第38章

shillingpieceandtheseragsonmyback。WhatrespectableinnkeeperwouldtakeMEintohishouse？Iwalkedabout，wonderinghowIcouldfindmywayoutoftheworldwithoutdisfiguringmyself，andwithoutsufferingmuchpain。Youhavenoriverintheseparts。Ididn’tseemywayoutoftheworld，tillIheardyouringingatthedoctor’shouse。Igotaglimpseatthebottlesinthesurgery，whenheletyouin，andIthoughtofthelaudanumdirectly。Whatwereyoudoingthere？Whoisthatmedicinefor？

Yourwife？“

“Iamnotmarried！“

Shelaughedagain。“Notmarried！IfIwasalittlebetterdressedtheremightbeachanceforME。Wheredoyoulive？Here？“

Wehadarrived，bythistime，atmymother’sdoor。Sheheldoutherhandtosaygood-by。Houselessandhomelessasshewas，sheneveraskedmetogiveherashelterforthenight。ItwasMY

proposalthatsheshouldrest，undermyroof，unknowntomymotherandmyaunt。Ourkitchenwasbuiltoutatthebackofthecottage:

shemightremainthereunseenandunhearduntilthehouseholdwasastirinthemorning。Iledherintothekitchen，andsetachairforherbythedyingembersofthefire。IdaresayIwastoblame——shamefullytoblame，ifyoulike。IonlywonderwhatYOU

wouldhavedoneinmyplace。Onyourwordofhonorasaman，wouldYOUhaveletthatbeautifulcreaturewanderbacktotheshelterofthestonequarrylikeastraydog？Godhelpthewomanwhoisfoolishenoughtotrustandloveyou，ifyouwouldhavedonethat！

Ileftherbythefire，andwenttomymother’sroom。

Ifyouhaveeverfelttheheartache，youwillknowwhatIsufferedinsecretwhenmymothertookmyhand，andsaid，“Iamsorry，Francis，thatyournight’sresthasbeendisturbedthroughME。“I

gaveherthemedicine；andIwaitedbyhertillthepainsabated。

MyauntChancewentbacktoherbed；andmymotherandIwereleftalone。Inoticedthatherwriting-desk，movedfromitscustomaryplace，wasonthebedbyherside。Shesawmelookingatit。

“Thisisyourbirthday，Francis，“shesaid。“Haveyouanythingtotellme？“IhadsocompletelyforgottenmyDream，thatIhadnonotionofwhatwaspassinginhermindwhenshesaidthosewords。

Foramomenttherewasaguiltyfearinmethatshesuspectedsomething。Iturnedawaymyface，andsaid，“No，mother；Ihavenothingtotell。“Shesignedtometostoopdownoverthepillowandkissher。“Godblessyou，mylove！“shesaid；andmanyhappyreturnsoftheday。“Shepattedmyhand，andclosedherwearyeyes，and，littlebylittle，felloffpeaceablyintosleep。

Istoledownstairsagain。Ithinkthegoodinfluenceofmymothermusthavefollowedmedown。Atanyrate，thisistrue:Istoppedwithmyhandontheclosedkitchendoor，andsaidtomyself:

“SupposeIleavethehouse，andleavethevillage，withoutseeingherorspeakingtohermore？“

ShouldIreallyhavefledfromtemptationinthisway，ifIhadbeenlefttomyselftodecide？Whocantell？Asthingswere，I

wasnotlefttodecide。Whilemydoubtwasinmymind，sheheardme，andopenedthekitchendoor。Myeyesandhereyesmet。Thatendedit。

Weweretogether，unsuspectedandundisturbed，forthenexttwohours。Timeenoughforhertorevealthesecretofherwastedlife。Timeenoughforhertotakepossessionofmeasherown，todowithmeassheliked。Itisneedlesstodwellhereonthemisfortuneswhichhadbroughtherlow；theyaremisfortunestoocommontointerestanybody。

HernamewasAliciaWarlock。Shehadbeenbornandbredalady。

Shehadlostherstation，hercharacter，andherfriends。Virtueshudderedatthesightofher；andVicehadgotherfortherestofherdays。Shockingandcommon，asItoldyou。ItmadenodifferencetoME。Ihavesaiditalready——Isayitagain——Iwasamanbewitched。Isthereanythingsoverywonderfulinthat？JustrememberwhoIwas。Amongthehonestwomeninmyownstationinlife，wherecouldIhavefoundthelikeofHER？CouldTHEYwalkasshewalked？andlookasshelooked？WhenTHEYgavemeakiss，didtheirlipslingeroveritashersdid？HadTHEYherskin，herlaugh，herfoot，herhand，hertouch？SHEneverhadaspeckofdirtonher:Itellyouherfleshwasaperfume。Whensheembracedme，herarmsfoldedroundmelikethewingsofangels；andhersmilecoveredmesoftlywithitslightlikethesuninheaven。I

leaveyoutolaughatme，ortocryoverme，j

后续内容为VIP可读请开通VIP，或购买此章节