第8章

CHAPTERXXI

Marywalkedtotheneareststationandreachedhomeinanincrediblyshortspaceoftime，justsomuch，indeed，aswasneededfortheintelligentunderstandingofthenewsoftheworldasthe“WestminsterGazette“reportedit。Withinafewminutesofopeningherdoor，shewasintrimforahardevening\'swork。Sheunlockedadrawerandtookoutamanuscript，whichconsistedofaveryfewpages，entitled，inaforciblehand，“SomeAspectsoftheDemocraticState。“Theaspectsdwindledoutinacries-crossofblottedlinesintheverymiddleofasentence，andsuggestedthattheauthorhadbeeninterrupted，orconvincedofthefutilityofproceeding，withherpenintheair……Oh，yes，Ralphhadcomeinatthatpoint。Shescoredthatsheetveryeffectively，and，choosingafreshone，beganatagreatratewithageneralizationuponthestructureofhumansociety，whichwasagooddealbolderthanhercustom。Ralphhadtoldheroncethatshecouldn\'twriteEnglish，whichaccountedforthosefrequentblotsandinsertions；butsheputallthatbehindher，anddroveaheadwithsuchwordsascameherway，untilshehadaccomplishedhalfapageofgeneralizationandmightlegitimatelydrawbreath。Directlyherhandstoppedherbrainstoppedtoo，andshebegantolisten。Apaper-boyshouteddownthestreet；anomnibusceasedandlurchedonagainwiththeheaveofdutyoncemoreshouldered；thedullnessofthesoundssuggestedthatafoghadrisensinceherreturn，if，indeed，afoghaspowertodeadensound，ofwhichfact，shecouldnotbesureatthepresentmoment。ItwasthesortoffactRalphDenhamknew。Atanyrate，itwasnoconcernofhers，andshewasabouttodipapenwhenherearwascaughtbythesoundofastepuponthestonestaircase。

ShefolloweditpastMr。Chippen\'schambers；pastMr。Gibson\'s；pastMr。Turner\'s；afterwhichitbecamehersound。Apostman，awasherwoman，acircular，abill——shepresentedherselfwitheachoftheseperfectlynaturalpossibilities；but，tohersurprise，hermindrejectedeachoneofthemimpatiently，evenapprehensively。Thestepbecameslow，asitwasapttodoattheendofthesteepclimb，andMary，listeningfortheregularsound，wasfilledwithanintolerablenervousness。Leaningagainstthetable，shefelttheknockofherheartpushherbodyperceptiblybackwardsandforwards——astateofnervesastonishingandreprehensibleinastablewoman。Grotesquefanciestookshape。Alone，atthetopofthehouse，anunknownpersonapproachingnearerandnearer——howcouldsheescape？Therewasnowayofescape。Shedidnotevenknowwhetherthatoblongmarkontheceilingwasatrap-doortotheroofornot。Andifshegotontotheroof——well，therewasadropofsixtyfeetorsoontothepavement。

Butshesatperfectlystill，andwhentheknocksounded，shegotupdirectlyandopenedthedoorwithouthesitation。Shesawatallfigureoutside，withsomethingominoustohereyesinthelookofit。

“Whatdoyouwant？“shesaid，notrecognizingthefaceinthefitfullightofthestaircase。

“Mary？I\'mKatharineHilbery！“

Mary\'sself-possessionreturnedalmostexcessively，andherwelcomewasdecidedlycold，asifshemustrecoupherselfforthisridiculouswasteofemotion。Shemovedhergreen-shadedlamptoanothertable，andcovered“SomeAspectsoftheDemocraticState“withasheetofblotting-paper。

“Whycan\'ttheyleavemealone？“shethoughtbitterly，connectingKatharineandRalphinaconspiracytotakefromhereventhishourofsolitarystudy，eventhispoorlittledefenceagainsttheworld。And，asshesmootheddownthesheetofblotting-paperoverthemanuscript，shebracedherselftoresistKatharine，whosepresencestruckher，notmerelybyitsforce，asusual，butassomethinginthenatureofamenace。

“You\'reworking？“saidKatharine，withhesitation，perceivingthatshewasnotwelcome。

“Nothingthatmatters，“Maryreplied，drawingforwardthebestofthechairsandpokingthefire。

“Ididn\'tknowyouhadtoworkafteryouhadlefttheoffice，“saidKatharine，inatonewhichgavetheimpressionthatshewasthinkingofsomethingelse，aswas，indeed，thecase。

Shehadbeenpayingcallswithhermother，andinbetweenthecallsMrs。Hilberyhadrushedintoshopsandboughtpillow-casesandblotting-booksonnoperceptiblemethodforthefurnishingofKatharine\'shouse。Katharinehadasenseofimpedimentaaccumulatingonallsidesofher。Shehadleftheratlength，andhadcomeontokeepanengagementtodinewithRodneyathisrooms。Butshedidnotmeantogettohimbeforeseveno\'clock，andsohadplentyoftimetowalkallthewayfromBondStreettotheTempleifshewishedit。Theflowoffacesstreamingoneithersideofherhadhypnotizedherintoamoodofprofounddespondency，towhichherexpectationofaneveningalonewithRodneycontributed。Theywereverygoodfriendsagain，betterfriends，theybothsaid，thaneverbefore。Sofarasshewasconcernedthiswastrue。Thereweremanymorethingsinhimthanshehadguesseduntilemotionbroughtthemforth——strength，affection，sympathy。Andshethoughtofthemandlookedatthefacespassing，andthoughthowmuchaliketheywere，andhowdistant，nobodyfeelinganythingasshefeltnothing，anddistance，shethought，layinevitablybetweentheclosest，andtheirintimacywastheworstpresenceofall。For，“Ohdear，“shethought，lookingintoatobacconist\'swindow，“Idon\'tcareforanyofthem，andIdon\'tcareforWilliam，andpeoplesaythisisthethingthatmattersmost，andI

can\'tseewhattheymeanbyit。“

Shelookeddesperatelyatthesmooth-bowledpipes，andwondered——

shouldshewalkonbytheStrandorbytheEmbankment？Itwasnotasimplequestion，foritconcernednotdifferentstreetssomuchasdifferentstreamsofthought。IfshewentbytheStrandshewouldforceherselftothinkouttheproblemofthefuture，orsomemathematicalproblem；ifshewentbytherivershewouldcertainlybegintothinkaboutthingsthatdidn\'texist——theforest，theoceanbeach，theleafysolitudes，themagnanimoushero。No，no，no！A

thousandtimesno！——itwouldn\'tdo；therewassomethingrepulsiveinsuchthoughtsatpresent；shemusttakesomethingelse；shewasoutofthatmoodatpresent。AndthenshethoughtofMary；thethoughtgaveherconfidence，evenpleasureofasadsort，asifthetriumphofRalphandMaryprovedthatthefaultofherfailurelaywithherselfandnotwithlife。AnindistinctideathatthesightofMarymightbeofhelp，combinedwithhernaturaltrustinher，suggestedavisit；

for，surely，herlikingwasofakindthatimpliedlikinguponMary\'ssidealso。Afteramoment\'shesitationshedecided，althoughsheseldomacteduponimpulse，toactuponthisone，andturneddownasidestreetandfoundMary\'sdoor。Butherreceptionwasnotencouraging；clearlyMarydidn\'twanttoseeher，hadnohelptoimpart，andthehalf-formeddesiretoconfideinherwasquenchedimmediately。Shewasslightlyamusedatherowndelusion，lookedratherabsent-minded，andswungherglovestoandfro，asifdolingoutthefewminutesaccuratelybeforeshecouldsaygood-by。

ThosefewminutesmightverywellbespentinaskingforinformationastotheexactpositionoftheSuffrageBill，orinexpoundingherownverysensibleviewofthesituation。Buttherewasatoneinhervoice，orashadeinheropinions，oraswingofhergloveswhichservedtoirritateMaryDatchet，whosemannerbecameincreasinglydirect，abrupt，andevenantagonistic。ShebecameconsciousofawishtomakeKatharinerealizetheimportanceofthiswork，whichshediscussedsocoolly，asthoughshe，too，hadsacrificedwhatMaryherselfhadsacrificed。Theswingingoftheglovesceased，andKatharine，aftertenminutes，begantomakemovementspreliminarytodeparture。Atthesightofthis，Marywasaware——shewasabnormallyawareofthingsto-night——ofanotherverystrongdesire；Katharinewasnottobeallowedtogo，todisappearintothefree，happyworldofirresponsibleindividuals。Shemustbemadetorealize——tofeel。

“Idon\'tquitesee，“shesaid，asifKatharinehadchallengedherexplicitly，“how，thingsbeingastheyare，anyonecanhelptrying，atleast，todosomething。“

“No。ButhowAREthings？“

Marypressedherlips，andsmiledironically；shehadKatharineathermercy；shecould，ifsheliked，dischargeuponherheadwagon-loadsofrevoltingproofofthestateofthingsignoredbythecasual，theamateur，thelooker-on，thecynicalobserveroflifeatadistance。

Andyetshehesitated。Asusual，whenshefoundherselfintalkwithKatharine，shebegantofeelrapidalternationsofopinionabouther，arrowsofsensationstrikingstrangelythroughtheenvelopeofpersonality，whichsheltersussoconvenientlyfromourfellows。Whatanegoist，howaloofshewas！Andyet，notinherwords，perhaps，butinhervoice，inherface，inherattitude，thereweresignsofasoftbroodingspirit，ofasensibilityunbluntedandprofound，playingoverherthoughtsanddeeds，andinvestinghermannerwithanhabitualgentleness。TheargumentsandphrasesofMr。Clactonfellflatagainstsucharmor。

“You\'llbemarried，andyou\'llhaveotherthingstothinkof，“shesaidinconsequently，andwithanaccentofcondescension。ShewasnotgoingtomakeKatharineunderstandinasecond，asshewould，allsheherselfhadlearntatthecostofsuchpain。No。Katharinewastobehappy；Katharinewastobeignorant；Marywastokeepthisknowledgeoftheimpersonallifeforherself。Thethoughtofhermorning\'srenunciationstungherconscience，andshetriedtoexpandoncemoreintothatimpersonalconditionwhichwassoloftyandsopainless。Shemustcheckthisdesiretobeanindividualagain，whosewisheswereinconflictwiththoseofotherpeople。Sherepentedofherbitterness。

Katharinenowrenewedhersignsofleave-taking；shehaddrawnononeofhergloves，andlookedaboutherasifinsearchofsometrivialsayingtoendwith。Wasn\'ttheresomepicture，orclock，orchestofdrawerswhichmightbesingledoutfornotice？somethingpeaceableandfriendlytoendtheuncomfortableinterview？Thegreen-shadedlampburntinthecorner，andilluminedbooksandpensandblotting-paper。

Thewholeaspectoftheplacestartedanothertrainofthoughtandstruckherasenviablyfree；insucharoomonecouldwork——onecouldhavealifeofone\'sown。

“Ithinkyou\'reverylucky，“sheobserved。“Ienvyyou，livingaloneandhavingyourownthings“——andengagedinthisexaltedway，whichhadnorecognitionorengagement-ring，sheaddedinherownmind。

Mary\'slipspartedslightly。ShecouldnotconceiveinwhatrespectsKatharine，whospokesincerely，couldenvyher。

“Idon\'tthinkyou\'vegotanyreasontoenvyme，“shesaid。

“Perhapsonealwaysenviesotherpeople，“Katharineobservedvaguely。

“Well，butyou\'vegoteverythingthatanyonecanwant。“

Katharineremainedsilent。Shegazedintothefirequietly，andwithoutatraceofself-consciousness。ThehostilitywhichshehaddivinedinMary\'stonehadcompletelydisappeared，andsheforgotthatshehadbeenuponthepointofgoing。

“Well，IsupposeIhave，“shesaidatlength。“AndyetIsometimesthink——“Shepaused；shedidnotknowhowtoexpresswhatshemeant。

“ItcameovermeintheTubetheotherday，“sheresumed，withasmile；“whatisitthatmakesthesepeoplegoonewayratherthantheother？It\'snotlove；it\'snotreason；Ithinkitmustbesomeidea。

Perhaps，Mary，ouraffectionsaretheshadowofanidea。Perhapsthereisn\'tanysuchthingasaffectioninitself……“Shespokehalf-mockingly，askingherquestion，whichshescarcelytroubledtoframe，notofMary，orofanyoneinparticular。

ButthewordsseemedtoMaryDatchetshallow，supercilious，cold-blooded，andcynicalallinone。Allhernaturalinstinctswererousedinrevoltagainstthem。

“I\'mtheoppositewayofthinking，yousee，“shesaid。

“Yes；Iknowyouare，“Katharinereplied，lookingatherasifnowshewereabout，perhaps，toexplainsomethingveryimportant。

MarycouldnothelpfeelingthesimplicityandgoodfaiththatlaybehindKatharine\'swords。

“Ithinkaffectionistheonlyreality，“shesaid。

“Yes，“saidKatharine，almostsadly。SheunderstoodthatMarywasthinkingofRalph，andshefeltitimpossibletopresshertorevealmoreofthisexaltedcondition；shecouldonlyrespectthefactthat，insomefewcases，lifearrangeditselfthussatisfactorilyandpasson。Sherosetoherfeetaccordingly。ButMaryexclaimed，withunmistakableearnestness，thatshemustnotgo；thattheymetsoseldom；thatshewantedtotalktohersomuch……Katharinewassurprisedattheearnestnesswithwhichshespoke。ItseemedtoherthattherecouldbenoindiscretioninmentioningRalphbyname。

Seatingherself“fortenminutes，“shesaid:“Bytheway，Mr。DenhamtoldmehewasgoingtogiveuptheBarandliveinthecountry。Hashegone？Hewasbeginningtotellmeaboutit，whenwewereinterrupted。“

“Hethinksofit，“saidMarybriefly。Thecoloratoncecametoherface。

“Itwouldbeaverygoodplan，“saidKatharineinherdecidedway。

“Youthinkso？“

“Yes，becausehewoulddosomethingworthwhile；hewouldwriteabook。Myfatheralwayssaysthathe\'sthemostremarkableoftheyoungmenwhowriteforhim。“

Marybentlowoverthefireandstirredthecoalbetweenthebarswithapoker。Katharine\'smentionofRalphhadrousedwithinheranalmostirresistibledesiretoexplaintoherthetruestateofthecasebetweenherselfandRalph。Sheknew，fromthetoneofhervoice，thatinspeakingofRalphshehadnodesiretoprobeMary\'ssecrets，ortoinsinuateanyofherown。Moreover，shelikedKatharine；shetrustedher；shefeltarespectforher。Thefirststepofconfidencewascomparativelysimple；butafurtherconfidencehadrevealeditself，asKatharinespoke，whichwasnotsosimple，andyetitimpresseditselfuponherasanecessity；shemusttellKatharinewhatitwasclearthatshehadnoconceptionof——shemusttellKatharinethatRalphwasinlovewithher。

“Idon\'tknowwhathemeanstodo，“shesaidhurriedly，seekingtimeagainstthepressureofherownconviction。“I\'venotseenhimsinceChristmas。“

Katharinereflectedthatthiswasodd；perhaps，afterall，shehadmisunderstoodtheposition。Shewasinthehabitofassuming，however，thatshewasratherunobservantofthefinershadesoffeeling，andshenotedherpresentfailureasanotherproofthatshewasapractical，abstract-mindedperson，betterfittedtodealwithfiguresthanwiththefeelingsofmenandwomen。Anyhow，WilliamRodneywouldsayso。

“Andnow——“shesaid。

“Oh，pleasestay！“Maryexclaimed，puttingoutherhandtostopher。

DirectlyKatharinemovedshefelt，inarticulatelyandviolently，thatshecouldnotbeartolethergo。IfKatharinewent，heronlychanceofspeakingwaslost；heronlychanceofsayingsomethingtremendouslyimportantwaslost。HalfadozenwordsweresufficienttowakeKatharine\'sattention，andputflightandfurthersilencebeyondherpower。Butalthoughthewordscametoherlips，herthroatcloseduponthemanddrovethemback。Afterall，sheconsidered，whyshouldshespeak？Becauseitisright，herinstincttoldher；righttoexposeoneselfwithoutreservationstootherhumanbeings。Sheflinchedfromthethought。Itaskedtoomuchofonealreadystrippedbare。Somethingshemustkeepofherown。Butifshedidkeepsomethingofherown？

Immediatelyshefiguredanimmuredlife，continuingforanimmenseperiod，thesamefeelingslivingforever，neitherdwindlingnorchangingwithintheringofathickstonewall。Theimaginationofthislonelinessfrightenedher，andyettospeak——toloseherloneliness，forithadalreadybecomedeartoher，wasbeyondherpower。

HerhandwentdowntothehemofKatharine\'sskirt，and，fingeringalineoffur，shebentherheadasiftoexamineit。

“Ilikethisfur，“shesaid，“Ilikeyourclothes。Andyoumustn\'tthinkthatI\'mgoingtomarryRalph，“shecontinued，inthesametone，“becausehedoesn\'tcareformeatall。Hecaresforsomeoneelse。“

Herheadremainedbent，andherhandstillrestedupontheskirt。

“It\'sashabbyolddress，“saidKatharine，andtheonlysignthatMary\'swordshadreachedherwasthatshespokewithalittlejerk。

“Youdon\'tmindmytellingyouthat？“saidMary，raisingherself。

“No，no，“saidKatharine；“butyou\'remistaken，aren\'tyou？“Shewas，intruth，horriblyuncomfortable，dismayed，indeed，disillusioned。Shedislikedtheturnthingshadtakenquiteintensely。Theindecencyofitafflictedher。Thesufferingimpliedbythetoneappalledher。ShelookedatMaryfurtively，witheyesthatwerefullofapprehension。

Butifshehadhopedtofindthatthesewordshadbeenspokenwithoutunderstandingoftheirmeaning，shewasatoncedisappointed。Marylaybackinherchair，frowningslightly，andlooking，Katharinethought，asifshehadlivedfifteenyearsorsointhespaceofafewminutes。

“Therearesomethings，don\'tyouthink，thatonecan\'tbemistakenabout？“Marysaid，quietlyandalmostcoldly。“Thatiswhatpuzzlesmeaboutthisquestionofbeinginlove。I\'vealwayspridedmyselfuponbeingreasonable，“sheadded。“Ididn\'tthinkIcouldhavefeltthis——Imeaniftheotherpersondidn\'t。Iwasfoolish。Iletmyselfpretend。“Hereshepaused。“For，yousee，Katharine，“sheproceeded，rousingherselfandspeakingwithgreaterenergy，“IAMinlove。

There\'snodoubtaboutthat……I\'mtremendouslyinlove……withRalph。“Thelittleforwardshakeofherhead，whichshookalockofhair，togetherwithherbrightercolor，gaveheranappearanceatonceproudanddefiant。

Katharinethoughttoherself，“That\'showitfeelsthen。“Shehesitated，withafeelingthatitwasnotforhertospeak；andthensaid，inalowtone，“You\'vegotthat。“

“Yes，“saidMary；“I\'vegotthat。Onewouldn\'tNOTbeinlove……

ButIdidn\'tmeantotalkaboutthat；Ionlywantedyoutoknow。

There\'sanotherthingIwanttotellyou……“Shepaused。“Ihaven\'tanyauthorityfromRalphtosayit；butI\'msureofthis——he\'sinlovewithyou。“

Katharinelookedatheragain，asifherfirstglancemusthavebeendeluded，for，surely，theremustbesomeoutwardsignthatMarywastalkinginanexcited，orbewildered，orfantasticmanner。No；shestillfrowned，asifshesoughtherwaythroughtheclausesofadifficultargument，butshestilllookedmorelikeonewhoreasonsthanonewhofeels。

“Thatprovesthatyou\'remistaken——utterlymistaken，“saidKatharine，speakingreasonably，too。Shehadnoneedtoverifythemistakebyaglanceatherownrecollections，whenthefactwassoclearlystampeduponhermindthatifRalphhadanyfeelingtowardsheritwasoneofcriticalhostility。Shedidnotgivethematteranotherthought，andMary，nowthatshehadstatedthefact，didnotseektoproveit，buttriedtoexplaintoherself，ratherthantoKatharine，hermotivesinmakingthestatement。

Shehadnervedherselftodowhatsomelargeandimperiousinstinctdemandedherdoing；shehadbeensweptonthebreastofawavebeyondherreckoning。

“I\'vetoldyou，“shesaid，“becauseIwantyoutohelpme。Idon\'twanttobejealousofyou。AndIam——I\'mfearfullyjealous。Theonlyway，Ithought，wastotellyou。“

Shehesitated，andgropedinherendeavortomakeherfeelingscleartoherself。

“IfItellyou，thenwecantalk；andwhenI\'mjealous，Icantellyou。AndifI\'mtemptedtodosomethingfrightfullymean，Icantellyou；youcouldmakemetellyou。Ifindtalkingsodifficult；butlonelinessfrightensme。Ishouldshutitupinmymind。Yes，that\'swhatI\'mafraidof。Goingaboutwithsomethinginmymindallmylifethatneverchanges。Ifinditsodifficulttochange。WhenIthinkathing\'swrongIneverstopthinkingitwrong，andRalphwasquiteright，Isee，whenhesaidthatthere\'snosuchthingasrightandwrong；nosuchthing，Imean，asjudgingpeople——“

“RalphDenhamsaidthat？“saidKatharine，withconsiderableindignation。InordertohaveproducedsuchsufferinginMary，itseemedtoherthathemusthavebehavedwithextremecallousness。Itseemedtoherthathehaddiscardedthefriendship，whenitsuitedhisconveniencetodoso，withsomefalselyphilosophicaltheorywhichmadehisconductalltheworse。Shewasgoingontoexpressherselfthus，hadnotMaryatonceinterruptedher。

“No，no，“shesaid；“youdon\'tunderstand。Ifthere\'sanyfaultit\'smineentirely；afterall，ifonechoosestorunrisks——“

Hervoicefalteredintosilence。Itwasborneinuponherhowcompletelyinrunningherriskshehadlostherprize，lostitsoentirelythatshehadnolongertheright，intalkingofRalph，topresumethatherknowledgeofhimsupplantedallotherknowledge。Shenolongercompletelypossessedherlove，sincehisshareinitwasdoubtful；andnow，tomakethingsyetmorebitter，herclearvisionofthewaytofacelifewasrenderedtremulousanduncertain，becauseanotherwaswitnessofit。Feelingherdesirefortheoldunsharedintimacytoogreattobebornewithouttears，sherose，walkedtothefartherendoftheroom，heldthecurtainsapart，andstoodtheremasteredforamoment。Thegriefitselfwasnotignoble；thestingofitlayinthefactthatshehadbeenledtothisactoftreacheryagainstherself。Trapped，cheated，robbed，firstbyRalphandthenbyKatharine，sheseemedalldissolvedinhumiliation，andbereftofanythingshecouldcallherown。Tearsofweaknesswelledupandrolleddownhercheeks。Buttears，atleast，shecouldcontrol，andwouldthisinstant，andthen，turning，shewouldfaceKatharine，andretrievewhatcouldberetrievedofthecollapseofhercourage。

Sheturned。Katharinehadnotmoved；shewasleaningalittleforwardinherchairandlookingintothefire。SomethingintheattituderemindedMaryofRalph。Sohewouldsit，leaningforward，lookingratherfixedlyinfrontofhim，whilehismindwentfaraway，exploring，speculating，untilhebrokeoffwithhis，“Well，Mary？“——

andthesilence，thathadbeensofullofromancetoher，gavewaytothemostdelightfultalkthatshehadeverknown。

Somethingunfamiliarintheposeofthesilentfigure，somethingstill，solemn，significantaboutit，madeherholdherbreath。Shepaused。Herthoughtswerewithoutbitterness。Shewassurprisedbyherownquietandconfidence。Shecamebacksilently，andsatoncemorebyKatharine\'sside。Maryhadnowishtospeak。Inthesilencesheseemedtohavelostherisolation；shewasatoncethesuffererandthepitifulspectatorofsuffering；shewashappierthanshehadeverbeen；shewasmorebereft；shewasrejected，andshewasimmenselybeloved。Attempttoexpressthesesensationswasvain，and，moreover，shecouldnothelpbelievingthat，withoutanywordsonherside，theywereshared。Thusforsometimelongertheysatsilent，sidebyside，whileMaryfingeredthefurontheskirtoftheolddress。

CHAPTERXXII

ThefactthatshewouldbelateinkeepingherengagementwithWilliamwasnottheonlyreasonwhichsentKatharinealmostatracingspeedalongtheStrandinthedirectionofhisrooms。Punctualitymighthavebeenachievedbytakingacab，hadshenotwishedtheopenairtofanintoflametheglowkindledbyMary\'swords。Foramongalltheimpressionsoftheevening\'stalkonewasofthenatureofarevelationandsubduedtheresttoinsignificance。Thusonelooked；

thusonespoke；suchwaslove。

“Shesatupstraightandlookedatme，andthenshesaid，\'I\'minlove，\'“Katharinemused，tryingtosetthewholesceneinmotion。Itwasascenetodwellonwithsomuchwonderthatnotagrainofpityoccurredtoher；itwasaflameblazingsuddenlyinthedark；byitslightKatharineperceivedfartoovividlyforhercomfortthemediocrity，indeedtheentirelyfictitiouscharacterofherownfeelingssofarastheypretendedtocorrespondwithMary\'sfeelings。

Shemadeuphermindtoactinstantlyupontheknowledgethusgained，andcasthermindinamazementbacktothesceneupontheheath，whenshehadyielded，heavenknowswhy，forreasonswhichseemednowimperceptible。Soinbroaddaylightonemightrevisittheplacewhereonehasgropedandturnedandsuccumbedtoutterbewildermentinafog。

“It\'sallsosimple，“shesaidtoherself。“Therecan\'tbeanydoubt。

I\'veonlygottospeaknow。I\'veonlygottospeak，“shewentonsaying，intimetoherownfootsteps，andcompletelyforgotMaryDatchet。

WilliamRodney，havingcomebackearlierfromtheofficethanheexpected，satdowntopickoutthemelodiesin“TheMagicFlute“uponthepiano。Katharinewaslate，butthatwasnothingnew，and，asshehadnoparticularlikingformusic，andhefeltinthemoodforit，perhapsitwasaswell。ThisdefectinKatharinewasthemorestrange，Williamreflected，because，asarule，thewomenofherfamilywereunusuallymusical。Hercousin，CassandraOtway，forexample，hadaveryfinetasteinmusic，andhehadcharmingrecollectionsofherinalightfantasticattitude，playingthefluteinthemorning-roomatStogdonHouse。Herecalledwithpleasuretheamusingwayinwhichhernose，longlikealltheOtwaynoses，seemedtoextenditselfintotheflute，asifsheweresomeinimitablygracefulspeciesofmusicalmole。Thelittlepicturesuggestedveryhappilyhermelodiousandwhimsicaltemperament。TheenthusiasmsofayounggirlofdistinguishedupbringingappealedtoWilliam，andsuggestedathousandwaysinwhich，withhistrainingandaccomplishments，hecouldbeofservicetoher。Sheoughttobegiventhechanceofhearinggoodmusic，asitisplayedbythosewhohaveinheritedthegreattradition。Moreover，fromoneortworemarksletfallinthecourseofconversation，hethoughtitpossiblethatshehadwhatKatharineprofessedtolack，apassionate，ifuntaught，appreciationofliterature。Hehadlentherhisplay。Meanwhile，asKatharinewascertaintobelate，and“TheMagicFlute“isnothingwithoutavoice，hefeltinclinedtospendthetimeofwaitinginwritingalettertoCassandra，exhortinghertoreadPopeinpreferencetoDostoevsky，untilherfeelingforformwasmorehighlydeveloped。Hesethimselfdowntocomposethispieceofadviceinashapewhichwaslightandplayful，andyetdidnoinjurytoacausewhichhehadnearatheart，whenheheardKatharineuponthestairs。Amomentlateritwasplainthathehadbeenmistaken，itwasnotKatharine；buthecouldnotsettlehimselftohisletter。Histemperhadchangedfromoneofurbanecontentment——indeedofdeliciousexpansion——tooneofuneasinessandexpectation。Thedinnerwasbroughtin，andhadtobesetbythefiretokeephot。Itwasnowaquarterofanhourbeyondthespecifiedtime。Hebethoughthimofapieceofnewswhichhaddepressedhimintheearlierpartoftheday。Owingtotheillnessofoneofhisfellow-clerks，itwaslikelythathewouldgetnoholidayuntillaterintheyear，whichwouldmeanthepostponementoftheirmarriage。Butthispossibility，afterall，wasnotsodisagreeableastheprobabilitywhichforceditselfuponhimwitheverytickoftheclockthatKatharinehadcompletelyforgottenherengagement。SuchthingshadhappenedlessfrequentlysinceChristmas，butwhatiftheyweregoingtobegintohappenagain？Whatiftheirmarriageshouldturnout，asshehadsaid，afarce？Heacquittedherofanywishtohurthimwantonly，buttherewassomethinginhercharacterwhichmadeitimpossibleforhertohelphurtingpeople。Wasshecold？Wassheself-absorbed？Hetriedtofitherwitheachofthesedescriptions，buthehadtoownthatshepuzzledhim。

“Therearesomanythingsthatshedoesn\'tunderstand，“hereflected，glancingatthelettertoCassandrawhichhehadbegunandlaidaside。

Whatpreventedhimfromfinishingtheletterwhichhehadsomuchenjoyedbeginning？ThereasonwasthatKatharinemight，atanymoment，entertheroom。Thethought，implyinghisbondagetoher，irritatedhimacutely。Itoccurredtohimthathewouldleavetheletterlyingopenforhertosee，andhewouldtaketheopportunityoftellingherthathehadsenthisplaytoCassandraforhertocriticize。Possibly，butnotbyanymeanscertainly，thiswouldannoyher——andashereachedthedoubtfulcomfortofthisconclusion，therewasaknockonthedoorandKatharinecamein。Theykissedeachothercoldlyandshemadenoapologyforbeinglate。Nevertheless，hermerepresencemovedhimstrangely；buthewasdeterminedthatthisshouldnotweakenhisresolutiontomakesomekindofstandagainsther；togetatthetruthabouther。Helethermakeherowndispositionofclothesandbusiedhimselfwiththeplates。

“I\'vegotapieceofnewsforyou，Katharine，“hesaiddirectlytheysatdowntotable；“Ishan\'tgetmyholidayinApril。Weshallhavetoputoffourmarriage。“

Herappedthewordsoutwithacertaindegreeofbriskness。Katharinestartedalittle，asiftheannouncementdisturbedherthoughts。

“Thatwon\'tmakeanydifference，willit？Imeantheleaseisn\'tsigned，“shereplied。“Butwhy？Whathashappened？“

Hetoldher，inanoff-handway，howoneofhisfellow-clerkshadbrokendown，andmighthavetobeawayformonths，sixmonthseven，inwhichcasetheywouldhavetothinkovertheirposition。Hesaiditinawaywhichstruckher，atlast，asoddlycasual。Shelookedathim。

Therewasnooutwardsignthathewasannoyedwithher。Wasshewelldressed？Shethoughtsufficientlyso。Perhapsshewaslate？Shelookedforaclock。

“It\'sagoodthingwedidn\'ttakethehousethen，“sherepeatedthoughtfully。

“It\'llmean，too，I\'mafraid，thatIshan\'tbeasfreeforaconsiderabletimeasIhavebeen，“hecontinued。Shehadtimetoreflectthatshegainedsomethingbyallthis，thoughitwastoosoontodeterminewhat。Butthelightwhichhadbeenburningwithsuchintensityasshecamealongwassuddenlyoverclouded，asmuchbyhismannerasbyhisnews。Shehadbeenpreparedtomeetopposition，whichissimpletoencountercomparedwith——shedidnotknowwhatitwasthatshehadtoencounter。Themealpassedinquiet，well-controlledtalkaboutindifferentthings。Musicwasnotasubjectaboutwhichsheknewanything，butshelikedhimtotellherthings；andcould，shemused，ashetalked，fancytheeveningsofmarriedlifespentthus，overthefire；spentthus，orwithabook，perhaps，forthenshewouldhavetimetoreadherbooks，andtograspfirmlywitheverymuscleofherunusedmindwhatshelongedtoknow。Theatmospherewasveryfree。

SuddenlyWilliambrokeoff。Shelookedupapprehensively，brushingasidethesethoughtswithannoyance。

“WhereshouldIaddressalettertoCassandra？“heaskedher。ItwasobviousagainthatWilliamhadsomemeaningorotherto-night，orwasinsomemood。“We\'vestruckupafriendship，“headded。

“She\'sathome，Ithink，“Katharinereplied。

“Theykeephertoomuchathome，“saidWilliam。“Whydon\'tyouaskhertostaywithyou，andletherhearalittlegoodmusic？I\'lljustfinishwhatIwassaying，ifyoudon\'tmind，becauseI\'mparticularlyanxiousthatsheshouldhearto-morrow。“

Katharinesankbackinherchair，andRodneytookthepaperonhisknees，andwentonwithhissentence。“Style，youknow，iswhatwetendtoneglect——“；buthewasfarmoreconsciousofKatharine\'seyeuponhimthanofwhathewassayingaboutstyle。Heknewthatshewaslookingathim，butwhetherwithirritationorindifferencehecouldnotguess。

Intruth，shehadfallensufficientlyintohistraptofeeluncomfortablyrousedanddisturbedandunabletoproceedonthelineslaiddownforherself。Thisindifferent，ifnothostile，attitudeonWilliam\'spartmadeitimpossibletobreakoffwithoutanimosity，largelyandcompletely。InfinitelypreferablewasMary\'sstate，shethought，wheretherewasasimplethingtodoandonedidit。Infact，shecouldnothelpsupposingthatsomelittlenessofnaturehadapartinalltherefinements，reserves，andsubtletiesoffeelingforwhichherfriendsandfamilyweresodistinguished。Forexample，althoughshelikedCassandrawellenough，herfantasticmethodoflifestruckheraspurelyfrivolous；nowitwassocialism，nowitwassilkworms，nowitwasmusic——whichlastshesupposedwasthecauseofWilliam\'ssuddeninterestinher。NeverbeforehadWilliamwastedtheminutesofherpresenceinwritinghisletters。Withacurioussenseoflightopeningwhereall，hitherto，hadbeenopaque，itdawneduponherthat，afterall，possibly，yes，probably，nay，certainly，thedevotionwhichshehadalmostwearilytakenforgrantedexistedinamuchslighterdegreethanshehadsuspected，orexistednolonger。Shelookedathimattentivelyasifthisdiscoveryofhersmustshowtracesinhisface。

Neverhadsheseensomuchtorespectinhisappearance，somuchthatattractedherbyitssensitivenessandintelligence，althoughshesawthesequalitiesasiftheywerethoseonerespondsto，dumbly，inthefaceofastranger。Theheadbentoverthepaper，thoughtfulasusual，hadnowacomposurewhichseemedsomehowtoplaceitatadistance，likeafaceseentalkingtosomeoneelsebehindglass。

Hewroteon，withoutraisinghiseyes。Shewouldhavespoken，butcouldnotbringherselftoaskhimforsignsofaffectionwhichshehadnorighttoclaim。Theconvictionthathewasthusstrangetoherfilledherwithdespondency，andillustratedquitebeyonddoubttheinfinitelonelinessofhumanbeings。Shehadneverfeltthetruthofthissostronglybefore。Shelookedawayintothefire；itseemedtoherthatevenphysicallytheywerenowscarcelywithinspeakingdistance；andspirituallytherewascertainlynohumanbeingwithwhomshecouldclaimcomradeship；nodreamthatsatisfiedherasshewasusedtobesatisfied；nothingremainedinwhoserealityshecouldbelieve，savethoseabstractideas——figures，laws，stars，facts，whichshecouldhardlyholdtoforlackofknowledgeandakindofshame。

WhenRodneyownedtohimselfthefollyofthisprolongedsilence，andthemeannessofsuchdevices，andlookedupreadytoseeksomeexcuseforagoodlaugh，oropeningforaconfession，hewasdisconcertedbywhathesaw。Katharineseemedequallyobliviousofwhatwasbadorofwhatwasgoodinhim。Herexpressionsuggestedconcentrationuponsomethingentirelyremotefromhersurroundings。Thecarelessnessofherattitudeseemedtohimrathermasculinethanfeminine。Hisimpulsetobreakuptheconstraintwaschilled，andoncemoretheexasperatingsenseofhisownimpotencyreturnedtohim。HecouldnothelpcontrastingKatharinewithhisvisionoftheengaging，whimsicalCassandra；Katharineundemonstrative，inconsiderate，silent，andyetsonotablethathecouldneverdowithouthergoodopinion。

Sheveeredrounduponhimamomentlater，asif，whenhertrainofthoughtwasended，shebecameawareofhispresence。

“Haveyoufinishedyourletter？“sheasked。Hethoughtheheardfaintamusementinhertone，butnotatraceofjealousy。

“No，I\'mnotgoingtowriteanymoreto-night，“hesaid。“I\'mnotinthemoodforitforsomereason。Ican\'tsaywhatIwanttosay。“

“Cassandrawon\'tknowifit\'swellwrittenorbadlywritten，“

Katharineremarked。

“I\'mnotsosureaboutthat。Ishouldsayshehasagooddealofliteraryfeeling。“

“Perhaps，“saidKatharineindifferently。“You\'vebeenneglectingmyeducationlately，bytheway。Iwishyou\'dreadsomething。Letmechooseabook。“Sospeaking，shewentacrosstohisbookshelvesandbeganlookinginadesultorywayamonghisbooks。Anything，shethought，wasbetterthanbickeringorthestrangesilencewhichdrovehometoherthedistancebetweenthem。Asshepulledonebookforwardandthenanothershethoughtironicallyofherowncertaintynotanhourago；howithadvanishedinamoment，howshewasmerelymarkingtimeasbestshecould，notknowingintheleastwheretheystood，whattheyfelt，orwhetherWilliamlovedherornot。MoreandmoretheconditionofMary\'smindseemedtoherwonderfulandenviable——if，indeed，itcouldbequiteasshefiguredit——if，indeed，simplicityexistedforanyoneofthedaughtersofwomen。

“Swift，“shesaid，atlast，takingoutavolumeathaphazardtosettlethisquestionatleast。“LetushavesomeSwift。“

Rodneytookthebook，helditinfrontofhim，insertedonefingerbetweenthepages，butsaidnothing。Hisfaceworeaqueerexpressionofdeliberation，asifhewereweighingonethingwithanother，andwouldnotsayanythinguntilhismindweremadeup。

Katharine，takingherchairbesidehim，notedhissilenceandlookedathimwithsuddenapprehension。Whatshehopedorfeared，shecouldnothavesaid；amostirrationalandindefensibledesireforsomeassuranceofhisaffectionwas，perhaps，uppermostinhermind。

Peevishness，complaints，exactingcross-examinationshewasusedto，butthisattitudeofcomposedquiet，whichseemedtocomefromtheconsciousnessofpowerwithin，puzzledher。Shedidnotknowwhatwasgoingtohappennext。

AtlastWilliamspoke。

“Ithinkit\'salittleodd，don\'tyou？“hesaid，inavoiceofdetachedreflection。“Mostpeople，Imean，wouldbeseriouslyupsetiftheirmarriagewasputoffforsixmonthsorso。Butwearen\'t；nowhowdoyouaccountforthat？“

Shelookedathimandobservedhisjudicialattitudeasofoneholdingfaralooffromemotion。

“Iattributeit，“hewenton，withoutwaitingforhertoanswer，“tothefactthatneitherofusisintheleastromanticabouttheother。

Thatmaybepartly，nodoubt，becausewe\'veknowneachothersolong；

butI\'minclinedtothinkthere\'smoreinitthanthat。There\'ssomethingtemperamental。Ithinkyou\'reatriflecold，andIsuspectI\'matrifleself-absorbed。Ifthatweresoitgoesalongwaytoexplainingouroddlackofillusionabouteachother。I\'mnotsayingthatthemostsatisfactorymarriagesaren\'tfoundeduponthissortofunderstanding。Butcertainlyitstruckmeasoddthismorning，whenWilsontoldme，howlittleupsetIfelt。Bytheway，you\'resurewehaven\'tcommittedourselvestothathouse？“

“I\'vekepttheletters，andI\'llgothroughthemto-morrow；butI\'mcertainwe\'reonthesafeside。“

“Thanks。Astothepsychologicalproblem，“hecontinued，asifthequestioninterestedhiminadetachedway，“there\'snodoubt，Ithink，thateitherofusiscapableoffeelingwhat，forreasonsofsimplicity，Icallromanceforathirdperson——atleast，I\'velittledoubtinmyowncase。“

Itwas，perhaps，thefirsttimeinallherknowledgeofhimthatKatharinehadknownWilliamenterthusdeliberatelyandwithoutsignofemotionuponastatementofhisownfeelings。Hewaswonttodiscouragesuchintimatediscussionsbyalittlelaughorturnoftheconversation，asmuchastosaythatmen，ormenoftheworld，findsuchtopicsalittlesilly，orindoubtfultaste。Hisobviouswishtoexplainsomethingpuzzledher，interestedher，andneutralizedthewoundtohervanity。Forsomereason，too，shefeltmoreateasewithhimthanusual；orhereasewasmoretheeaseofequality——shecouldnotstoptothinkofthatatthemomentthough。Hisremarksinterestedhertoomuchforthelightthattheythrewuponcertainproblemsofherown。

“Whatisthisromance？“shemused。

“Ah，that\'sthequestion。I\'venevercomeacrossadefinitionthatsatisfiedme，thoughtherearesomeverygoodones“——heglancedinthedirectionofhisbooks。

“It\'snotaltogetherknowingtheotherperson，perhaps——it\'signorance，“shehazarded。

“Someauthoritiessayit\'saquestionofdistance——romanceinliterature，thatis——“

“Possibly，inthecaseofart。Butinthecaseofpeopleitmaybe——“

shehesitated。

“Haveyounopersonalexperienceofit？“heasked，lettinghiseyesrestuponherswiftlyforamoment。

“Ibelieveit\'sinfluencedmeenormously，“shesaid，inthetoneofoneabsorbedbythepossibilitiesofsomeviewjustpresentedtothem；

“butinmylifethere\'ssolittlescopeforit，“sheadded。Shereviewedherdailytask，theperpetualdemandsuponherforgoodsense，self-control，andaccuracyinahousecontainingaromanticmother。Ah，butherromancewasn\'tTHATromance。Itwasadesire，anecho，asound；shecoulddrapeitincolor，seeitinform，hearitinmusic，butnotinwords；no，neverinwords。Shesighed，teasedbydesiressoincoherent，soincommunicable。

“Butisn\'titcurious，“Williamresumed，“thatyoushouldneitherfeelitforme，norIforyou？“

Katharineagreedthatitwascurious——very；butevenmorecurioustoherwasthefactthatshewasdiscussingthequestionwithWilliam。Itrevealedpossibilitieswhichopenedaprospectofanewrelationshipaltogether。Somehowitseemedtoherthathewashelpinghertounderstandwhatshehadneverunderstood；andinhergratitudeshewasconsciousofamostsisterlydesiretohelphim，too——sisterly，saveforonepang，notquitetobesubdued，thatforhimshewaswithoutromance。

“Ithinkyoumightbeveryhappywithsomeoneyoulovedinthatway，“

shesaid。

“Youassumethatromancesurvivesacloserknowledgeofthepersononeloves？“

Heaskedthequestionformally，toprotecthimselffromthesortofpersonalitywhichhedreaded。Thewholesituationneededthemostcarefulmanagementlestitshoulddegenerateintosomedegradinganddisturbingexhibitionsuchasthescene，whichhecouldneverthinkofwithoutshame，upontheheathamongthedeadleaves。Andyeteachsentencebroughthimrelief。Hewascomingtounderstandsomethingorotherabouthisowndesireshithertoundefinedbyhim，thesourceofhisdifficultywithKatharine。Thewishtohurther，whichhadurgedhimtobegin，hadcompletelylefthim，andhefeltthatitwasonlyKatharinenowwhocouldhelphimtobesure。Hemusttakehistime。

Thereweresomanythingsthathecouldnotsaywithoutthegreatestdifficulty——thatname，forexample，Cassandra。Norcouldhemovehiseyesfromacertainspot，afieryglensurroundedbyhighmountains，intheheartofthecoals。HewaitedinsuspenseforKatharinetocontinue。Shehadsaidthathemightbeveryhappywithsomeonehelovedinthatway。

“Idon\'tseewhyitshouldn\'tlastwithyou，“sheresumed。“Icanimagineacertainsortofperson——“shepaused；shewasawarethathewaslisteningwiththegreatestintentness，andthathisformalitywasmerelythecoverforanextremeanxietyofsomesort。Therewassomepersonthen——somewoman——whocoulditbe？Cassandra？Ah，possibly——

“Aperson，“sheadded，speakinginthemostmatter-of-facttoneshecouldcommand，“likeCassandraOtway，forinstance。CassandraisthemostinterestingoftheOtways——withtheexceptionofHenry。Evenso，IlikeCassandrabetter。Shehasmorethanmerecleverness。Sheisacharacter——apersonbyherself。“

“Thosedreadfulinsects！“burstfromWilliam，withanervouslaugh，andalittlespasmwentthroughhimasKatharinenoticed。ItWAS

Cassandrathen。Automaticallyanddullyshereplied，“Youcouldinsistthatsheconfinedherselfto——to——somethingelse……Butshecaresformusic；Ibelieveshewritespoetry；andtherecanbenodoubtthatshehasapeculiarcharm——“

Sheceased，asifdefiningtoherselfthispeculiarcharm。Afteramoment\'ssilenceWilliamjerkedout:

“Ithoughtheraffectionate？“

“Extremelyaffectionate。SheworshipsHenry。Whenyouthinkwhatahousethatis——UncleFrancisalwaysinonemoodoranother——“

“Dear，dear，dear，“Williammuttered。

“Andyouhavesomuchincommon。“

“MydearKatharine！“Williamexclaimed，flinginghimselfbackinhischair，anduprootinghiseyesfromthespotinthefire。“Ireallydon\'tknowwhatwe\'retalkingabout……Iassureyou……“

Hewascoveredwithanextremeconfusion。

HewithdrewthefingerthatwasstillthrustbetweenthepagesofGulliver，openedthebook，andranhiseyedownthelistofchapters，asthoughhewereabouttoselecttheonemostsuitableforreadingaloud。AsKatharinewatchedhim，shewasseizedwithpreliminarysymptomsofhisownpanic。Atthesametimeshewasconvincedthat，shouldhefindtherightpage，takeouthisspectacles，clearhisthroat，andopenhislips，achancethatwouldnevercomeagaininalltheirliveswouldbelosttothemboth。

“We\'retalkingaboutthingsthatinterestusbothverymuch，“shesaid。“Shan\'twegoontalking，andleaveSwiftforanothertime？I

don\'tfeelinthemoodforSwift，andit\'sapitytoreadanyonewhenthat\'sthecase——particularlySwift。“

Thepresenceofwiseliteraryspeculation，asshecalculated，restoredWilliam\'sconfidenceinhissecurity，andhereplacedthebookinthebookcase，keepinghisbackturnedtoherashedidso，andtakingadvantageofthiscircumstancetosummonhisthoughtstogether。

Butasecondofintrospectionhadthealarmingresultofshowinghimthathismind，whenlookedatfromwithin，wasnolongerfamiliarground。Hefelt，thatistosay，whathehadneverconsciouslyfeltbefore；hewasrevealedtohimselfasotherthanhewaswonttothinkhim；hewasafloatuponaseaofunknownandtumultuouspossibilities。

Hepacedonceupanddowntheroom，andthenflunghimselfimpetuouslyintothechairbyKatharine\'sside。Hehadneverfeltanythinglikethisbefore；heputhimselfentirelyintoherhands；hecastoffallresponsibility。Heverynearlyexclaimedaloud:

“You\'vestirredupalltheseodiousandviolentemotions，andnowyoumustdothebestyoucanwiththem。“

Hernearpresence，however，hadacalmingandreassuringeffectuponhisagitation，andhewasconsciousonlyofanimplicittrustthat，somehow，hewassafewithher，thatshewouldseehimthrough，findoutwhatitwasthathewanted，andprocureitforhim。

“Iwishtodowhateveryoutellmetodo，“hesaid。“Iputmyselfentirelyinyourhands，Katharine。“

“Youmusttrytotellmewhatyoufeel，“shesaid。

“Mydear，Ifeelathousandthingseverysecond。Idon\'tknow，I\'msure，whatIfeel。Thatafternoonontheheath——itwasthen——then——“

Hebrokeoff；hedidnottellherwhathadhappenedthen。“Yourghastlygoodsense，asusual，hasconvincedme——forthemoment——butwhatthetruthis，Heavenonlyknows！“heexclaimed。

“Isn\'titthetruththatyouare，ormightbe，inlovewithCassandra？“shesaidgently。

Williambowedhishead。Afteramoment\'ssilencehemurmured:

“Ibelieveyou\'reright，Katharine。“

Shesighed，involuntarily。Shehadbeenhopingallthistime，withanintensitythatincreasedsecondbysecondagainstthecurrentofherwords，thatitwouldnotintheendcometothis。Afteramomentofsurprisinganguish，shesummonedhercouragetotellhimhowshewishedonlythatshemighthelphim，andhadframedthefirstwordsofherspeechwhenaknock，terrificandstartlingtopeopleintheiroverwroughtcondition，soundeduponthedoor。

“Katharine，Iworshipyou，“heurged，halfinawhisper。

“Yes，“shereplied，withdrawingwithalittleshiver，“butyoumustopenthedoor。“

CHAPTERXXIII

WhenRalphDenhamenteredtheroomandsawKatharineseatedwithherbacktohim，hewasconsciousofachangeinthegradeoftheatmospheresuchasatravelermeetswithsometimesupontheroads，particularlyaftersunset，when，withoutwarning，herunsfromclammychilltoahoardofunspentwarmthinwhichthesweetnessofhayandbeanfieldischerished，asifthesunstillshonealthoughthemoonisup。Hehesitated；heshuddered；hewalkedelaboratelytothewindowandlaidasidehiscoat。Hebalancedhisstickmostcarefullyagainstthefoldsofthecurtain。Thusoccupiedwithhisownsensationsandpreparations，hehadlittletimetoobservewhateitheroftheothertwowasfeeling。Suchsymptomsofagitationashemightperceive(andtheyhadlefttheirtokensinbrightnessofeyeandpallorofcheeks)

seemedtohimwellbefittingtheactorsinsogreatadramaasthatofKatharineHilbery\'sdailylife。Beautyandpassionwerethebreathofherbeing，hethought。

Shescarcelynoticedhispresence，oronlyasitforcedhertoadoptamannerofcomposure，whichshewascertainlyfarfromfeeling。

William，however，wasevenmoreagitatedthanshewas，andherfirstinstalmentofpromisedhelptooktheformofsomecommonplaceupontheageofthebuildingorthearchitect\'sname，whichgavehimanexcusetofumbleinadrawerforcertaindesigns，whichhelaiduponthetablebetweenthethreeofthem。

Whichofthethreefollowedthedesignsmostcarefullyitwouldbedifficulttotell，butitiscertainthatnotoneofthethreefoundforthemomentanythingtosay。Yearsoftraininginadrawing-roomcameatlengthtoKatharine\'shelp，andshesaidsomethingsuitable，atthesamemomentwithdrawingherhandfromthetablebecausesheperceivedthatittrembled。Williamagreedeffusively；Denhamcorroboratedhim，speakinginratherhigh-pitchedtones；theythrustasidetheplans，anddrewnearertothefireplace。

“I\'dratherliveherethananywhereinthewholeofLondon，“saidDenham。

(“AndI\'vegotnowheretolive“)Katharinethought，assheagreedaloud。

“Youcouldgetroomshere，nodoubt，ifyouwantedto，“Rodneyreplied。

“ButI\'mjustleavingLondonforgood——I\'vetakenthatcottageIwastellingyouabout。“Theannouncementseemedtoconveyverylittletoeitherofhishearers。

“Indeed？——that\'ssad……Youmustgivemeyouraddress。Butyouwon\'tcutyourselfoffaltogether，surely——“

“You\'llbemoving，too，Isuppose，“Denhamremarked。

WilliamshowedsuchvisiblesignsofflounderingthatKatharinecollectedherselfandasked:

“Whereisthecottageyou\'vetaken？“

Inansweringher，Denhamturnedandlookedather。Astheireyesmet，sherealizedforthefirsttimethatshewastalkingtoRalphDenham，andsheremembered，withoutrecallinganydetails，thatshehadbeenspeakingofhimquitelately，andthatshehadreasontothinkillofhim。WhatMaryhadsaidshecouldnotremember，butshefeltthattherewasamassofknowledgeinhermindwhichshehadnothadtimetoexamine——knowledgenowlyingonthefarsideofagulf。Butheragitationflashedthequeerestlightsuponherpast。Shemustgetthroughthematterinhand，andthenthinkitoutinquiet。ShebenthermindtofollowwhatRalphwassaying。HewastellingherthathehadtakenacottageinNorfolk，andshewassayingthatsheknew，ordidnotknow，thatparticularneighborhood。Butafteramoment\'sattentionhermindflewtoRodney，andshehadanunusual，indeedunprecedented，sensethattheywereintouchandsharedeachother\'sthoughts。IfonlyRalphwerenotthere，shewouldatoncegivewaytoherdesiretotakeWilliam\'shand，thentobendhisheaduponhershoulder，forthiswaswhatshewantedtodomorethananythingatthemoment，unless，indeed，shewishedmorethananythingtobealone——

yes，thatwaswhatshewanted。Shewassicktodeathofthesediscussions；sheshiveredattheefforttorevealherfeelings。Shehadforgottentoanswer。Williamwasspeakingnow。

“Butwhatwillyoufindtodointhecountry？“sheaskedatrandom，strikingintoaconversationwhichshehadonlyhalfheard，insuchawayastomakebothRodneyandDenhamlookatherwithalittlesurprise。Butdirectlyshetookuptheconversation，itwasWilliam\'sturntofallsilent。Heatonceforgottolistentowhattheyweresaying，althoughheinterposednervouslyatintervals，“Yes，yes，yes。“Astheminutespassed，Ralph\'spresencebecamemoreandmoreintolerabletohim，sincetherewassomuchthathemustsaytoKatharine；themomenthecouldnottalktoher，terribledoubts，unanswerablequestionsaccumulated，whichhemustlaybeforeKatharine，forshealonecouldhelphimnow。Unlesshecouldseeheralone，itwouldbeimpossibleforhimevertosleep，ortoknowwhathehadsaidinamomentofmadness，whichwasnotaltogethermad，orwasitmad？Henoddedhishead，andsaid，nervously，“Yes，yes，“andlookedatKatharine，andthoughthowbeautifulshelooked；therewasnooneintheworldthatheadmiredmore。Therewasanemotioninherfacewhichlentitanexpressionhehadneverseenthere。Then，ashewasturningovermeansbywhichhecouldspeaktoheralone，sherose，andhewastakenbysurprise，forhehadcountedonthefactthatshewouldoutstayDenham。Hisonlychance，then，ofsayingsomethingtoherinprivate，wastotakeherdownstairsandwalkwithhertothestreet。Whilehehesitated，however，overcomewiththedifficultyofputtingonesimplethoughtintowordswhenallhisthoughtswerescatteredabout，andallweretoostrongforutterance，hewasstrucksilentbysomethingthatwasstillmoreunexpected。Denhamgotupfromhischair，lookedatKatharine，andsaid:

“I\'mgoing，too。Shallwegotogether？“

AndbeforeWilliamcouldseeanywayofdetaininghim——orwoulditbebettertodetainKatharine？——hehadtakenhishat，stick，andwasholdingthedooropenforKatharinetopassout。ThemostthatWilliamcoulddowastostandattheheadofthestairsandsaygood-night。Hecouldnotoffertogowiththem。Hecouldnotinsistthatsheshouldstay。Hewatchedherdescend，ratherslowly，owingtotheduskofthestaircase，andhehadalastsightofDenham\'sheadandofKatharine\'sheadneartogether，againstthepanels，whensuddenlyapangofacutejealousyovercamehim，andhadhenotremainedconsciousoftheslippersuponhisfeet，hewouldhaverunafterthemorcriedout。Asitwashecouldnotmovefromthespot。AttheturnofthestaircaseKatharineturnedtolookback，trustingtothislastglancetosealtheircompactofgoodfriendship。Insteadofreturninghersilentgreeting，Williamgrinnedbackatheracoldstareofsarcasmorofrage。

Shestoppeddeadforamoment，andthendescendedslowlyintothecourt。Shelookedtotherightandtotheleft，andonceupintothesky。ShewasonlyconsciousofDenhamasablockuponherthoughts。

Shemeasuredthedistancethatmustbetraversedbeforeshewouldbealone。ButwhentheycametotheStrandnocabsweretobeseen，andDenhambrokethesilencebysaying:

“Thereseemtobenocabs。Shallwewalkonalittle？“

“Verywell，“sheagreed，payingnoattentiontohim。

Awareofherpreoccupation，orabsorbedinhisownthoughts，Ralphsaidnothingfurther；andinsilencetheywalkedsomedistancealongtheStrand。Ralphwasdoinghisbesttoputhisthoughtsintosuchorderthatonecamebeforetherest，andthedeterminationthatwhenhespokeheshouldspeakworthily，madehimputoffthemomentofspeakingtillhehadfoundtheexactwordsandeventheplacethatbestsuitedhim。TheStrandwastoobusy。Therewastoomuchrisk，also，offindinganemptycab。Withoutawordofexplanationheturnedtotheleft，downoneofthesidestreetsleadingtotheriver。Onnoaccountmusttheypartuntilsomethingoftheverygreatestimportancehadhappened。Heknewperfectlywellwhathewishedtosay，andhadarrangednotonlythesubstance，buttheorderinwhichhewastosayit。Now，however，thathewasalonewithher，notonlydidhefindthedifficultyofspeakingalmostinsurmountable，buthewasawarethathewasangrywithherforthusdisturbinghim，andcasting，asitwassoeasyforapersonofheradvantagestodo，thesephantomsandpitfallsacrosshispath。Hewasdeterminedthathewouldquestionherasseverelyashewouldquestionhimself；andmakethemboth，onceandforall，eitherjustifyherdominanceorrenounceit。Butthelongertheywalkedthusalone，themorehewasdisturbedbythesenseofheractualpresence。Herskirtblew；thefeathersinherhatwaved；

sometimeshesawherasteportwoaheadofhim，orhadtowaitforhertocatchhimup。

Thesilencewasprolonged，andatlengthdrewherattentiontohim。

Firstshewasannoyedthattherewasnocabtofreeherfromhiscompany；thensherecalledvaguelysomethingthatMaryhadsaidtomakeherthinkillofhim；shecouldnotrememberwhat，buttherecollection，combinedwithhismasterfulways——whydidhewalksofastdownthissidestreet？——madehermoreandmoreconsciousofapersonofmarked，thoughdisagreeable，forcebyherside。Shestoppedand，lookingroundherforacab，sightedoneinthedistance。Hewasthusprecipitatedintospeech。

“Shouldyoumindifwewalkedalittlefarther？“heasked。“There\'ssomethingIwanttosaytoyou。“

“Verywell，“shereplied，guessingthathisrequesthadsomethingtodowithMaryDatchet。

“It\'squieterbytheriver，“hesaid，andinstantlyhecrossedover。

“Iwanttoaskyoumerelythis，“hebegan。Buthepausedsolongthatshecouldseehisheadagainstthesky；theslopeofhisthincheekandhislarge，strongnosewereclearlymarkedagainstit。Whilehepaused，wordsthatwerequitedifferentfromthoseheintendedtousepresentedthemselves。

“I\'vemadeyoumystandardeversinceIsawyou。I\'vedreamtaboutyou；I\'vethoughtofnothingbutyou；yourepresenttometheonlyrealityintheworld。“

Hiswords，andthequeerstrainedvoiceinwhichhespokethem，madeitappearasifheaddressedsomepersonwhowasnotthewomanbesidehim，butsomeonefaraway。

“Andnowthingshavecometosuchapassthat，unlessIcanspeaktoyouopenly，IbelieveIshallgomad。Ithinkofyouasthemostbeautiful，thetruestthingintheworld，“hecontinued，filledwithasenseofexaltation，andfeelingthathehadnoneednowtochoosehiswordswithpedanticaccuracy，forwhathewantedtosaywassuddenlybecomeplaintohim。

“Iseeyoueverywhere，inthestars，intheriver；tomeyou\'reeverythingthatexists；therealityofeverything。Life，Itellyou，wouldbeimpossiblewithoutyou。AndnowIwant——“

Shehadheardhimsofarwithafeelingthatshehaddroppedsomematerialwordwhichmadesenseoftherest。Shecouldhearnomoreofthisunintelligibleramblingwithoutcheckinghim。Shefeltthatshewasoverhearingwhatwasmeantforanother。

“Idon\'tunderstand，“shesaid。“You\'resayingthingsthatyoudon\'tmean。“

“ImeaneverywordIsay，“hereplied，emphatically。Heturnedhisheadtowardsher。Sherecoveredthewordsshewassearchingforwhilehespoke。“RalphDenhamisinlovewithyou。“TheycamebacktoherinMaryDatchet\'svoice。Herangerblazedupinher。

“IsawMaryDatchetthisafternoon，“sheexclaimed。

Hemadeamovementasifheweresurprisedortakenaback，butansweredinamoment:

“ShetoldyouthatIhadaskedhertomarryme，Isuppose？“

“No！“Katharineexclaimed，insurprise。

“Ididthough。ItwasthedayIsawyouatLincoln，“hecontinued。“I

hadmeanttoaskhertomarryme，andthenIlookedoutofthewindowandsawyou。AfterthatIdidn\'twanttoaskanyonetomarryme。ButIdidit；andsheknewIwaslying，andrefusedme。Ithoughtthen，andstillthink，thatshecaresforme。Ibehavedverybadly。Idon\'tdefendmyself。“

“No，“saidKatharine，“Ishouldhopenot。There\'snodefencethatI

canthinkof。Ifanyconductiswrong，thatis。“Shespokewithanenergythatwasdirectedevenmoreagainstherselfthanagainsthim。

“Itseemstome，“shecontinued，withthesameenergy，“thatpeopleareboundtobehonest。There\'snoexcuseforsuchbehavior。“ShecouldnowseeplainlybeforehereyestheexpressiononMaryDatchet\'sface。

Afterashortpause，hesaid:

“IamnottellingyouthatIaminlovewithyou。Iamnotinlovewithyou。“

“Ididn\'tthinkthat，“shereplied，consciousofsomebewilderment。

“IhavenotspokenawordtoyouthatIdonotmean，“headded。

“Tellmethenwhatitisthatyoumean，“shesaidatlength。

Asifobeyingacommoninstinct，theybothstoppedand，bendingslightlyoverthebalustradeoftheriver，lookedintotheflowingwater。

“Yousaythatwe\'vegottobehonest，“Ralphbegan。“Verywell。Iwilltrytotellyouthefacts；butIwarnyou，you\'llthinkmemad。It\'safact，though，thatsinceIfirstsawyoufourorfivemonthsagoI

havemadeyou，inanutterlyabsurdway，Iexpect，myideal。I\'malmostashamedtotellyouwhatlengthsI\'vegoneto。It\'sbecomethethingthatmattersmostinmylife。“Hecheckedhimself。“Withoutknowingyou，exceptthatyou\'rebeautiful，andallthat，I\'vecometobelievethatwe\'reinsomesortofagreement；thatwe\'reaftersomethingtogether；thatweseesomething……I\'vegotintothehabitofimaginingyou；I\'malwaysthinkingwhatyou\'dsayordo；I

walkalongthestreettalkingtoyou；Idreamofyou。It\'smerelyabadhabit，aschoolboyhabit，day-dreaming；it\'sacommonexperience；

halfone\'sfriendsdothesame；well，thosearethefacts。“

Simultaneously，theybothwalkedonveryslowly。

“Ifyouweretoknowmeyouwouldfeelnoneofthis，“shesaid。“Wedon\'tknoweachother——we\'vealwaysbeen——interrupted……Wereyougoingtotellmethisthatdaymyauntscame？“sheasked，recollectingthewholescene。

Hebowedhishead。

“Thedayyoutoldmeofyourengagement，“hesaid。

Shethought，withastart，thatshewasnolongerengaged。

“IdenythatIshouldceasetofeelthisifIknewyou，“hewenton。

“Ishouldfeelitmorereasonably——that\'sall。Ishouldn\'ttalkthekindofnonsenseI\'vetalkedto-night……Butitwasn\'tnonsense。

Itwasthetruth，“hesaiddoggedly。“It\'stheimportantthing。Youcanforcemetotalkasifthisfeelingforyouwereanhallucination，butallourfeelingsarethat。Thebestofthemarehalfillusions。

Still，“headded，asifarguingtohimself，“ifitweren\'tasrealafeelingasI\'mcapableof，Ishouldn\'tbechangingmylifeonyouraccount。“

“Whatdoyoumean？“sheinquired。

“Itoldyou。I\'mtakingacottage。I\'mgivingupmyprofession。“

“Onmyaccount？“sheasked，inamazement。

“Yes，onyouraccount，“hereplied。Heexplainedhismeaningnofurther。

“ButIdon\'tknowyouoryourcircumstances，“shesaidatlast，asheremainedsilent。

“Youhavenoopinionaboutmeonewayortheother？“

“Yes，IsupposeIhaveanopinion——“shehesitated。

Hecontrolledhiswishtoaskhertoexplainherself，andmuchtohispleasureshewenton，appearingtosearchhermind。

“Ithoughtthatyoucriticizedme——perhapsdislikedme。Ithoughtofyouasapersonwhojudges——“

“No；I\'mapersonwhofeels，“hesaid，inalowvoice。

“Tellme，then，whathasmadeyoudothis？“sheasked，afterabreak。

Hetoldherinanorderlyway，betokeningcarefulpreparation，allthathehadmeanttosayatfirst；howhestoodwithregardtohisbrothersandsisters；whathismotherhadsaid，andhissisterJoanhadrefrainedfromsaying；exactlyhowmanypoundsstoodinhisnameatthebank；whatprospecthisbrotherhadofearningalivelihoodinAmerica；howmuchoftheirincomewentonrent，andotherdetailsknowntohimbyheart。Shelistenedtoallthis，sothatshecouldhavepassedanexaminationinitbythetimeWaterlooBridgewasinsight；andyetshewasnomorelisteningtoitthanshewascountingthepaving-stonesatherfeet。Shewasfeelinghappierthanshehadfeltinherlife。IfDenhamcouldhaveseenhowvisiblybooksofalgebraicsymbols，pagesallspeckledwithdotsanddashesandtwistedbars，camebeforehereyesastheytrodtheEmbankment，hissecretjoyinherattentionmighthavebeendispersed。Shewenton，saying，“Yes，Isee……Buthowwouldthathelpyou？……Yourbrotherhaspassedhisexamination？“sosensibly，thathehadconstantlytokeephisbrainincheck；andallthetimeshewasinfancylookingupthroughatelescopeatwhiteshadow-cleftdiskswhichwereotherworlds，untilshefeltherselfpossessedoftwobodies，onewalkingbytheriverwithDenham，theotherconcentratedtoasilverglobealoftinthefinebluespaceabovethescumofvaporsthatwascoveringthevisibleworld。Shelookedattheskyonce，andsawthatnostarwaskeenenoughtopiercetheflightofwaterycloudsnowcoursingrapidlybeforethewestwind。Shelookeddownhurriedlyagain。Therewasnoreason，sheassuredherself，forthisfeelingofhappiness；shewasnotfree；shewasnotalone；shewasstillboundtoearthbyamillionfibres；everysteptookhernearerhome。Nevertheless，sheexultedasshehadneverexultedbefore。Theairwasfresher，thelightsmoredistinct，thecoldstoneofthebalustradecolderandharder，whenbychanceorpurposeshestruckherhandagainstit。NofeelingofannoyancewithDenhamremained；hecertainlydidnothinderanyflightshemightchoosetomake，whetherinthedirectionoftheskyorofherhome；butthatherconditionwasduetohim，ortoanythingthathehadsaid，shehadnoconsciousnessatall。

TheywerenowwithinsightofthestreamofcabsandomnibusescrossingtoandfromtheSurreysideoftheriver；thesoundofthetraffic，thehootingofmotor-horns，andthelightchimeoftram-bellssoundedmoreandmoredistinctly，and，withtheincreaseofnoise，theybothbecamesilent。Withacommoninstincttheyslackenedtheirpace，asiftolengthenthetimeofsemi-privacyallowedthem。ToRalph，thepleasureoftheselastyardsofthewalkwithKatharinewassogreatthathecouldnotlookbeyondthepresentmomenttothetimewhensheshouldhavelefthim。Hehadnowishtousethelastmomentsoftheircompanionshipinaddingfreshwordstowhathehadalreadysaid。Sincetheyhadstoppedtalking，shehadbecometohimnotsomucharealperson，astheverywomanhedreamtof；buthissolitarydreamshadneverproducedanysuchkeennessofsensationasthatwhichhefeltinherpresence。Hehimselfwasalsostrangelytransfigured。

Hehadcompletemasteryofallhisfaculties。Forthefirsttimehewasinpossessionofhisfullpowers。Thevistaswhichopenedbeforehimseemedtohavenoperceptibleend。Butthemoodhadnoneoftherestlessnessorfeverishdesiretoaddonedelighttoanotherwhichhadhithertomarked，andsomewhatspoilt，themostrapturousofhisimaginings。Itwasamoodthattooksuchclear-eyedaccountoftheconditionsofhumanlifethathewasnotdisturbedintheleastbytheglidingpresenceofataxicab，andwithoutagitationheperceivedthatKatharinewasconsciousofitalso，andturnedherheadinthatdirection。Theirhaltingstepsacknowledgedthedesirabilityofengagingthecab；andtheystoppedsimultaneously，andsignedtoit。

“Thenyouwillletmeknowyourdecisionassoonasyoucan？“heasked，withhishandonthedoor。

Shehesitatedforamoment。Shecouldnotimmediatelyrecallwhatthequestionwasthatshehadtodecide。

“Iwillwrite，“shesaidvaguely。“No，“sheadded，inasecond，bethinkingherofthedifficultiesofwritinganythingdecideduponaquestiontowhichshehadpaidnoattention，“Idon\'tseehowtomanageit。“

ShestoodlookingatDenham，consideringandhesitating，withherfootuponthestep。Heguessedherdifficulties；heknewinasecondthatshehadheardnothing；hekneweverythingthatshefelt。

“There\'sonlyoneplacetodiscussthingssatisfactorilythatIknowof，“hesaidquickly；“that\'sKew。“

“Kew？“

“Kew，“herepeated，withimmensedecision。Heshutthedoorandgaveheraddresstothedriver。Sheinstantlywasconveyedawayfromhim，andhercabjoinedtheknottedstreamofvehicles，eachmarkedbyalight，andindistinguishableonefromtheother。Hestoodwatchingforamoment，andthen，asifsweptbysomefierceimpulse，fromthespotwheretheyhadstood，heturned，crossedtheroadatarapidpace，anddisappeared。

Hewalkedonupontheimpetusofthislastmoodofalmostsupernaturalexaltationuntilhereachedanarrowstreet，atthishouremptyoftrafficandpassengers。Here，whetheritwastheshopswiththeirshutteredwindows，thesmoothandsilveredcurveofthewoodpavement，oranaturalebboffeeling，hisexaltationslowlyoozedanddesertedhim。Hewasnowconsciousofthelossthatfollowsanyrevelation；hehadlostsomethinginspeakingtoKatharine，for，afterall，wastheKatharinewhomhelovedthesameastherealKatharine？Shehadtranscendedherentirelyatmoments；herskirthadblown，herfeatherwaved，hervoicespoken；yes，buthowterriblesometimesthepausebetweenthevoiceofone\'sdreamsandthevoicethatcomesfromtheobjectofone\'sdreams！Hefeltamixtureofdisgustandpityatthefigurecutbyhumanbeingswhentheytrytocarryout，inpractice，whattheyhavethepowertoconceive。HowsmallbothheandKatharinehadappearedwhentheyissuedfromthecloudofthoughtthatenvelopedthem！Herecalledthesmall，inexpressive，commonplacewordsinwhichtheyhadtriedtocommunicatewitheachother；herepeatedthemovertohimself。ByrepeatingKatharine\'swords，hecameinafewmomentstosuchasenseofherpresencethatheworshippedhermorethanever。

Butshewasengagedtobemarried，herememberedwithastart。Thestrengthofhisfeelingwasrevealedtohiminstantly，andhegavehimselfuptoanirresistiblerageandsenseoffrustration。TheimageofRodneycamebeforehimwitheverycircumstanceoffollyandindignity。Thatlittlepink-cheekeddancing-mastertomarryKatharine？

thatgibberingasswiththefaceofamonkeyonanorgan？thatposing，vain，fantasticalfop？withhistragediesandhiscomedies，hisinnumerablespitesandpridesandpettinesses？Lord！marryRodney！Shemustbeasgreatafoolashewas。Hisbitternesstookpossessionofhim，andashesatinthecorneroftheundergroundcarriage，helookedasstarkanimageofunapproachableseverityascouldbeimagined。Directlyhereachedhomehesatdownathistable，andbegantowriteKatharinealong，wild，madletter，beggingherforboththeirsakestobreakwithRodney，imploringhernottodowhatwoulddestroyforevertheonebeauty，theonetruth，theonehope；nottobeatraitor，nottobeadeserter，forifshewere——andhewoundupwithaquietandbriefassertionthat，whatevershedidorleftundone，hewouldbelievetobethebest，andacceptfromherwithgratitude。Hecoveredsheetaftersheet，andheardtheearlycartsstartingforLondonbeforehewenttobed。

CHAPTERXXIV

Thefirstsignsofspring，evensuchasmakethemselvesfelttowardsthemiddleofFebruary，notonlyproducelittlewhiteandvioletflowersinthemoreshelteredcornersofwoodsandgardens，butbringtobirththoughtsanddesirescomparabletothosefaintlycoloredandsweetlyscentedpetalsinthemindsofmenandwomen。Livesfrozenbyage，sofarasthepresentisconcerned，toahardsurface，whichneitherreflectsnoryields，atthisseasonbecomesoftandfluid，reflectingtheshapesandcolorsofthepresent，aswellastheshapesandcolorsofthepast。InthecaseofMrs。Hilbery，theseearlyspringdayswerechieflyupsettinginasmuchastheycausedageneralquickeningofheremotionalpowers，which，asfarasthepastwasconcerned，hadneversufferedmuchdiminution。Butinthespringherdesireforexpressioninvariablyincreased。Shewashauntedbytheghostsofphrases。Shegaveherselfuptoasensualdelightinthecombinationsofwords。Shesoughttheminthepagesofherfavoriteauthors。Shemadethemforherselfonscrapsofpaper，androlledthemonhertonguewhenthereseemednooccasionforsucheloquence。Shewasupheldintheseexcursionsbythecertaintythatnolanguagecouldoutdothesplendorofherfather\'smemory，andalthoughhereffortsdidnotnotablyfurthertheendofhisbiography，shewasundertheimpressionoflivingmoreinhisshadeatsuchtimesthanatothers。

Noonecanescapethepoweroflanguage，letalonethoseofEnglishbirthbroughtupfromchildhood，asMrs。Hilberyhadbeen，todisportthemselvesnowintheSaxonplainness，nowintheLatinsplendorofthetongue，andstoredwithmemories，asshewas，ofoldpoetsexuberatinginaninfinityofvocables。EvenKatharinewasslightlyaffectedagainstherbetterjudgmentbyhermother\'senthusiasm。NotthatherjudgmentcouldaltogetheracquiesceinthenecessityforastudyofShakespeare\'ssonnetsasapreliminarytothefifthchapterofhergrandfather\'sbiography。Beginningwithaperfectlyfrivolousjest，Mrs。HilberyhadevolvedatheorythatAnneHathawayhadaway，amongotherthings，ofwritingShakespeare\'ssonnets；theidea，struckouttoenlivenapartyofprofessors，whoforwardedanumberofprivatelyprintedmanualswithinthenextfewdaysforherinstruction，hadsubmergedherinafloodofElizabethanliterature；

shehadcomehalftobelieveinherjoke，whichwas，shesaid，atleastasgoodasotherpeople\'sfacts，andallherfancyforthetimebeingcentereduponStratford-on-Avon。Shehadaplan，shetoldKatharine，when，ratherlaterthanusual，Katharinecameintotheroomthemorningafterherwalkbytheriver，forvisitingShakespeare\'stomb。Anyfactaboutthepoethadbecome，forthemoment，offargreaterinteresttoherthantheimmediatepresent，andthecertaintythattherewasexistinginEnglandaspotofgroundwhereShakespearehadundoubtedlystood，wherehisveryboneslaydirectlybeneathone\'sfeet，wassoabsorbingtoheronthisparticularoccasionthatshegreetedherdaughterwiththeexclamation:

“D\'youthinkheeverpassedthishouse？“