshipnow。Sufficeit，thatfromSyria’slandtheycame。anedictfromtheircountrybanishedthem。Fierce，angrymenhadseizeduponthefour，andlaunchedtheminthatvesselfromtheshore。Theylaunchedthesevictimsonthewatersrude。norruddergavetosteer，norbreadforfood。Asthedoomedvesselcleavesthestormymain，thatpiouscrewupliftsasacredstrain。theangrywavesaresilentasitsings。thestorm，awe-

stricken，foldsitsquiveringwings。Apurersunappearstheheavenstolight，andwrapsthelittlebarkinradiancebright。

JUNIA——Sure，’twasaprodigy。

STELLA——Amiracle。Spontaneousfromtheirhandsthefettersfell。Thesaltsea-wavegrewfresh，and，twiceaday，manna(likethatwhichonthedesertlay)coveredthebarkandfedthemontheirway。Thus，hitherled，atheaven’sdivinebehest，Isawthemland——

JUNIA——Mydaughter，telltherest。

STELLA——Threeofthefour，ourmansionleftatdawn。One，Martha，tooktheroadtoTarascon。LazarusandMaximintoMassily。

butoneremained(thefairestofthethree)，whoaskedus，ifi’

thewoodsormountainsnear，therechancedtobesomecavernloneanddrear。whereshemighthide，forever，fromallmen。Itchanced，mycousinknewofsuchaden。deephiddeninamountain’shoarybreast，onwhichtheeaglebuildshisairynest。Andthitherofferedhethesainttoguide。Nextdayuponthejourneyforthwehied。andcame，atthesecondeve，withwearypace，untothelonelymountain’sruggedbase。Heretheworntraveller，fallingonherknee，didprayawhileinsacredecstasy。and，drawingoffhersandalsfromherfeet，marched，naked，towardsthatdesolateretreat。Noanswermadeshetoourcriesorgroans。butwalkingmidstthepricklesandrudestones，astaffinhand，wesawherupwardstoil。noreverdidshepause，norrestthewhile，saveattheentryofthatsavageden。Here，powerlessandpanting，fellshethen。

JUNIA——Whatwashername，mydaughter？

STELLA。MAGDALEN。

Herethetranslatormustpause——havingnoinclinationtoenterthetabernacle，incompanywithsuchaspotlesshigh-priestasMonsieurDumas。

SomethingtabernacularmaybefoundinDumas’sfamouspieceofDonJuandeMarana。Thepoethaslaidthesceneofhisplayinavastnumberofplaces：inheaven(wherewehavetheVirginMaryandlittleangels，inblue，swingingcensersbeforeher！)——onearth，undertheearth，andinaplacestilllower，butnotmentionabletoearspolite。andtheplot，asitappearsfromadialoguebetweenagoodandabadangel，withwhichtheplaycommences，turnsuponacontestbetweenthesetwoworthiesforthepossessionofthesoulofamemberofthefamilyofMarana。

DonJuandeMarananotonlyresembleshisnamesake，celebratedbyMozartandMoliere，inhispeculiarsuccessesamongtheladies，butpossessesfurtherqualitieswhichrenderhischaractereminentlyfittingforstagerepresentation：heunitesthevirtuesofLovelaceandLacenaire。heblasphemesuponalloccasions。hemurders，attheslightestprovocation，andwithoutthemosttriflingremorse。heovercomesladiesofrigidvirtue，ladiesofeasyvirtue，andladiesofnovirtueatall。andthepoet，inspiredbythecontemplationofsuchacharacter，hasdepictedhishero’sadventuresandconversationwithwonderfulfeelingandtruth。

Thefirstactoftheplaycontainsahalf-dozenofmurdersandintrigues。whichwouldhavesufficedhumblergeniusthanM。

Dumas’s，forthecompletionof，atleast，halfadozentragedies。

Inthesecondactourheroflogshiselderbrother，andrunsawaywithhissister-in-law。inthethird，hefightsaduelwitharival，andkillshim：whereuponthemistressofhisvictimtakespoison，anddies，ingreatagonies，onthestage。Inthefourthact，DonJuan，havingenteredachurchforthepurposeofcarryingoffanun，withwhomheisinlove，isseizedbythestatueofoneoftheladieswhomhehaspreviouslyvictimized，andmadetobeholdtheghostsofallthoseunfortunatepersonswhosedeathshehascaused。

Thisisamostedifyingspectacle。Theghostsrisesolemnly，eachinawhitesheet，precededbyawax-candle。and，havingdeclaredtheirnamesandqualities，call，inchorus，forvengeanceuponDonJuan，asthus：——

DONSANDOVALloquitur。

IamDonSandovald’Ojedo。IplayedagainstDonJuanmyfortune，thetombofmyfathers，andtheheartofmymistress——Ilostall：

Iplayedagainsthimmylife，andIlostit。Vengeanceagainstthemurderer！vengeance！——(Thecandlegoesout。)

THECANDLEGOESOUT，andanangeldescends——aflamingswordinhishand——andasks：IstherenovoiceinfavorofDonJuan？whenlo！

DonJuan’sfather(likeoneofthoseingenioustoyscalledJack-

in-the-box，)jumpsupfromhiscoffin，anddemandsgraceforhisson。

WhenMarthathenunreturns，havingpreparedallthingsforherelopement，shefindsDonJuanfaintingupontheground——Iamnolongeryourhusband，sayshe，uponcomingtohimself。IamnolongerDonJuan。IamBrotherJuantheTrappist。SisterMartha，recollectthatyoumustdie！

ThiswasamostcruelblowuponSisterMartha，whoisnolessapersonthananangel，anangelindisguise——thegoodspiritofthehouseofMarana，whohasgonetothelengthoflosingherwingsandforfeitingherplaceinheaven，inordertokeepcompanywithDonJuanonearth，and，ifpossible，toconverthim。Already，inherangeliccharacter，shehadexhortedhimtorepentance，butinvain。

for，whileshestoodatoneelbow，pouringnotmerelyhints，butlongsermons，intohisear，attheotherelbowstoodabadspirit，grinningandsneeringatallherpiouscounsels，andobtainingbyfarthegreatershareoftheDon’sattention。

Inspite，however，oftheuttercontemptwithwhichDonJuantreatsher，——inspiteofhisdissolutecourses，whichmustshockhervirtue，——andhisimpoliteneglect，whichmustwoundhervanity，thepoorcreature(who，fromhavingbeenaccustomedtobettercompany，mighthavebeenpresumedtohavehadbettertaste)，theunfortunateangelfeelsacertaininclinationfortheDon，andactuallyfliesuptoheaventoaskpermissiontoremainwithhimonearth。

Andwhenthecurtaindrawsup，tothesoundofharps，anddiscoverswhite-robedangelswalkingintheclouds，wefindtheangelofMaranauponherknees，utteringthefollowingaddress：——

LEBONANGE。

Vierge，aquilecalicealaliqueuramereFutsisouventoffert，Mere，quel’onnommaladouloureusemere，Tantvousavezsouffert！

Vous，dontlesyeuxdivinssurlaterredeshommesOntverseplusdepleursQuevospiedsn’ontdepuis，danslecielounoussommes，Faitecloredefleurs。

Vased’election，etoilematinale，Miroirdepurete，Vousquipriezpournous，d’unevoixvirginale，Lasupremebonte。

Amontour，aujourd’hui，bienheureuseMarie，Jetombeavosgenoux。

Daignezdoncm’ecouter，carc’estvousquejeprie，Vousquipriezpournous。

Whichmaybethusinterpreted：——

OVirginblest！bywhomthebitterdraughtSooftenhasbeenquaffed，That，forthysorrow，thouartnamedbyusTheMotherDolorous！

Thou，fromwhoseeyeshavefallenmoretearsofwoe，Upontheearthbelow，Than’neaththyfootsteps，inthisheavenofours，Haverisenflowers！

Obeamingmorningstar！Ochosenvase！

Omirrorofallgrace！

Who，withthyvirginvoice，dosteverprayMan’ssinsaway。

Benddownthineear，andlist，Oblessedsaint！

Untomysadcomplaint。

Mother！totheeIkneel，ontheeIcall，Whohearestall。

Sheproceedstorequestthatshemaybeallowedtoreturntoearth，andfollowthefortunesofDonJuan。and，asthereisonedifficulty，or，touseherownwords，——

Mais，commevoussavezqu’auxvouteseternelles，Malgremoi，tendmonvol，Soufflezsurmonetoileetdetachezmesailes，Pourm’enchainerausol。

herrequestisgranted，herstarisBLOWNOUT(Opoeticallusion！)

andshedescendstoearthtolove，andtogomad，andtodieforDonJuan！

Thereaderwillrequirenofurtherexplanation，inordertobesatisfiedastothemoralofthisplay：butisitnotaverybittersatireuponthecountry，whichcallsitselfthepolitestnationintheworld，thattheincidents，theindecency，thecoarseblasphemy，andthevulgarwitofthispiece，shouldfindadmirersamongthepublic，andprocurereputationfortheauthor？CouldnottheGovernment，whichhasre-established，inamanner，thetheatricalcensorship，andforbidsoraltersplayswhichtouchonpolitics，exertthesameguardianshipoverpublicmorals？ThehonestEnglishreader，whohasafaithinhisclergyman，andisaregularattendantatSundayworship，willnotbealittlesurprisedatthemarchofintellectamongourneighborsacrosstheChannel，andatthekindofconsiderationinwhichtheyholdtheirreligion。Hereisamanwhoseizesuponsaintsandangels，merelytoputsentimentsintheirmouthswhichmightsuitanymphofDruryLane。Heshowsheaven，inorderthathemaycarrydebauchintoit。andavailshimselfofthemostsacredandsublimepartsofourcreedasavehicleforascene-painter’sskill，oranoccasionforahandsomeactresstowearanewdress。

M。Dumas’spieceofKeanisnotquitesosublime。itwasbroughtoutbytheauthorasasatireupontheFrenchcritics，who，totheircreditbeitspoken，hadgenerallyattackedhim，andwasintendedbyhim，andreceivedbythepublic，asafaithfulportraitureofEnglishmanners。Assuch，itmeritsspecialobservationandpraise。InthefirstactyoufindaCountessandanAmbassadress，whoseconversationrelatespurelytothegreatactor。AlltheladiesinLondonareinlovewithhim，especiallythetwopresent。AsfortheAmbassadress，sheprefershimtoherhusband(amatterofcourseinallFrenchplays)，andtoamoreseducingpersonstill——nolessapersonthanthePrinceofWales！

whopresentlywaitsontheladies，andjoinsintheirconversationconcerningKean。Thisman，sayshisRoyalHighness，istheverypinkoffashion。Brummellisnobodywhencomparedtohim。andI

myselfonlyaninsignificantprivategentleman。Hehasareputationamongladies，forwhichIsighinvain。andspendsanincometwiceasgreatasmine。ThisadmirablehistorictouchatoncepaintstheactorandthePrince。theestimationinwhichtheonewasheld，andthemodesteconomyforwhichtheotherwassonotorious。

ThenwehaveKean，ataplacecalledtheTroudeCharbon，theCoalHole，where，totheedificationofthepublic，heengagesinafistycombatwithanotoriousboxer。Thisscenewasreceivedbytheaudiencewithloudexclamationsofdelight，andcommentedon，bythejournals，asafaultlesspictureofEnglishmanners。TheCoalHolebeingonthebanksoftheThames，anobleman——LORD

MELBOURN！——haschosenthetavernasarendezvousforagangofpirates，whoaretohavetheirshipinwaiting，inordertocarryoffayoungladywithwhomhislordshipisenamored。ItneednotbesaidthatKeanarrivesatthenickoftime，savestheinnocentMeessAnna，andexposestheinfamyofthePeer。Aviolenttiradeagainstnoblemenensues，andLordMelbournslinksaway，disappointed，tomeditaterevenge。Kean’striumphscontinuethroughalltheacts：

theAmbassadressfallsmadlyinlovewithhim。thePrincebecomesfuriousathisillsuccess，andtheAmbassadordreadfullyjealous。

TheypursueKeantohisdressing-roomatthetheatre。where，unluckily，theAmbassadressherselfhastakenrefuge。Dreadfulquarrelsensue。thetragediangrowssuddenlymaduponthestage，andsocruellyinsultsthePrinceofWalesthathisRoyalHighnessdeterminestosendHIMTOBOTANYBAY。Hissentence，however，iscommutedtobanishmenttoNewYork。whither，ofcourse，MissAnnaaccompanieshim。rewardinghim，previously，withherhandandtwentythousandayear！

ThiswonderfulperformancewasgravelyreceivedandadmiredbythepeopleofParis：thepiecewasconsideredtobedecidedlymoral，becausethepopularcandidatewasmadetotriumphthroughout，andtotriumphinthemostvirtuousmanner。for，accordingtotheFrenchcodeofmorals，successamongwomenis，atonce，theproofandtherewardofvirtue。

ThesacredpersonageintroducedinDumas’splaybehindacloud，figuresbodilyinthepieceoftheMassacreoftheInnocents，representedatParislastyear。Sheappearsunderadifferentname，butthecostumeisexactlythatofCarloDolce’sMadonna。andaningeniousfableisarranged，theinterestofwhichhangsuponthegrandMassacreoftheInnocents，perpetratedinthefifthact。