第6章

"Wecan\'tallbegeniuses，butwecanalllookjolly。"

Sheltonhastenedtolookjolly。

"Itellthegovernor，whenhe\'sglum，thatIshallputuptheshuttersandleavehim。What\'sthegoodofmopin\'andlookin\'

miserable？AreyougoingtotheFour-in-HandMeet？We\'remakingaparty。Suchfun；allthesmartpeople!"

Thesplendourofhershoulders，herfrizzyhair(clearlynottwohoursoutofthebarber\'shands)，mighthavemadehimdoubtful；butthefrankshrewdnessinhereyes，andhercarefullyclippedtoneofvoice，wereguaranteesthatshewaspartoftheelementatthetablewhichwasreallyquiterespectable。Hehadneverrealisedbeforehow"smart"shewas，andwithaneffortabandonedhimselftoasortofgaietythatwouldhavekilledaFrenchman。

Andwhenshelefthim，hereflectedupontheexpressionofhereyeswhentheyrestedonaladyopposite，whowasatruebird-of-prey。

"Whatisit，"theirenvious，inquisitiveglancehadseemedtosay，"thatmakesyousoreally\'smart\'？"Andwhilestillseekingforthereason，henoticedhishostpointingoutthemeritsofhisporttothehawk-likeman，withadeferentialairquitepitifultosee，forthehawk-likemanwasclearlya"badhat。"Whatinthenameofgoodnessdidthesestaidbourgeoismeanbymakinguptovice？Wasitacravingtobethoughtdistinguished，adreadofbeingdull，ormerelyaneffectofoverfeeding？Againhelookedathishost，whohadnotyetenumeratedallthevirtuesofhisport，andagainfeltsorryforhim。

"Soyou\'regoingtomarryAntoniaDennant？saidavoiceonhisright，withthateasycoarsenesswhichisamarkofcaste。"Prettygirl!They\'veaniceplace，the，Dennants。D\'yeknow，you\'realuckyfeller!"

Thespeakerwasanoldbaronet，withsmalleyes，adusky，ruddyface，andpeculiarhail-fellow-well-metexpression，atoncemoroseandsly。

Hewasalwayshardup，butbeingamanofenterpriseknewallthebestpeople，aswellasalltheworst，sothathedinedouteverynight。

"You\'realuckyfeller，"herepeated；"he\'sgotsomedeucedgoodshootin\'，Dennant!Theycometoohighforme，though；nevertouchedafeatherlasttimeIshotthere。She\'saprettygirl。You\'realuckyfeller!"

"Iknowthat，"saidSheltonhumbly。

"WishIwereinyourshoes。Whowasthatsittin\'ontheothersideofyou？I\'msodashedshort-sighted。Mrs。Carruther？Oh，ay!"Anexpressionwhich，ifhehadnotbeenabaronet，wouldhavebeenaleer，cameonhislips。

Sheltonfeltthathewasreferringtotheleafinhismentalpocket-

bookcoveredwiththeanecdotes，figures，andfactsaboutthatlady。

"Theoldogremeans，"thoughthe，"thatI\'mluckybecausehisleafisblankaboutAntonia。"Buttheoldbaronethadturned，withhissmile，andhissardonic，well-bredair，tolistentoabitofscandalontheotherside。

ThetwomentoShelton\'sleftweretalking。

"What!Youdon\'tcollectanything？How\'sthat？Everybodycollectssomething。Ishouldbelostwithoutmypictures。"

"No，Idon\'tcollectanything。Givenitup；IwastooawfullyhadovermyWalkers。"

Sheltonhadexpectedamoreloftyreason；heappliedhimselftotheMadeirainhisglass。That，hadbeen"collected"byhishost，anditspricewasgoingup!Youcouldn\'tgetiteveryday；worthtwoguineasabottle!Howprecioustheideathatotherpeoplecouldn\'tgetit，madeitseem!Liquiddelight；thepricewasgoingup!Soontherewouldbenoneleft；immense!Absolutelynoone，then，coulddrinkit!

"WishIhadsomeofthis，"saidtheoldbaronet，"butIhavedrunkallmine。"

"Pooroldchap!"thoughtShelton；"afterall，he\'snotabadoldboy。IwishIhadhispluck。Hislivermustbesplendid。"

Thedrawing-roomwasfullofpeopleplayingagameconcernedwithhorsesriddenbyjockeyswiththelatestseat。AndSheltonwascompelledtohelpincarryingonthissporttillearlyinthemorning。Atlastheleft，exhaustedbyhisanimation。

Hethoughtofthewedding；hethoughtoverhisdinnerandthewinethathehaddrunk。Hismoodofsatisfactionfizzledout。Thesepeoplewereincapableofbeingreal，eventhesmartest，eventhemostrespectable；theyseemedtoweightheirpleasuresinthescalesandtogetthemostthatcouldbegottenfortheirmoney。

Betweenthedark，safehousesstretchingformilesandmiles，histhoughtswereofAntonia；andashereachedhisroomshewasovertakenbythemomentwhenthetownisbornagain。Thefirstnewairhadstolendown；theskywasliving，butnotyetalight；thetreeswerequiveringfaintly；nolivingcreaturestirred，andnothingspokeexcepthisheart。Suddenlythecityseemedtobreathe，andSheltonsawthathewasnotalone；anunconsideredtriflewithinferiorbootswasasleepuponhisdoorstep。

CHAPTERX

ANALIEN

Theindividualonthedoorstephadfallenintoslumberoverhisownknees。Nogreaterairofprosperityclungabouthimthanisconveyedbyarustyovercoatandwispsofclothinplaceofsocks。Sheltonendeavouredtopassunseen，butthesleeperwoke。

"Ah，it\'syou，monsieur!"hesaid"Ireceivedyourletterthisevening，andhavelostnotime。"Helookeddownathimselfandtittered，asthoughtosay，"ButwhatastateI\'min!"

Theyoungforeigner\'sconditionwasindeedmoredesperatethanontheoccasionoftheirfirstmeeting，andSheltoninvitedhimupstairs。

"Youcanwellunderstand，"stammeredFerrand，followinghishost，"thatIdidn\'twanttomissyouthistime。Whenoneislikethis——"

andaspasmgrippedhisface。

"I\'mverygladyoucame，"saidSheltondoubtfully。

Hisvisitor\'sfacehadaweek\'sgrowthofreddishbeard；thedeeptanofhischeeksgavehimarobustappearanceatvariancewiththefitof，tremblingwhichhadseizedonhimassoonashehadentered。

"Sitdown-sitdown，"saidShelton；"you\'refeelingill!"

Ferrandsmiled。"It\'snothing，"saidhe；"badnourishment。"

Sheltonlefthimseatedontheedgeofanarmchair，andbroughthiminsomewhisky。

"Clothes，"saidFerrand，whenhehaddrunk，"arewhatIwant。Thesearereallynotgoodenough。"

Thestatementwascorrect，andShelton，placingsomegarmentsinthebath-room，invitedhisvisitortomakehimselfathome。Whilethelatter，then，wasdoingthis，Sheltonenjoyedtheluxuriesofself-

denial，huntingupthingshedidnotwant，andlayingthemintwoportmanteaus。Thisdone，hewaitedforhisvisitor\'sreturn。

Theyoungforeigneratlengthemerged，unshavedindeed，andinnocentofboots，buthavinginotherrespectsanairofgratifyingaffluence。

"Thisisalittledifferent，"hesaid。"Theboots，Ifear"——and，pullingdownhis，orratherShelton\'s，socksheexhibitedsoresthesizeofhalfacrown。"Onedoesn\'tsowwithoutreapingsomeharvestoranother。Mystomachhasshrunk，"headdedsimply。"Toseethingsonemustsuffer。\'Voyager，c\'estplusfortquemoi\'!"

Sheltonfailedtoperceivethatthiswasonewayofdisguisingthehumananimal\'snaturaldislikeofwork——therewasatouchofpathos，asuggestionofGod-knows-what-might-have-been，aboutthisfellow。

"Ihaveeatenmyillusions，"saidtheyoungforeigner，smokingacigarette。"Whenyou\'vestarvedafewtimes，youreyesareopened。

\'Savoir，c\'estmonmetier；maisremarquezceci，monsieur\':It\'snotalwaystheintellectualswhosucceed。"

"Whenyougetajob，"saidShelton，"youthrowitaway，Isuppose。"

"Youaccusemeofrestlessness？ShallIexplainwhatIthinkaboutthat？I\'mrestlessbecauseofambition；Iwanttoreconqueranindependentposition。Iputallmysoulintomytrials，butassoonasIseethere\'snofutureformeinthatline，Igiveitupandgoelsewhere。\'Jeneveuxpasetreronddecuir，\'breakingmybacktoeconomisesixpenceaday，andsaveenoughafterfortyyearstodragouttheremainsofanexhaustedexistence。That\'snotinmycharacter。"Thisingeniousparaphraseofthewords"Isoongettiredofthings"hepronouncedwithanairoflettingSheltonintoaprecioussecret。

"Yes；itmustbehard，"agreedthelatter。

Ferrandshruggedhisshoulders。

"It\'snotallbutter，"hereplied；"oneisobligedtodothingsthatarenottoodelicate。There\'snothingIpridemyselfonbutfrankness。"

Likeagoodchemist，however，headministeredwhatSheltoncouldstandinajudiciousway。"Yes，yes，"heseemedtosay，"you\'dlikemetothinkthatyouhaveaperfectknowledgeoflife:nomorality，noprejudices，noillusions；you\'dlikemetothinkthatyoufeelyourselfonanequalitywithme，onehumananimaltalkingtoanother，withoutanybarriersofposition，money，clothes，ortherest——\'cac\'estunpeutropfort\'!You\'reasgoodanimitationasI\'vecomeacrossinyourclass，notwithstandingyourunfortunateeducation，andI\'mgratefultoyou，buttotellyoueverything，asitpassesthroughmymindwoulddamagemyprospects。Youcanhardlyexpectthat。"

InoneofShelton\'soldfrock-coatshewasimpressive，withhisairofnatural，almostsensitiverefinement。Theroomlookedasifitwereaccustomedtohim，andmoreamazingstillwasthesenseoffamiliaritythatheinspired，as，thoughhewereapartofShelton\'ssoul。Itcameasashocktorealisethatthisyoungforeignvagabondhadtakensuchaplacewithinhisthoughts。Theposeofhislimbsandhead，irregularbutnotungraceful；hisdisillusionedlips；theringsofsmokethatissuedfromthem——allsignifiedrebellion，andtheoverthrowoflawandorder。Histhin，lopsidednose，therapidglancesofhisgoggling，prominenteyes，weresubtletyitself；hestoodfordiscontentwiththeaccepted。

"HowdoIlivewhenIamonthetramp？"hesaid。"well，therearetheconsuls。Thesystemisnotdelicate，butwhenit\'saquestionofstarving，muchispermissible；besides，thesegentlemenwerecreatedforthepurpose。There\'sacoterieofGermanJewsinParislivingentirelyuponconsuls。"Hehesitatedforthefractionofasecond，andresumed:"Yes，monsieur；ifyouhavepapersthatfityou，youcantrysixorsevenconsulsinasingletown。Youmustknowalanguageortwo；butmostofthesegentlemenarenottoowellupinthetonguesofthecountrytheyrepresent。Obtainingmoneyunderfalsepretences？Well，itis。Butwhat\'sthedifferenceatbottombetweenallthishonourablecrowdofdirectors，fashionablephysicians，employersoflabour，ferry-builders，militarymen，countrypriests，andconsulsthemselvesperhaps，whotakemoneyandgivenovalueforit，andpoordevilswhodothesameatfargreaterrisk？Necessitymakesthelaw。Ifthosegentlemenwereinmyposition，doyouthinkthattheywouldhesitate？"

Shelton\'sfaceremainingdoubtful，Ferrandwentoninstantly:"You\'reright；theywould，fromfear，notprinciple。Onemustbehardpressedbeforecommittingtheseindelicacies。Lookdeepenough，andyouwillseewhatindelicatethingsaredailydonebytherespectablefornothalfsogoodareasonasthewantofmeals。"

Sheltonalsotookacigarette——hisownincomewasderivedfrompropertyforwhichhegavenovalueinlabour。

"Icangiveyouaninstance，"saidFerrand，"ofwhatcanbedonebyresolution。OnedayinaGermantown，\'etantdanslamisere\'，I

decidedtotrytheFrenchconsul。Well，asyouknow，IamaFleming，butsomethinghadtobescrewedoutsomewhere。Herefusedtoseeme；

Isatdowntowait。Afterabouttwohoursavoicebellowed:\'Hasn\'tthebrutegone？\'andmyconsulappears。\'I\'venothingforfellowslikeyou，\'sayshe；\'clearout!\'

"\'Monsieur，\'Ianswered，\'Iamskinandbone；Ireallymusthaveassistance。\'

"\'Clearout，\'hesays，\'orthepoliceshallthrowyouout!\'

"Idon\'tbudge。Anotherhourpasses，andbackhecomesagain。

"\'Stillhere？\'sayshe。\'Fetchasergeant。\'

"Thesergeantcomes。

"\'Sergeant，\'saystheconsul，\'turnthiscreatureout。\'

"\'Sergeant，\'Isay，\'thishouseisFrance!\'Naturally，Ihadcalculateduponthat。InGermanythey\'renottoofondofthosewhoundertakethebusinessoftheFrench。

"\'Heisright，\'saysthesergeant；\'Icandonothing。\'

"\'Yourefuse？\'

"\'Absolutely。\'Andhewentaway。

"\'Whatdoyouthinkyou\'llgetbystaying？\'saysmyconsul。

"\'Ihavenothingtoeatordrink，andnowheretosleep，\'saysI。

"\'Whatwillyougofor？\'

"\'Tenmarks。\'

"\'Here，then，getout!\'Icantellyou，monsieur，onemustn\'thaveathinskinifonewantstoexploitconsuls。"

Hisyellowfingersslowlyrolledthestumpofhiscigarette，hisironicallipsflickered。Sheltonthoughtofhisownignoranceoflife。Hecouldnotrecollecteverhavinggonewithoutameal。

"Isuppose，"hesaidfeebly，"you\'veoftenstarved。"For，havingalwaysbeensowellfed，theideaofstarvationwasattractive。

Ferrandsmiled。

"Fourdaysisthelongest，"saidhe。"Youwon\'tbelievethatstory……ItwasinParis，andIhadlostmymoneyontherace-course。

Therewassomeduefromhomewhichdidn\'tcome。FourdaysandnightsIlivedonwater。Myclotheswereexcellent，andIhadjewellery；

butInevereventhoughtofpawningthem。Isufferedmostfromthenotionthatpeoplemightguessmystate。Youdon\'trecognisemenow？"

"Howoldwereyouthen？"saidShelton。

"Seventeen；it\'scuriouswhatone\'slikeatthatage。

ByaflashofinsightSheltonsawthewell-dressedboy，withsensitive，smoothface，alwaysonthemoveaboutthestreetsofParis，forfearthatpeopleshouldobservetheconditionofhisstomach。Thestorywasavaluablecommentary。Histhoughtswerebrusquelyinterrupted；lookinginFerrand\'sface，hesawtohisdismaytearsrollingdownhischeeks。

"I\'vesufferedtoomuch，"hestammered；"whatdoIcarenowwhatbecomesofme？"

Sheltonwasdisconcerted；hewished\'tosaysomethingsympathetic，but，beinganEnglishman，couldonlyturnawayhiseyes。

"Yourturn\'scoming，"hesaidatlast。

"Ah!whenyou\'velivedmylife，"brokeouthisvisitor，"nothing\'sanygood。Myheart\'sinrags。Findmeanythingworthkeeping，inthismenagerie。"

Movedthoughhewas，Sheltonwriggledinhischair，apreytoracialinstinct，toaningrainedover-tenderness，perhaps，ofsoulthatforbadehimfromexposinghisemotions，andrecoiledfromtherevelationofotherpeople\'s。Hecouldstanditonthestage，hecouldstanditinabook，butinreallifehecouldnotstandit。

WhenFerrandhadgoneoffwithaportmanteauineachhand，hesatdownandtoldAntonia:……Thepoorchapbrokedownandsatcryinglikeachild；andinsteadofmakingmefeelsorry，itturnedmeintostone。ThemoresympatheticIwantedtobe，thegrufferIgrew。Isitfearofridicule，independence，orconsideration，forothersthatpreventsonefromshowingone\'sfeelings？

HewentontotellherofFerrand\'sstarvingfourdayssoonerthanfaceapawnbroker；and，readingtheletteroverbeforeaddressingit，thefacesofthethreeladiesroundtheirsnowyclotharosebeforehim——Antonia\'sface，sofairandcalmandwind-fresh；hermother\'sface，alittlecreasedbytimeandweather；themaidenaunt\'ssomewhattoothin-andtheyseemedtoleanathim，alertanddecorous，andthewords"That\'srathernice!"ranginhisears。Hewentouttoposttheletter，andbuyingafive-shillingorderenclosedittothelittlebarber，Carolan，asarewardfordeliveringhisnotetoFerrand。Heomittedtosendhisaddresswiththisdonation，butwhetherfromdelicacyorfromcautionhecouldnothavesaid。Beyonddoubt，however，onreceivingthroughFerrandthefollowingreply，hefeltashamedandpleased3，BLANKRow，WESTMINSTER。

>Fromeverywell-bornsoulhumanityisowing。Athousandthanks。I

receivedthismorningyourpostalorder；yourhearthenceforthformewillbeplacedbeyondallpraise。

J。CAROLAN。

CHAPTERXI

THEVISION

AfewdayslaterhereceivedaletterfromAntoniawhichfilledhimwithexcitement:……AuntCharlotteiseversomuchbetter，somotherthinkswecangohome-hurrah!ButshesaysthatyouandImustkeeptoourarrangementnottoseeeachothertillJuly。Therewillbesomethingfineinbeingsonearandhavingthestrengthtokeepapart……

AlltheEnglisharegone。Ifeelitsoemptyouthere；thesepeoplearesofunny-allforeignandshallow。Oh，Dick!howsplendidtohaveanidealtolookupto!WriteatoncetoBrewer\'sHotelandtellmeyouthinkthesame……WearriveatCharingCrossonSundayathalf-pastseven，stayatBrewer\'sforacoupleofnights，andgodownonTuesdaytoHolmOaks。

AlwaysyourANTONIA。

"To-morrow!"hethought；"she\'scomingtomorrow!"and，leavinghisneglectedbreakfast，hestartedouttowalkoffhisemotion。Hissquareranintooneofthoseslumsthatstillrubshoulderswiththemostdistinguishedsituations，andinithecameuponalittlecrowdassembledroundadogfight。Oneofthedogswasbeingmauled，butthedaywasmuddy，andShelton，likeanywell-bredEnglishman，hadahorrorofmakinghimselfconspicuouseveninadecentcause；helookedforapoliceman。Onewasstandingby，toseefairplay，andSheltonmadeappealtohim。Theofficialsuggestedthatheshouldnothavebroughtoutafightingdog，andadvisedhimtothrowcoldwateroverthem。

"Itisn\'tmydog，"saidShelton。

"ThenIshouldlet\'embe，"remarkedthepolicemanwithevidentsurprise。

Sheltonappealedindefinitelytothelowerorders。Thelowerorders，however，wereafraidofbeingbitten。

"Iwouldn\'tmeddlewiththattherejobifIwasyou，"saidone。

"Nastybreedo\'dawgisthat。"

Hewasthereforeobligedtocastawayrespectability，spoilhistrousersandhisgloves，breakhisumbrella，drophishatinthemud，andseparatethedogs。Attheconclusionofthe"job，"thelowerorderssaidtohiminarathershamefacedspanner:

"Well，Ineverthoughtyou\'dhavemanagedthat，sir"；but，likeallmenofinaction，Sheltonafteractionwasmoredangerous。

"D——nit!"hesaid，"onecan\'tletadogbekilled"；andhemarchedoff，towingtheinjureddogwithhispocket-handkerchief，andlookingscornfullyatharmlesspassers-by。Havingsatisfiedforoncethesmoulderingfireswithinhim，hefeltentitledtoholdalowopinionofthesemeninthestreet。"Thebrutes，"hethought，"won\'tstirafingertosaveapoordumbcreature，andasforpolicemen——"

But，growingcooler，hebegantoseethatpeopleweighteddownby"honesttoil"couldnotaffordtoteartheirtrousersorgetabittenhand，andthateventhepoliceman，thoughhehadlookedsolikeademi-god，wasabsolutelymadeoffleshandblood。Hetookthedoghome，and，sendingforavet。，hadhimsewnup。

HewasalreadytorturedbythedoubtwhetherornohemightventuretomeetAntoniaatthestation，and，aftersendinghisservantwiththedogtotheaddressmarkedonitscollar，heformedtheresolvetogoandseehismother，withsomevaguenotionthatshemighthelphimtodecide。ShelivedinKensington，and，crossingtheBromptonRoad，hewassoonamongstthatmazeofhousesintothefibreofwhosestructurearchitectshavewroughtthemotto:"Keepwhatyouhave——

wives，money，agoodaddress，andalltheblessingsofamoralstate!"

Sheltonponderedashepassedhouseafterhouseofsuchintenserespectabilitythatevendogswereknowntobarkatthem。Hisbloodwasstilltoohot；itisamazingwhatincidentswillpromotetheloftiestphilosophy。Hehadbeenreadinginhisfavouritereviewanarticleeulogisingthefreedomandexpansionwhichhadmadetheuppermiddleclasssofineabody；andwitheyeswanderingfromsidetosidehenoddedhisheadironically。"Expansionandfreedom，"ranhisthoughts:"Freedomandexpansion!"

Eachhouse-frontwascoldandformal，theshellofanownerwithfromthreetofivethousandpoundsayear，andeachonewasarmouredagainsttheopinionofitsneighboursbyasortofdaringregularity。

"Consciousofmyrectitude；andbythestrictobservanceofexactlywhatisnecessaryandnomore，Iamenabledtoholdmyheadupintheworld。Thepersonwholivesinmehasonlyfourthousandtwohundredandfifty-fivepoundseachyear，afterallowingfortheincometax。"

Suchseemedthelegendofthesehouses。

Sheltonpassedladiesinonesandtwosandthreesgoingoutshopping，ortoclassesofdrawing，cooking，ambulance。Hardlyanymenwereseen，andtheyweremostlypolicemen；butafewdisillusionedchildrenwerebeingwheeledtowardstheParkbyfresh-cheekednurses，accompaniedbyagreatarmyofhairyorofhairlessdogs。

Therewassomethingofherbrother\'slargeliberalityaboutMrs。

Shelton，atinyladywithaffectionateeyes，warmcheeks，andchillyfeet；fondasacatofachairbythefire，andfullofthesympathythathasnoinsight。Shekissedhersonatoncewithrapture，and，asusual，begantotalkofhisengagement。Forthefirsttimeatremorofdoubtranthroughherson；hismother\'sviewofitgratedonhimlikethesightofablue-pinkdress；itwastoorosy。Hersplendidoptimism，dampedhim；ithadtoolittletrafficwiththereasoningpowers。

"Whatright，"heaskedhimself，"hasshetobesocertain？Itseemstomeakindofblasphemy。"

"Thedear!"shecooed。"Andsheiscomingbackto-morrow？Hurrah!

howIlongtoseeher!"

"Butyouknow，mother，we\'veagreednottomeetagainuntilJuly。"

Mrs。Sheltonrockedherfoot，and，holdingherheadononesidelikealittlebird，lookedathersonwithshiningeyes。

"DearoldDick!"shesaid，"howhappyyoumustbe!"

Halfacenturyofsympathywithweddingsofallsorts——good，bad，indifferent——beamedfromher。

"Isuppose，"saidSheltongloomily，"Ioughtnottogoandseeheratthestation。"

"Cheerup!"repliedthemother，andhersonfeltdreadfullydepressed。

That"Cheer-up!"——thepanaceawhichhadcarriedherblindandbrightthrougheveryevil——wasasvoidofmeaningtohimaswinewithoutaflavour。

"Andhowisyoursciatica？"heasked。

"Oh，prettybad，"returnedhismother；"Iexpectit\'sallright，really。Cheerup!"Shestretchedherlittlefigure，cantingherheadstillmore。

"Wonderfulwoman!"Sheltonthought。Shehad，infact，likemanyofherfellow-countrymen，mislaidthedarkersideofthings，and，enjoyingthebenefitsoforthodoxywithaneasyconscience，hadkeptasyounginheartasanygirlofthirty。

SheltonleftherhouseasdoubtfulwhetherhemightmeetAntoniaaswhenheenteredit。Hespentarestlessafternoon。

Thenextday——thatofherarrival——wasaSunday。HehadmadeFerrandapromisetogowithhimtohearasermonintheslums，and，catchingatanydiversionwhichmightallayexcitement，hefulfilledit。Thepreacherinquestion——anamateur，soFerrandtoldhim——hadanoriginalmethodofdistributingthefundsthatheobtained。Tomalesheephegavenothing，touglyfemalesheepaverylittle，toprettyfemalesheeptherest。Ferrandhazardedaninference，buthewasaforeigner。TheEnglishmanpreferredtolookuponthepreacherasguidedbyapurelyabstractloveofbeauty。Hiseloquence，atanyrate，wasunquestionable，andSheltoncameoutfeelingsick。

Itwasnotyetseveno\'clock，so，enteringanItalianrestauranttokillthehalf-hourbeforeAntonia\'sarrival，heorderedabottleofwineforhiscompanion，acupofcoffeeforhimself，and，lightingacigarette，compressedhislips。Therewasastrange，sweetsinkinginhisheart。Hiscompanion，ignorantofthisemotion，drankhiswine，crumbledhisroll，andblewsmokethroughhisnostrils，glancingcausticallyattherowsoflittletables，thecheapmirrors，thehot，redvelvet，thechandeliers。Hisjuicylipsseemedtobemurmuring，"Ah!ifyouonlyknewofthedirtbehindthesefeathers!"

Sheltonwatchedhimwithdisgust。Thoughhisclotheswerenowsonice，hisnailswerenotquiteclean，andhisfingertipsseemedyellowtothebone。Ananaemicwaiterinashirtsomefourdaysold，withgrease-spotsonhisgarmentsandacrumplednapkinonhisarm，stoodleaninganelbowamongstdoubtfulfruits，andreadinganItalianjournal。Restinghistiredfeetinturn，helookedlikeoverworkpersonified，andwhenhemoved，eachlimbaccusedthesordidsmartnessofthewalls。Inthefarcornersataladyeating，and，mirroredopposite，herfeatheredhat，hershort，roundface，itscoatofpowder，anddarkeyes，gaveSheltonashiverofdisgust。Hiscompanion\'sgazerestedlongandsubtlyonher。

"Excuseme，monsieur，"hesaidatlength。"IthinkIknowthatlady!"And，leavinghishost，hecrossedtheroom，bowed，accostedher，andsatdown。WithPharisaicdelicacy，Sheltonrefrainedfromlooking。ButpresentlyFerrandcameback；theladyroseandlefttherestaurant；shehadbeencrying。Theyoungforeignerwasflushed，hisfacecontorted；hedidnottouchhiswine。

"Iwasright，"hesaid；"sheisthewifeofanoldfriend。Iusedtoknowherwell。"

Hewassufferingfromemotion，butsomeonelessabsorbedthanSheltonmighthavenoticedakindofrelishinhisvoice，asthoughheweresavouringlife\'sdishes，andgladtohavesomethingnew，andspicedwithtragicsauce，tosetbeforehispatron。

"Youcanfindherstorybythehundredinyourstreets，butnothinghinderstheseparagonsofvirtue"——henoddedatthestreamofcarriages——"fromturninguptheireyeswhentheyseeladiesofhersortpass。ShecametoLondon——justthreeyearsago。Afterayearoneofherlittleboystookfever——theshopwasavoided——herhusbandcaughtit，anddied。Thereshewas，leftwithtwochildrenandeverythinggonetopaythedebts。Shetriedtogetwork；noonehelpedher。Therewasnomoneytopayanyonetostaywiththechildren；alltheworkshecouldgetinthehousewasnotenoughtokeepthemalive。She\'snotastrongwoman。Well，sheputthechildrenouttonurse，andwenttothestreets。Thefirstweekwasfrightful，butnowshe\'susedtoit——onegetsusedtoanything。"

"Cannothingbedone？"askedShelton，startled。

"No，"returnedhiscompanion。"Iknowthatsort；iftheyoncetaketoitall\'sover。Theygetusedtoluxury。Onedoesn\'tpartwithluxury，aftertastingdestitution。Shetellsmeshedoesverynicely；thechildrenarehappy；she\'sabletopaywellandseethemsometimes。Shewasagirlofgoodfamily，too，wholovedherhusband，andgaveupmuchforhim。Whatwouldyouhave？Threequartersofyourvirtuousladiesplacedinherpositionwoulddothesameiftheyhadthenecessarylooks。"

Itwasevidentthathefelttheshockofthisdiscovery，andSheltonunderstoodthatpersonalacquaintancemakesadifference，eveninavagabond。

"Thisisherbeat，"saidtheyoungforeigner，astheypassedtheilluminatedcrescent，wherenightlytheshadowsofhypocritesandwomenfall；andSheltonwentfromthesecommentsonChristianitytothestationofCharingCross。There，ashestoodwaitingintheshadow，hisheartwasinhismouth；anditstruckhimasoddthatheshouldhavecometothismeetingfreshfromavagabond\'ssociety。

Presently，amongstthestreamoftravellers，hesawAntonia。Shewasclosetohermother，whowasparleyingwithafootman；behindthemwereamaidcarryingabandboxandaporterwiththetravelling-bags。

Antonia\'sfigure，withitsthroatsettledinthecollarofhercape，slender，tall，severe，lookedimpatientandremoteamongstthebustle。Hereyes，shadowedbythejourney，glancedeagerlyabout，welcomingallshesaw；awispofhairwaslooseaboveherear，hercheeksglowedcoldandrosy。ShecaughtsightofShelton，andbendingherneck，stag-like，stoodlookingathim；abrilliantsmilepartedherlips，andSheltontrembled。Herewastheembodimentofallhehaddesiredforweeks。Hecouldnottellwhatwasbehindthatsmileofhers——passionateachingoronlysomeideal，somechasteandglacialintangibility。Itseemedtobeshiningpasthimintothegloomystation。Therewasnotremblinganduncertainty，norageofpossessioninthatbrilliantsmile；ithadthegleamoffixedness，likethesmilingofastar。Whatdiditmatter？Shewasthere，beautifulasayoungday，andsmilingathim；andshewashis，onlydividedfromhimbyaspaceoftime。Hetookastep；hereyesfellatonce，herfaceregainedaloofness；hesawher，encircledbymother，footman，maid，andporter，takeherseatanddriveaway。

Itwasover；shehadseenhim，shehadsmiled，butalongsidehisdelightlurkedanotherfeeling，and，byabitterfreak，notherfacecameupbeforehimbutthefaceofthatladyintherestaurant——

short，round，andpowdered，withblack-circledeyes。Whatrighthadwetoscornthem？Hadtheymothers，footmen，porters，maids？Heshivered，butthistimewithphysicaldisgust；thepowderedfacewithdark-fringedeyeshadvanished；thefair，remotefigureoftherailway-stationcamebackagain。

Hesatlongoverdinner，drinking，dreaming；hesatlongafter，smoking，dreaming，andwhenatlengthhedroveaway，wineanddreamsfumedinhisbrain。Thedanceoflamps，thecream-cheesemoon，theraysofcleanwetlightonhishorse\'sharness，thejinglingofthecabbell，thewhirringwheels，thenightairandthebranches——itwasallsogood!Hethrewbackthehansomdoorstofeelthetouchofthewarmbreeze。Thecrowdsonthepavementgavehimstrangedelight；

theywerelikeshadows，insomegreatillusion，happyshadows，thronging，wheelingroundthesinglefigureofhisworld。

CHAPTERXII

ROTTENROW

Withaheadacheandasenseofrestlessness，hopefulandunhappy，SheltonmountedhishacknextmorningforagallopinthePark。

Intheskywasmingledallthelanguorandtheviolenceofthespring。Thetreesandflowersworeanawakenedlookinthegleamsoflightthatcamestealingdownfrombehindthepurpleoftheclouds。

Theairwasrain-washed，andthepassersbyseemedtowearanairoftranquilcarelessness，asifanxietywereparalysedbytheirresponsibilityofthefirmament。

Throngedbyriders，theRowwasallastir。

NeartoHydeParkCornerafigurebytherailscaughtShelton\'seye。

Straightandthin，oneshoulderhumpedalittle，asifitsownerwerereflecting，clothedinafrock-coatandabrownfelthatpinchedupinlawlessfashion，thisfigurewassodetachedfromitssurroundingsthatitwouldhavebeennoticeableanywhere。ItbelongedtoFerrand，obviouslywaitingtillitwastimetobreakfastwithhispatron。

Sheltonfoundpleasureinthusobservinghimunseen，andsatquietlyonhishorse，hiddenbehindatree。

Itwasjustatthatspotwhereriders，unabletogetfurther，areforeverwheelingtheirhorsesforanotherturn；andthereFerrand，thebirdofpassage，withhisheadalittletooneside，watchedthemcantering，trotting，wheelingupanddown。

Threemenwalkingalongtherailsweresnatchingofftheirhatsbeforeahorsewomanatexactlythesameangleandwithpreciselythesameair，asthoughinthemodishperformanceofthisancientritetheyweresatisfyingsomeinstinctverydeartothem。

SheltonnotedthecurlofFerrand\'slipashewatchedthissight。

"Manythanks，gentlemen，"itseemedtosay；"inthatcharminglittleactionyouhaveshownmeallyoursouls。"

Whatasingulargiftthefellowhadofdivestingthingsandpeopleoftheirgarments，oftearingawaytheirveilofshams，andtheirphylacteries!Sheltonturnedandcanteredon；histhoughtswerewithAntonia，andhedidnotwanttheglamourstrippedaway。

Hewasglancingatthesky，thateverymomentthreatenedtodischargeaviolentshowerofrain，whensuddenlyheheardhisnamecalledfrombehind，andwhoshouldrideuptohimoneithersidebutBillDennantand——Antoniaherself!

Theyhadbeengalloping；andshewasflushed——flushedaswhenshestoodontheoldtoweratHyeres，butwithajoyfulradiancedifferentfromthecalmandconqueringradianceofthatothermoment。

ToShelton\'sdelighttheyfellintolinewithhim，andallthreewentgallopingalongthestripbetweenthetreesandrails。Thelookshegavehimseemedtosay，"Idon\'tcareifitisforbidden!"butshedidnotspeak。Hecouldnottakehiseyesoffher。Howlovelyshelooked，withtheresolutecurveofherfigure，theglimpseofgoldunderherhat，thegloriouscolourinhercheeks，asifshehadbeenkissed。

"It\'ssosplendidtobeathome!Let\'sgofaster，faster!"shecriedout。

"Takeapull。Weshallgetrunin，"grumbledherbrother，withachuckle。

Theyreinedinroundthebendandjoggedmoresoberlydownonthefarside；stillnotawordfromhertoShelton，andSheltoninhisturnspokeonlytoBillDennant。Hewasafraidtospeaktoher，forheknewthathermindwasdwellingonthischanceforbiddenmeetinginawayquitedifferentfromhisown。

ApproachingHydeParkCorner，whereFerrandwasstillstandingagainsttherails，Shelton，whohadforgottenhisexistence，sufferedashockwhenhiseyesfellsuddenlyonthatimpassivefigure。Hewasabouttoraisehishand，whenhesawthattheyoungforeigner，notinghisinstinctivefeeling，hadatonceadaptedhimselftoit。Theypassedagainwithoutagreeting，unlessthatswiftinquisition；

followedbyunconsciousnessinFerrand\'seyes，couldsobecalled。

ButthefeelingofidiotichappinessleftShelton；hegrewirritatedatthissilence。Ittantalisedhimmoreandmore，forBillDennanthadlaggedbehindtochattertoafriend；SheltonandAntoniawerealone，walkingtheirhorses，withoutaword，notevenlookingateachother。Atonemomenthethoughtofgallopingaheadandleavingher，thenofbreakingthevowofmutenesssheseemedtobeimposingonhim，andhekeptthinking:"Itoughttobeeitheronethingortheother。Ican\'tstandthis。"Hercalmnesswasgettingonhisnerves；

sheseemedtohavedeterminedjusthowfarshemeanttogo，tohavefixedcold-bloodedlyalimit。InherhappyyoungbeautyandradiantcoolnessshesummedupthatsaneconsistentsomethingexistinginnineoutoftenofthepeopleSheltonknew。"Ican\'tstanditlong，"

hethought，andallofasuddenspoke；butashedidsoshefrownedandcanteredon。Whenhecaughthershewassmiling，liftingherfacetocatchtheraindropswhichwerefallingfast。Shegavehimjustanod，andwavedherhandasasignforhimtogo；andwhenhewouldnot，shefrowned。HesawBillDennant，postingafterthem，and，seizedbyasenseoftheridiculous，liftedhishat，andgallopedoff。

Therainwascomingdownintorrentsnow，andeveryonewasscurryingforshelter。Helookedbackfromthebend，andcouldstillmakeoutAntoniaridingleisurely，herfaceupturned，andrevellingintheshower。Whyhadn\'tsheeithercuthimaltogetherortakenthesweetsthegodshadsent？Itseemedwickedtohavewastedsuchachance，and，ploughingbacktoHydeParkCorner，heturnedhisheadtoseeifbyanychanceshehadrelented。

Hisirritationwassoongone，buthislongingstayed。Waseveranythingsobeautifulasshehadlookedwithherfaceturnedtotherain？Sheseemedtolovetherain。Itsuitedher——suitedhereversomuchbetterthanthesunshineoftheSouth。Yes，shewasveryEnglish!Puzzlingandfretting，hereachedhisrooms。Ferrandhadnotarrived，infactdidnotturnupthatday。Hisnon-appearanceaffordedSheltonanotherproofofthedelicacythatwenthandinhandwiththeyoungvagrant\'scynicism。Intheafternoonhereceivedanote。