第4章

FromthencetheyproceededtotheStraits，enteredtheMediterranean，andatlengtharrivedatVenice。

"Godbepraised"，saidCandide，embracingMartin，"thisistheplacewhereIamtobeholdmybelovedCunegondeonceagain。IcanconfideinCacambo，likeanotherself。Alliswell，allisverywell，alliswellaspossible。"

chapter24CHAPTERXXIV

OFPACQUETTEANDFRIARGIROFLEE

UpontheirarrivalatVeniceCandidewentinsearchofCacamboateveryinnandcoffee-house，andamongalltheladiesofpleasure，butcouldhearnothingofhim。Hesenteverydaytoinquirewhatshipswerein，stillnonewsofCacambo。

"Itisstrange"，saidhetoMartin，"verystrangethatIshouldhavetimetosailfromSurinamtoBordeaux;totravelthencetoParis，toDieppe，toPortsmouth;tosailalongthecoastofPortugalandSpain，anduptheMediterraneantospendsomemonthsatVenice;andthatmylovelyCunegondeshouldnothavearrived。Insteadofher，IonlymetwithaParisianimpostor，andarascallyabbeofPerigord。Cunegondeisactuallydead，andIhavenothingtodobutfollowher。Alas！howmuchbetterwouldithavebeenformetohaveremainedintheparadiseofElDoradothantohavereturnedtothiscursedEurope！Youareintheright，mydearMartin;

youarecertainlyintheright;allismiseryanddeceit。"

Hefellintoadeepmelancholy，andneitherwenttotheoperatheninvogue，norpartookofanyofthediversionsoftheCarnival;

nay，heevenslightedthefairsex。

Martinsaidtohim，"Uponmyword，Ithinkyouareverysimpletoimaginethatarascallyvalet，withfiveorsixmillionsinhispocket，wouldgoinsearchofyourmistresstothefurtheroftheworld，andbringhertoVenicetomeetyou。Ifhefindsherhewilltakeherforhimself;ifhedoesnot，hewilltakeanother。LetmeadviseyoutoforgetyourvaletCacambo，andyourmistressCunegonde。"

Martin’sspeechwasnotthemostconsolatorytothedejectedCandide。Hismelancholyincreased，andMartinneverceasedtryingtoprovetohimthatthereisverylittlevirtueorhappinessinthisworld;

except，perhaps，inElDorado，wherehardlyanybodycangainadmittance。

Whiletheyweredisputingonthisimportantsubject，andstillexpectingMissCunegonde，CandideperceivedayoungTheatinfriarinthePiazzaSanMarco，withagirlunderhisarm。TheTheatinlookedfresh-colored，plump，andvigorous;hiseyessparkled;hisairandgaitwereboldandlofty。Thegirlwaspretty，andwassingingasong;andeverynowandthengaveherTheatinanamorousogleandwantonlypinchedhisruddycheeks。

"Youwillatleastallow"，saidCandidetoMartin，"thatthesetwoarehappy。

HithertoIhavemetwithnonebutunfortunatepeopleinthewholehabitableglobe，exceptinElDorado;butastothiscouple，Iwouldventuretolayawagertheyarehappy。"

"Done！"saidMartin，"theyarenotwhatyouimagine。"

"Well，wehaveonlytoaskthemtodinewithus"，saidCandide，"andyouwillseewhetherIammistakenornot。"

Thereuponheaccostedthem，andwithgreatpolitenessinvitedthemtohisinntoeatsomemacaroni，withLombardpartridgesandcaviar，andtodrinkabottleofMontepulciano，LacrymaChristi，Cyprus，andSamoswine。Thegirlblushed;theTheatinacceptedtheinvitationandshefollowedhim，eyeingCandideeverynowandthenwithamixtureofsurpriseandconfusion，whilethetearsstoledownhercheeks。Nosoonerdidsheenterhisapartmentthanshecriedout，"How，MonsieurCandide，haveyouquiteforgotyourPacquette？doyounotknowheragain？"

Candidehadnotregardedherwithanydegreeofattentionbefore，beingwhollyoccupiedwiththethoughtsofhisdearCunegonde。

"Ah！isityou，child？wasityouthatreducedDr。PanglosstothatfineconditionIsawhimin？"

"Alas！sir"，answeredPacquette，"itwasI，indeed。Ifindyouareacquaintedwitheverything;andIhavebeeninformedofallthemisfortunesthathappenedtothewholefamilyofMyLadyBaronessandthefairCunegonde。ButIcansafelysweartoyouthatmylotwasnolessdeplorable;Iwasinnocenceitselfwhenyousawmelast。

AFranciscan，whowasmyconfessor，easilyseducedme;theconsequencesprovedterrible。I

wasobligedtoleavethecastlesometimeaftertheBaronkickedyououtbythebacksidefromthere;andifafamoussurgeonhadnottakencompassiononme，Ihadbeenadeadwoman。Gratitudeobligedmetolivewithhimsometimeashismistress;hiswife，whowasaverydevilforjealousy，beatmeunmercifullyeveryday。Oh！shewasaperfectfury。Thedoctorhimselfwasthemostuglyofallmortals，andI

themostwretchedcreatureexisting，tobecontinuallybeatenforamanwhomIdidnotlove。

Youaresensible，sir，howdangerousitwasforanill-naturedwomantobemarriedtoaphysician。Incensedatthebehaviorofhiswife，heonedaygavehersoaffectionatearemedyforaslightcoldshehadcaughtthatshediedinlessthantwohoursinmostdreadfulconvulsions。

Herrelationsprosecutedthehusband，whowasobligedtofly，andI

wassenttoprison。

Myinnocencewouldnothavesavedme，ifIhadnotbeentolerablyhandsome。Thejudgegavememylibertyonconditionheshouldsucceedthedoctor。However，Iwassoonsupplantedbyarival，turnedoffwithoutafarthing，andobligedtocontinuetheabominabletradewhichyoumenthinksopleasing，butwhichtousunhappycreaturesisthemostdreadfulofallsufferings。AtlengthIcametofollowthebusinessatVenice。Ah！sir，didyoubutknowwhatitistobeobligedtoreceiveeveryvisitor;oldtradesmen，counselors，monks，watermen，andabbes;tobeexposedtoalltheirinsolenceandabuse;tobeoftennecessitatedtoborrowapetticoat，onlythatitmaybetakenupbysomedisagreeablewretch;toberobbedbyonegallantofwhatwegetfromanother;tobesubjecttotheextortionsofcivilmagistrates;andtohaveforeverbeforeone’seyestheprospectofoldage，ahospital，oradunghill，youwouldconcludethatIamoneofthemostunhappywretchesbreathing。"

ThusdidPacquetteunbosomherselftohonestCandideinhiscloset，inthepresenceofMartin，whotookoccasiontosaytohim，"YouseeIhavehalfwonthewageralready。"

FriarGirofleewasallthistimeintheparlorrefreshinghimselfwithaglassortwoofwinetilldinnerwasready。

"But"，saidCandidetoPacquette，"youlookedsogayandcontented，whenI

metyou，yousangandcaressedtheTheatinwithsomuchfondness，thatI

absolutelythoughtyouashappyasyousayyouarenowmiserable。"

"Ah！dearsir"，saidPacquette，"thisisoneofthemiseriesofthetrade;

yesterdayIwasstrippedandbeatenbyanofficer;yettodayImustappeargoodhumoredandgaytopleaseafriar。"

CandidewasconvincedandacknowledgedthatMartinwasintheright。

TheysatdowntotablewithPacquetteandtheTheatin;

theentertainmentwasagreeable，andtowardstheendtheybegantoconversetogetherwithsomefreedom。

"Father"，saidCandidetothefriar，"youseemtometoenjoyastateofhappinessthatevenkingsmightenvy;joyandhealtharepaintedinyourcountenance。Youhaveaprettywenchtodivertyou;andyouseemtobeperfectlywellcontentedwithyourconditionasaTheatin。"

"Faith，sir"，saidFriarGiroflee，"IwishwithallmysoultheTheatinswereeveryoneofthematthebottomofthesea。IhavebeentemptedathousandtimestosetfiretothemonasteryandgoandturnTurk。

Myparentsobligedme，attheageoffifteen，toputonthisdetestablehabitonlytoincreasethefortuneofanelderbrotherofmine，whomGodconfound！

jealousy，discord，andfury，resideinourmonastery。ItistrueIhavepreachedoftenpaltrysermons，bywhichIhavegotalittlemoney，partofwhichthepriorrobsmeof，andtheremainderhelpstopaymygirls;but，notwithstanding，atnight，whenIgohencetomymonastery，Iamreadytodashmybrainsagainstthewallsofthedormitory;andthisisthecasewithalltherestofourfraternity。"

Martin，turningtowardsCandide，withhisusualindifference，said，"Well，whatthinkyounow？haveIwonthewagerentirely？"

CandidegavetwothousandpiastrestoPacquette，andathousandtoFriarGiroflee，saying，"Iwillanswerthatthiswillmakethemhappy。"

"Iamnotofyouropinion"，saidMartin，"perhapsthismoneywillonlymakethemwretched。"

"Bethatasitmay"，saidCandide，"onethingcomfortsme;Iseethatoneoftenmeetswiththosewhomoneneverexpectedtoseeagain;sothat，perhaps，asIhavefoundmyredsheepandPacquette，I

maybeluckyenoughtofindMissCunegondealso。"

"Iwish"，saidMartin，"sheonedaymaymakeyouhappy;

butIdoubtitmuch。"

"Youlackfaith"，saidCandide。

"Itisbecause"，saidMartin，"Ihaveseentheworld。"

"Observethosegondoliers"，saidCandide，"aretheynotperpetuallysinging？"

"Youdonotseethem"，answeredMartin，"athomewiththeirwivesandbrats。Thedogehashischagrin，gondolierstheirs。Nevertheless，inthemain，Ilookuponthegondolier’slifeaspreferabletothatofthedoge;butthedifferenceissotriflingthatitisnotworththetroubleofexamininginto。"

"Ihaveheardgreattalk"，saidCandide，"oftheSenatorPococurante，wholivesinthatfinehouseattheBrenta，where，theysay，heentertainsforeignersinthemostpolitemanner。"

"Theypretendthismanisaperfectstrangertouneasiness。

Ishouldbegladtoseesoextraordinaryabeing"，saidMartin。

CandidethereuponsentamessengertoSeignorPococurante，desiringpermissiontowaitonhimthenextday。

chapter25CHAPTERXXV

CANDIDEANDMARTINPAYAVISIT

TOSEIGNOR

POCOCURANTE，ANOBLEVENETIAN

CandideandhisfriendMartinwentinagondolaontheBrenta，andarrivedatthepalaceofthenoblePococurante。Thegardenswerelaidoutineleganttaste，andadornedwithfinemarblestatues;hispalacewasbuiltafterthemostapprovedrulesofarchitecture。Themasterofthehouse，whowasamanofaffairs，andveryrich，receivedourtwotravelerswithgreatpoliteness，butwithoutmuchceremony，whichsomewhatdisconcertedCandide，butwasnotatalldispleasingtoMartin。

Assoonastheywereseated，twoveryprettygirls，neatlydressed，broughtinchocolate，whichwasextremelywellprepared。Candidecouldnothelppraisingtheirbeautyandgracefulcarriage。

"Thecreaturesareallright"，saidthesenator;"Iamusemyselfwiththemsometimes，forIamheartilytiredofthewomenofthetown，theircoquetry，theirjealousy，theirquarrels，theirhumors，theirmeannesses，theirpride，andtheirfolly;Iamwearyofmakingsonnets，orofpayingforsonnetstobemadeonthem;butafterall，thesetwogirlsbegintogrowveryindifferenttome。"

Afterhavingrefreshedhimself，Candidewalkedintoalargegallery，wherehewasstruckwiththesightofafinecollectionofpaintings。

"Pray"，saidCandide，"bywhatmasterarethetwofirstofthese？"

"TheyarebyRaphael"，answeredthesenator。"Igaveagreatdealofmoneyforthemsevenyearsago，purelyoutofcuriosity，astheyweresaidtobethefinestpiecesinItaly;butIcannotsaytheypleaseme：thecoloringisdarkandheavy;thefiguresdonotswellnorcomeoutenough;andthedraperyisbad。Inshort，notwithstandingtheencomiumslavisheduponthem，theyarenot，inmyopinion，atruerepresentationofnature。IapproveofnopaintingssavethosewhereinIthinkIbeholdnatureitself;andtherearefew，ifany，ofthatkindtobemetwith。Ihavewhatiscalledafinecollection，butItakenomannerofdelightinit。"

WhiledinnerwasbeingpreparedPococuranteorderedaconcert。

Candidepraisedthemusictotheskies。

"Thisnoise"，saidthenobleVenetian，"mayamuseoneforalittletime，butifitweretolastabovehalfanhour，itwouldgrowtiresometoeverybody，thoughperhapsnoonewouldcaretoownit。Musichasbecometheartofexecutingwhatisdifficult;now，whateverisdifficultcannotbelongpleasing。

"IbelieveImighttakemorepleasureinanopera，iftheyhadnotmadesuchamonsterofthatspeciesofdramaticentertainmentasperfectlyshocksme;

andIamamazedhowpeoplecanbeartoseewretchedtragediessettomusic;wherethescenesarecontrivedfornootherpurposethantolugin，asitwerebytheears，threeorfourridiculoussongs，togiveafavoriteactressanopportunityofexhibitingherpipe。LetwhowilldieawayinrapturesatthetrillsofaeunuchquaveringthemajesticpartofCaesarorCato，andstruttinginafoolishmanneruponthestage，butformypartI

havelongagorenouncedthesepaltryentertainments，whichconstitutethegloryofmodernItaly，andaresodearlypurchasedbycrownedheads。"

Candideopposedthesesentiments;buthediditinadiscreetmanner;asforMartin，hewasentirelyoftheoldsenator’sopinion。

Dinnerbeingservedtheysatdowntotable，and，afteraheartyrepast，returnedtothelibrary。Candide，observingHomerrichlybound，commendedthenobleVenetian’staste。

"This"，saidhe，"isabookthatwasoncethedelightofthegreatPangloss，thebestphilosopherinGermany。"

"Homerisnofavoriteofmine"，answeredPococurante，coolly，"IwasmadetobelieveoncethatItookapleasureinreadinghim;

buthiscontinualrepetitionsofbattleshaveallsucharesemblancewitheachother;hisgodsthatareforeverinhasteandbustle，withouteverdoinganything;hisHelen，whoisthecauseofthewar，andyethardlyactsinthewholeperformance;

hisTroy，thatholdsoutsolong，withoutbeingtaken：

inshort，allthesethingstogethermakethepoemveryinsipidtome。Ihaveaskedsomelearnedmen，whethertheyarenotinrealityasmuchtiredasmyselfwithreadingthispoet：thosewhospokeingenuously，assuredmethathehadmadethemfallasleep，andyetthattheycouldnotwellavoidgivinghimaplaceintheirlibraries;butthatitwasmerelyastheywoulddoanantique，orthoserustymedalswhicharekeptonlyforcuriosity，andareofnomannerofuseincommerce。"

"ButyourexcellencydoesnotsurelyformthesameopinionofVirgil？"saidCandide。

"Why，Igrant"，repliedPococurante，"thatthesecond，third，fourth，andsixthbooksofhisAeneid，areexcellent;butasforhispiousAeneas，hisstrongCloanthus，hisfriendlyAchates，hisboyAscanius，hissillykingLatinus，hisill-bredAmata，hisinsipidLavinia，andsomeothercharactersmuchinthesamestrain，Ithinktherecannotinnaturebeanythingmoreflatanddisagreeable。ImustconfessIpreferTassofarbeyondhim;nay，eventhatsleepytaletellerAriosto。"

"MayItakethelibertytoaskifyoudonotexperiencegreatpleasurefromreadingHorace？"saidCandide。

"Therearemaximsinthiswriter"，repliedPococurante，"whenceamanoftheworldmayreapsomebenefit;andtheshortmeasureoftheversemakesthemmoreeasilytoberetainedinthememory。ButIseenothingextraordinaryinhisjourneytoBrundusium，andhisaccountofhishaddinner;norinhisdirty，lowquarrelbetweenoneRupillius，whosewords，asheexpressesit，werefullofpoisonousfilth;andanother，whoselanguagewasdippedinvinegar。Hisindelicateversesagainstoldwomenandwitcheshavefrequentlygivenmegreatoffense：norcanIdiscoverthegreatmeritofhistellinghisfriendMaecenas，thatifhewillbutrankhimintheclassoflyricpoets，hisloftyheadshalltouchthestars。Ignorantreadersareapttojudgeawriterbyhisreputation。Formypart，Ireadonlytopleasemyself。I

likenothingbutwhatmakesformypurpose。"

Candide，whohadbeenbroughtupwithanotionofnevermakinguseofhisownjudgment，wasastonishedatwhatheheard;butMartinfoundtherewasagooddealofreasoninthesenator’sremarks。

"Oh！hereisaTully"，saidCandide;"thisgreatmanI

fancyyouarenevertiredofreading？"

"IndeedIneverreadhimatall"，repliedPococurante。

"WhatisittomewhetherhepleadsforRabiriusorCluentius？Itrycausesenoughmyself。I

hadoncesomelikingforhisphilosophicalworks;butwhenIfoundhedoubtedeverything，IthoughtIknewasmuchashimself，andhadnoneedofaguidetolearnignorance。"

"Ha！"criedMartin，"herearefourscorevolumesofthememoirsoftheAcademyofSciences;perhapstheremaybesomethingcuriousandvaluableinthiscollection。"

"Yes"，answeredPococurante，"sotheremightifanyoneofthesecompilersofthisrubbishhadonlyinventedtheartofpin-making;

butallthesevolumesarefilledwithmerechimericalsystems，withoutonesinglearticleconductivetorealutility。"

"Iseeaprodigiousnumberofplays"，saidCandide，"inItalian，Spanish，andFrench。"

"Yes"，repliedtheVenetian，"thereareIthinkthreethousand，andnotthreedozenofthemgoodforanything。Astothosehugevolumesofdivinity，andthoseenormouscollectionsofsermons，theyarenotalltogetherworthonesinglepageinSeneca;andIfancyyouwillreadilybelievethatneithermyself，noranyoneelse，everlooksintothem。"

Martin，perceivingsomeshelvesfilledwithEnglishbooks，saidtothesenator，"Ifancythatarepublicanmustbehighlydelightedwiththosebooks，whicharemostofthemwrittenwithanoblespiritoffreedom。"

"Itisnobletowriteaswethink"，saidPococurante;"itistheprivilegeofhumanity。ThroughoutItalywewriteonlywhatwedonotthink;andthepresentinhabitantsofthecountryoftheCaesarsandAntoninesdarenotacquireasingleideawithoutthepermissionofaDominicanfather。IshouldbeenamoredofthespiritoftheEnglishnation，diditnotutterlyfrustratethegoodeffectsitwouldproducebypassionandthespiritofparty。"

Candide，seeingaMilton，askedthesenatorifhedidnotthinkthatauthoragreatman。

"Who？"saidPococurantesharply;"thatbarbarianwhowritesatediouscommentaryintenbooksofrumblingverse，onthefirstchapterofGenesis？

thatslovenlyimitatoroftheGreeks，whodisfiguresthecreation，bymakingtheMessiahtakeapairofcompassesfromHeaven’sarmorytoplantheworld;whereasMosesrepresentedtheDietyasproducingthewholeuniversebyhisfiat？CanIthinkyouhaveanyesteemforawriterwhohasspoiledTasso’sHellandtheDevil;whotransformsLucifersometimesintoatoad，andatothersintoapygmy;whomakeshimsaythesamethingoveragainahundredtimes;whometamorphoseshimintoaschool-divine;

andwho，byanabsurdlyseriousimitationofAriosto’scomicinventionoffirearms，representsthedevilsandangelscannonadingeachotherinHeaven？NeitherInoranyotherItaliancanpossiblytakepleasureinsuchmelancholyreveries;butthemarriageofSinandDeath，andsnakesissuingfromthewomboftheformer，areenoughtomakeanypersonsickthatisnotlosttoallsenseofdelicacy。Thisobscene，whimsical，anddisagreeablepoemmetwiththeneglectitdeservedatitsfirstpublication;

andIonlytreattheauthornowashewastreatedinhisowncountrybyhiscontemporaries。"

Candidewassensiblygrievedatthisspeech，ashehadagreatrespectforHomer，andwasfondofMilton。

"Alas！"saidhesoftlytoMartin，"IamafraidthismanholdsourGermanpoetsingreatcontempt。"

"Therewouldbenosuchgreatharminthat"，saidMartin。

"Owhatasurprisingman！"saidCandide，stilltohimself;

"whataprodigiousgeniusisthisPococurante！nothingcanpleasehim。"

Afterfinishingtheirsurveyofthelibrary，theywentdownintothegarden，whenCandidecommendedtheseveralbeautiesthatofferedthemselvestohisview。

"Iknownothinguponearthlaidoutinsuchhadtaste"，saidPococurante;

"everythingaboutitischildishandtrifling;butIshallhaveanotherlaidouttomorrowuponanoblerplan。"

AssoonasourtwotravelershadtakenleaveofHisExcellency，CandidesaidtoMartin，"Well，Ihopeyouwillownthatthismanisthehappiestofallmortals，forheisaboveeverythinghepossesses。"

"Butdonotyousee"，answeredMartin，"thathelikewisedislikeseverythinghepossesses？ItwasanobservationofPlato，longsince，thatthosearenotthebeststomachsthatreject，withoutdistinction，allsortsofaliments。"

"True"，saidCandide，"butstilltheremustcertainlybeapleasureincriticisingeverything，andinperceivingfaultswhereothersthinktheyseebeauties。"

"Thatis"，repliedMartin，"thereisapleasureinhavingnopleasure。"

"Well，well"，saidCandide，"IfindthatIshallbetheonlyhappymanatlast，whenIamblessedwiththesightofmydearCunegonde。"

"Itisgoodtohope"，saidMartin。

Inthemeanwhile，daysandweekspassedaway，andnonewsofCacambo。

Candidewassooverwhelmedwithgrief，thathedidnotreflectonthebehaviorofPacquetteandFriarGiroflee，whoneverstayedtoreturnhimthanksforthepresentshehadsogenerouslymadethem。

chapter26CHAPTERXXVI

CANDIDEANDMARTINSUPWITHSIXSHARPERS。WHO

THEYWERE

OneeveningasCandide，withhisattendantMartin，wasgoingtositdowntosupperwithsomeforeignerswholodgedinthesameinnwheretheyhadtakenuptheirquarters，amanwithafacethecolorofsootcamebehindhim，andtakinghimbythearm，said，"Holdyourselfinreadinesstogoalongwithus;besureyoudonotfail。"

Uponthis，turningabouttoseefromwhomthesewordscame，hebeheldCacambo。NothingbutthesightofMissCunegondecouldhavegivenhimgreaterjoyandsurprise。Hewasalmostbesidehimself，andembracedthisdearfriend。

"Cunegonde！"saidhe，"Cunegondeiscomewithyoudoubtless！

Where，whereisshe？Carrymetoherthisinstant，thatImaydiewithjoyinherpresence。"

"Cunegondeisnothere"，answeredCacambo;"sheisinConstantinople。"

"Goodheavens！inConstantinople！butnomatterifshewereinChina，I

wouldflythither。Quick，quick，dearCacambo，letusbegone。"

"Softandfair"，saidCacambo，"staytillyouhavesupped。

Icannotatpresentstaytosayanythingmoretoyou;Iamaslave，andmymasterwaitsforme;Imustgoandattendhimattable：butmum！saynotaword，onlygetyoursupper，andholdyourselfinreadiness。"

Candide，dividedbetweenjoyandgrief，charmedtohavethusmetwithhisfaithfulagentagain，andsurprisedtohearhewasaslave，hisheartpalpitating，hissensesconfused，butfullofthehopesofrecoveringhisdearCunegonde，satdowntotablewithMartin，whobeheldallthesesceneswithgreatunconcern，andwithsixstrangers，whohadcometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。

Cacambowaitedattableupononeofthosestrangers。Whensupperwasnearlyover，hedrewneartohismaster，andwhisperedinhisear：

"Sire，YourMajestymaygowhenyouplease;theshipisready";andsosayinghelefttheroom。

Theguests，surprisedatwhattheyhadheard，lookedateachotherwithoutspeakingaword;whenanotherservantdrawingneartohismaster，inlikemannersaid，"Sire，YourMajesty’spost-chaiseisatPadua，andthebarkisready。"Themastermadehimasign，andheinstantlywithdrew。

Thecompanyallstaredateachotheragain，andthegeneralastonishmentwasincreased。Athirdservantthenapproachedanotherofthestrangers，andsaid，"Sire，ifYourMajestywillbeadvisedbyme，youwillnotmakeanylongerstayinthisplace;Iwillgoandgeteverythingready";andinstantlydisappeared。

CandideandMartinthentookitforgrantedthatthiswassomeofthediversionsoftheCarnival，andthatthesewerecharactersinmasquerade。

Thenafourthdomesticsaidtothefourthstranger，"YourMajestymaysetoffwhenyouplease";sayingwhich，hewentawayliketherest。Afifthvaletsaidthesametoafifthmaster。Butthesixthdomesticspokeinadifferentstyletothepersononwhomhewaited，andwhosatneartoCandide。

"Troth，sir"，saidhe，"theywilltrustYourMajestynolonger，normyselfneither;andwemaybothofuschancetobesenttojailthisverynight;andthereforeIshalltakecareofmyself，andsoadieu。"

Theservantsbeingallgone，thesixstrangers，withCandideandMartin，remainedinaprofoundsilence。AtlengthCandidebrokeitbysaying：

"Gentlemen，thisisaverysingularjokeuponmyword;

howcameyoualltobekings？FormypartIownfrankly，thatneithermyfriendMartinhere，normyself，haveanyclaimtoroyalty。"

Cacambo’smasterthenbegan，withgreatgravity，todeliverhimselfthusinItalian：

"Iamnotjokingintheleast，mynameisAchmetIII。I

wasGrandSultanformanyyears;Idethronedmybrother，mynephewdethronedme，myvizierslosttheirheads，andIamcondemnedtoendmydaysintheoldseraglio。

Mynephew，theGrandSultanMahomet，givesmepermissiontotravelsometimesformyhealth，andIamcometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。"

AyoungmanwhosatbyAchmet，spokenext，andsaid：

"MynameisIvan。IwasonceEmperorofalltheRussians，butwasdethronedinmycradle。Myparentswereconfined，andIwasbroughtupinaprison，yetIamsometimesallowedtotravel，thoughalwayswithpersonstokeepaguardoverme，andIcometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。"

Thethirdsaid：

"IamCharlesEdward，KingofEngland;myfatherhasrenouncedhisrighttothethroneinmyfavor。Ihavefoughtindefenseofmyrights，andnearathousandofmyfriendshavehadtheirheartstakenoutoftheirbodiesaliveandthrownintheirfaces。Ihavemyselfbeenconfinedinaprison。IamgoingtoRometovisittheKing，myfather，whowasdethronedaswellasmyself;andmygrandfatherandIhavecometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。"

Thefourthspokethus：

"IamtheKingofPoland;thefortuneofwarhasstrippedmeofmyhereditarydominions。Myfatherexperiencedthesamevicissitudesoffate。I

resignmyselftothewillofProvidence，inthesamemannerasSultanAchmet，theEmperorIvan，andKingCharlesEdward，whomGodlongpreserve;andIhavecometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。"

Thefifthsaid：

"IamKingofPolandalso。Ihavetwicelostmykingdom;

butProvidencehasgivenmeotherdominions，whereIhavedonemoregoodthanalltheSarmatiankingsputtogetherwereeverabletodoonthebanksoftheVistula;IresignmyselflikewisetoProvidence;andhavecometospendtheCarnivalatVenice。"

Itnowcametothesixthmonarch’sturntospeak。"Gentlemen"，saidhe，"I

amnotsogreataprinceastherestofyou，itistrue，butIam，however，acrownedhead。IamTheodore，electedKingofCorsica。

IhavehadthetitleofMajesty，andamnowhardlytreatedwithcommoncivility。

Ihavecoinedmoney，andamnotnowworthasingleducat。Ihavehadtwosecretaries，andamnowwithoutavalet。Iwasonceseatedonathrone，andsincethathavelainuponatrussofstraw，inacommonjailinLondon，andIverymuchfearIshallmeetwiththesamefatehereinVenice，whereIcame，likeYourMajesties，todivertmyselfattheCarnival。"

TheotherfiveKingslistenedtothisspeechwithgreatattention;itexcitedtheircompassion;eachofthemmadetheunhappyTheodoreapresentoftwentysequins，andCandidegavehimadiamond，worthjustahundredtimesthatsum。

"Whocanthisprivatepersonbe"，saidthefiveKingstooneanother，"whoisabletogive，andhasactuallygiven，ahundredtimesasmuchasanyofus？"

Justastheyrosefromtable，incamefourSereneHighnesses，whohadalsobeenstrippedoftheirterritoriesbythefortuneofwar，andhadcometospendtheremainderoftheCarnivalatVenice。Candidetooknomannerofnoticeofthem;forhisthoughtswerewhollyemployedonhisvoyagetoConstantinople，whereheintendedtogoinsearchofhislovelyMissCunegonde。

chapter27CHAPTERXXVII

CANDIDE’S

VOYAGETOCONSTANTINOPLE

ThetrustyCacambohadalreadyengagedthecaptainoftheTurkishshipthatwastocarrySultanAchmetbacktoConstantinopletotakeCandideandMartinonboard。Accordinglytheybothembarked，afterpayingtheirobeisancetohismiserableHighness。Astheyweregoingonboard，CandidesaidtoMartin：

"YouseewesuppedincompanywithsixdethronedKings，andtooneofthemIgavecharity。Perhapstheremaybeagreatmanyotherprincesstillmoreunfortunate。FormypartIhavelostonlyahundredsheep，andamnowgoingtoflytothearmsofmycharmingMissCunegonde。

MydearMartin，Imustinsistonit，thatPanglosswasintheright。Allisforthebest。"

"Iwishitmaybe"，saidMartin。

"ButthiswasanoddadventurewemetwithatVenice。I

donotthinkthereeverwasaninstancebeforeofsixdethronedmonarchssuppingtogetheratapublicinn。"

"Thisisnotmoreextraordinary"，saidMartin，"thanmostofwhathashappenedtous。Itisaverycommonthingforkingstobedethroned;andasforourhavingthehonortosupwithsixofthem，itisamereaccident，notdeservingourattention。"

AssoonasCandidesethisfootonboardthevessel，heflewtohisoldfriendandvaletCacamboand，throwinghisarmsabouthisneck，embracedhimwithtransportsofjoy。

"Well"，saidhe，"whatnewsofMissCunegonde？Doesshestillcontinuetheparagonofbeauty？Doesshelovemestill？Howdoesshedo？Youhave，doubtless，purchasedasuperbpalaceforheratConstantinople。"

"Mydearmaster"，repliedCacambo，"MissCunegondewashesdishesonthebanksofthePropontis，inthehouseofaprincewhohasveryfewtowash。SheisatpresentaslaveinthefamilyofanancientsovereignnamedRagotsky，whomtheGrandTurkallowsthreecrownsadaytomaintainhiminhisexile;butthemostmelancholycircumstanceofallis，thatsheisturnedhorriblyugly。"

"Uglyorhandsome"，saidCandide，"Iamamanofhonorand，assuch，amobligedtoloveherstill。Buthowcouldshepossiblyhavebeenreducedtosoabjectacondition，whenIsentfiveorsixmillionstoherbyyou？"

"Lordblessme"，saidCacambo，"wasnotIobligedtogivetwomillionstoSeignorDonFernandod’IbaraayFigueorayMascarenesyLampourdosySouza，theGovernorofBuenosAyres，forlibertytotakeMissCunegondeawaywithme？Andthendidnotabravefellowofapirategallantlystripusofalltherest？AndthendidnotthissamepiratecarryuswithhimtoCapeMatapan，toMilo，toNicaria，toSamos，toPetra，totheDardanelles，toMarmora，toScutari？MissCunegondeandtheoldwomanarenowservantstotheprinceIhavetoldyouof;andImyselfamslavetothedethronedSultan。"

"Whatachainofshockingaccidents！"exclaimedCandide。

"Butafterall，I

havestillsomediamondsleft，withwhichIcaneasilyprocureMissCunegonde’sliberty。Itisapitythoughsheisgrownsougly。"

ThenturningtoMartin，"Whatthinkyou，friend"，saidhe，"whoseconditionismosttobepitied，theEmperorAchmet’s，theEmperorIvan’s，KingCharlesEdward’s，ormine？"

"Faith，Icannotresolveyourquestion"，saidMartin，"unlessIhadbeeninthebreastsofyouall。"

"Ah！"criedCandide，"wasPanglossherenow，hewouldhaveknown，andsatisfiedmeatonce。"

"Iknownot"，saidMartin，"inwhatbalanceyourPanglosscouldhaveweighedthemisfortunesofmankind，andhavesetajustestimationontheirsufferings。AllthatIpretendtoknowofthematteristhattherearemillionsofmenontheearth，whoseconditionsareahundredtimesmorepitiablethanthoseofKingCharlesEdward，theEmperorIvan，orSultanAchmet。"

"Why，thatmaybe"，answeredCandide。

InafewdaystheyreachedtheBosphorus;andthefirstthingCandidedidwastopayahighransomforCacambo;then，withoutlosingtime，heandhiscompanionswentonboardagalley，inordertosearchforhisCunegondeonthebanksofthePropontis，notwithstandingshewasgrownsougly。

Thereweretwoslavesamongthecrewofthegalley，whorowedveryill，andtowhosebarebacksthemasterofthevesselfrequentlyappliedalash。

Candide，fromnaturalsympathy，lookedatthesetwoslavesmoreattentivelythanatanyoftherest，anddrewnearthemwithaneyeofpity。Theirfeatures，thoughgreatlydisfigured，appearedtohimtobearastrongresemblancewiththoseofPanglossandtheunhappyBaronJesuit，MissCunegonde’sbrother。Thisideaaffectedhimwithgriefandcompassion：heexaminedthemmoreattentivelythanbefore。

"Introth"，saidhe，turningtoMartin，"ifIhadnotseenmymasterPanglossfairlyhanged，andhadnotmyselfbeenunluckyenoughtoruntheBaronthroughthebody，Ishouldabsolutelythinkthosetworowerswerethemen。"

NosoonerhadCandideutteredthenamesoftheBaronandPangloss，thanthetwoslavesgaveagreatcry，ceasedrowing，andletfalltheiroarsoutoftheirhands。Themasterofthevessel，seeingthis，ranuptothem，andredoubledthedisciplineofthelash。

"Hold，hold"，criedCandide，"Iwillgiveyouwhatmoneyyoushallaskforthesetwopersons。"

"Goodheavens！itisCandide"，saidoneofthemen。

"Candide！"criedtheother。

"DoIdream"，saidCandide，"oramIawake？AmIactuallyonboardthisgalley？IsthisMyLordtheBaron，whomIkilled？andthatmymasterPangloss，whomIsawhangedbeforemyface？"

"ItisI！itisI！"criedtheybothtogether。

"What！isthisyourgreatphilosopher？"saidMartin。

"Mydearsir"，saidCandidetothemasterofthegalley，"howmuchdoyouaskfortheransomoftheBaronofThunder-ten-tronckh，whoisoneofthefirstbaronsoftheempire，andofMonsieurPangloss，themostprofoundmetaphysicianinGermany？"

"Why，then，Christiancur"，repliedtheTurkishcaptain，"sincethesetwodogsofChristianslavesarebaronsandmetaphysicians，whonodoubtareofhighrankintheirowncountry，thoushaltgivemefiftythousandsequins。"

"Youshallhavethem，sir;carrymebackasquickasthoughttoConstantinople，andyoushallreceivethemoneyimmediately-No！

carrymefirsttoMissCunegonde。"

Thecaptain，uponCandide’sfirstproposal，hadalreadytackedabout，andhemadethecrewplytheiroarssoeffectually，thatthevesselflewthroughthewater，quickerthanabirdcleavestheair。

CandidebestowedathousandembracesontheBaronandPangloss。

"Andsothen，mydearBaron，Ididnotkillyou？andyou，mydearPangloss，arecometolifeagainafteryourhanging？ButhowcameyouslavesonboardaTurkishgalley？"

"Andisittruethatmydearsisterisinthiscountry？"

saidtheBaron。

"Yes"，saidCacambo。

"AnddoIonceagainbeholdmydearCandide？"saidPangloss。

CandidepresentedMartinandCacambotothem;theyembracedeachother，andallspoketogether。Thegalleyflewlikelightning，andsoontheyweregotbacktoport。CandideinstantlysentforaJew，towhomhesoldforfiftythousandsequinsadiamondrichlyworthonehundredthousand，thoughthefellowsworetohimallthetimebyFatherAbrahamthathegavehimthemosthecouldpossiblyafford。Henosoonergotthemoneyintohishands，thanhepaiditdownfortheransomoftheBaronandPangloss。Thelatterflunghimselfatthefeetofhisdeliverer，andbathedhimwithhistears;

theformerthankedhimwithagraciousnod，andpromisedtoreturnhimthemoneythefirstopportunity。

"Butisitpossible"，saidhe，"thatmysistershouldbeinTurkey？"

"Nothingismorepossible"，answeredCacambo，"forshescoursthedishesinthehouseofaTransylvanianprince。"

CandidesentdirectlyfortwoJews，andsoldmorediamondstothem;andthenhesetoutwithhiscompanionsinanothergalley，todeliverMissCunegondefromslavery。

chapter28CHAPTERXXVIII

WHATBEFELLCANDIDE，CUNEGONDE，PANGLOSS，MARTIN，ETC。

Pardon"，saidCandidetotheBaron;"oncemoreletmeentreatyourpardon，ReverendFather，forrunningyouthroughthebody。"

"Saynomoreaboutit"，repliedtheBaron。"IwasalittletoohastyImustown;butasyouseemtobedesiroustoknowbywhataccidentIcametobeaslaveonboardthegalleywhereyousawme，Iwillinformyou。AfterIhadbeencuredofthewoundyougaveme，bytheCollegeapothecary，IwasattackedandcarriedoffbyapartyofSpanishtroops，whoclappedmeinprisoninBuenosAyres，attheverytimemysisterwassettingoutfromthere。IaskedleavetoreturntoRome，tothegeneralofmyOrder，whoappointedmechaplaintotheFrenchAmbassadoratConstantinople。

Ihadnotbeenaweekinmynewoffice，whenIhappenedtomeetoneeveningayoungIcoglan，extremelyhandsomeandwell-made。Theweatherwasveryhot;theyoungmanhadaninclinationtobathe。Itooktheopportunitytobathelikewise。IdidnotknowitwasacrimeforaChristiantobefoundnakedincompanywithayoungTurk。Acadiorderedmetoreceiveahundredblowsonthesolesofmyfeet，andsentmetothegalleys。Idonotbelievethattherewaseveranactofmoreflagrantinjustice。

ButIwouldfainknowhowmysistercametobeasculliontoaTransylvanianprince，whohastakenrefugeamongtheTurks？"

"ButhowhappensitthatIbeholdyouagain，mydearPangloss？"

saidCandide。

"Itistrue"，answeredPangloss，"yousawmehanged，thoughIoughtproperlytohavebeenburned;butyoumayremember，thatitrainedextremelyhardwhentheyweregoingtoroastme。Thestormwassoviolentthattheyfounditimpossibletolightthefire;sotheyhangedmebecausetheycoulddonobetter。Asurgeonpurchasedmybody，carriedithome，andpreparedtodissectme。Hebeganbymakingacrucialincisionfrommynaveltotheclavicle。ItisimpossibleforanyonetohavebeenmorelamelyhangedthanIhadbeen。Theexecutionerwasasubdeacon，andknewhowtoburnpeopleverywell，butasforhanging，hewasanoviceatit，beingquiteoutofpractice;thecordbeingwet，andnotslippingproperly，thenoosedidnotjoin。Inshort，Istillcontinuedtobreathe;

thecrucialincisionmademescreamtosuchadegree，thatmysurgeonfellflatuponhisback;

andimaginingitwastheDevilhewasdissecting，ranaway，andinhisfrighttumbleddownstairs。Hiswifehearingthenoise，flewfromthenextroom，andseeingmestretcheduponthetablewithmycrucialincision，wasstillmoreterrifiedthanherhusband，andfelluponhim。Whentheyhadalittlerecoveredthemselves，Iheardhersaytoherhusband，’Mydear，howcouldyouthinkofdissectingaheretic？Don’tyouknowthattheDevilisalwaysinthem？I’llrundirectlytoapriesttocomeanddrivetheevilspiritout。’I

trembledfromheadtofootathearinghertalkinthismanner，andexertedwhatlittlestrengthIhadlefttocryout，’Havemercyonme！’AtlengththePortuguesebarbertookcourage，sewedupmywound，andhiswifenursedme;andIwasuponmylegsinafortnight’stime。ThebarbergotmeaplacetobelackeytoaKnightofMalta，whowasgoingtoVenice;

butfindingmymasterhadnomoneytopaymemywages，IenteredintotheserviceofaVenetianmerchantandwentwithhimtoConstantinople。

"OnedayIhappenedtoenteramosque，whereIsawnoonebutanoldmanandaveryprettyyoungfemaledevotee，whowastellingherbeads;herneckwasquitebare，andinherbosomshehadabeautifulnosegayoftulips，roses，anemones，ranunculuses，hyacinths，andauriculas;sheletfallhernosegay。Iranimmediatelytotakeitup，andpresentedittoherwithamostrespectfulbow。Iwassolongindeliveringitthatthemanbegantobeangry;and，perceivingIwasaChristian，hecriedoutforhelp;theycarriedmebeforethecadi，whoorderedmetoreceiveonehundredbastinadoes，andsentmetothegalleys。IwaschainedintheverygalleyandtotheverysamebenchwiththeBaron。OnboardthisgalleytherewerefouryoungmenbelongingtoMarseilles，fiveNeapolitanpriests，andtwomonksofCorfu，whotoldusthatthelikeadventureshappenedeveryday。TheBaronpretendedthathehadbeenworseusedthanmyself;andIinsistedthattherewasfarlessharmintakingupanosegay，andputtingitintoawoman’sbosom，thantobefoundstarknakedwithayoungIcoglan。Wewerecontinuallywhipped，andreceivedtwentylashesadaywithaheavythong，whentheconcatenationofsublunaryeventsbroughtyouonboardourgalleytoransomusfromslavery。"

"Well，mydearPangloss"，saidCandidetohim，"whenYouwerehanged，dissected，whipped，andtuggingattheoar，didyoucontinuetothinkthateverythinginthisworldhappensforthebest？"

"Ihavealwaysabidedbymyfirstopinion"，answeredPangloss;

"for，afterall，Iamaphilosopher，anditwouldnotbecomemetoretractmysentiments;especiallyasLeibnitzcouldnotbeinthewrong：andthatpreestablishedharmonyisthefinestthingintheworld，aswellasaplenumandthemateriasubtilis。"

chapter29CHAPTERXXIX

INWHATMANNERCANDIDEFOUNDMISSCUNEGONDE

ANDTHEOLDWOMANAGAIN

WhileCandide，theBaron，Pangloss，Martin，andCacambo，wererelatingtheirseveraladventures，andreasoningonthecontingentornoncontingenteventsofthisworld;oncausesandeffects;onmoralandphysicalevil;onfreewillandnecessity;andontheconsolationthatmaybefeltbyapersonwhenaslaveandchainedtoanoarinaTurkishgalley，theyarrivedatthehouseoftheTransylvanianprinceontheshoresofthePropontis。Thefirstobjectstheybeheldthere，wereMissCunegondeandtheoldwoman，whowerehangingsometableclothsonalinetodry。

TheBaronturnedpaleatthesight。EventhetenderCandide，thataffectionatelover，uponseeinghisfairCunegondeallsunburned，withblearyeyes，awitheredneck，wrinkledfaceandarms，allcoveredwitharedscurf，startedbackwithhorror;but，notwithstanding，recoveringhimself，headvancedtowardsheroutofgoodmanners。SheembracedCandideandherbrother;theyembracedtheoldwoman，andCandideransomedthemboth。

TherewasasmallfarmintheneighborhoodwhichtheoldwomanproposedtoCandidetomakeshiftwithtillthecompanyshouldmeetwithamorefavorabledestiny。Cunegonde，notknowingthatshewasgrownugly，asnoonehadinformedherofit，remindedCandideofhispromiseinsoperemptoryamanner，thatthesimpleladdidnotdaretorefuseher;hethenacquaintedtheBaronthathewasgoingtomarryhissister。

"Iwillneversuffer"，saidtheBaron，"mysistertobeguiltyofanactionsoderogatorytoherbirthandfamily;norwillIbearthisinsolenceonyourpart。No，IneverwillbereproachedthatmynephewsarenotqualifiedforthefirstecclesiasticaldignitiesinGermany;norshallasisterofmineeverbethewifeofanypersonbelowtherankofBaronoftheEmpire。"

Cunegondeflungherselfatherbrother’sfeet，andbedewedthemwithhertears;buthestillcontinuedinflexible。

"Thoufoolishfellow，saidCandide，"haveInotdeliveredtheefromthegalleys，paidthyransom，andthysister’s，too，whowasascullion，andisveryugly，andyetcondescendtomarryher？andshaltthoupretendtoopposethematch！IfIweretolistenonlytothedictatesofmyanger，I

shouldkilltheeagain。"

"Thoumayestkillmeagain"，saidtheBaron;"butthoushaltnotmarrymysisterwhileIamliving。"

chapter30CHAPTERXXX

CONCLUSION

Candidehad，intruth，nogreatinclinationtomarryMissCunegonde;buttheextremeimpertinenceoftheBarondeterminedhimtoconcludethematch;

andCunegondepressedhimsowarmly，thathecouldnotrecant。HeconsultedPangloss，Martin，andthefaithfulCacambo。

Panglosscomposedafinememorial，bywhichheprovedthattheBaronhadnorightoverhissister;andthatshemight，accordingtoallthelawsoftheEmpire，marryCandidewiththelefthand。MartinconcludedtothrowtheBaronintothesea;CacambodecidedthathemustbedeliveredtotheTurkishcaptainandsenttothegalleys;afterwhichheshouldbeconveyedbythefirstshiptotheFatherGeneralatRome。Thisadvicewasfoundtobegood;theoldwomanapprovedofit，andnotasyllablewassaidtohissister;thebusinesswasexecutedforalittlemoney;andtheyhadthepleasureoftrickingaJesuit，andpunishingtheprideofaGermanbaron。

Itwasaltogethernaturaltoimagine，thatafterundergoingsomanydisasters，Candide，marriedtohismistressandlivingwiththephilosopherPangloss，thephilosopherMartin，theprudentCacambo，andtheoldwoman，havingbesidesbroughthomesomanydiamondsfromthecountryoftheancientIncas，wouldleadthemostagreeablelifeintheworld。ButhehadbeensorobbedbytheJews，thathehadnothingleftbuthislittlefarm;

hiswife，everydaygrowingmoreandmoreugly，becameheadstrongandinsupportable;theoldwomanwasinfirm，andmoreill-naturedyetthanCunegonde。Cacambo，whoworkedinthegarden，andcarriedtheproduceofittosellinConstantinople，wasabovehislabor，andcursedhisfate。

PanglossdespairedofmakingafigureinanyoftheGermanuniversities。

AndastoMartin，hewasfirmlypersuadedthatapersonisequallyill-situatedeverywhere。Hetookthingswithpatience。

Candide，Martin，andPanglossdisputedsometimesaboutmetaphysicsandmorality。Boatswereoftenseenpassingunderthewindowsofthefarmladenwitheffendis，bashaws，andcadis，thatweregoingintobanishmenttoLemnos，MytileneandErzerum。Andothercadis，bashaws，andeffendiswereseencomingbacktosucceedtheplaceoftheexiles，andweredrivenoutintheirturns。Theysawseveralheadscuriouslystuckuponpoles，andcarriedaspresentstotheSublimePorte。Suchsightsgaveoccasiontofrequentdissertations;andwhennodisputeswereinprogress，theirksomenesswassoexcessivethattheoldwomanventuredonedaytotellthem：

"Iwouldbegladtoknowwhichisworst，toberavishedahundredtimesbyNegropirates，tohaveonebuttockcutoff，torunthegauntletamongtheBulgarians，tobewhippedandhangedatanauto-da-fe，tobedissected，tobechainedtoanoarinagalley;and，inshort，toexperienceallthemiseriesthroughwhicheveryoneofushathpassed，ortoremainheredoingnothing？"

"This"，saidCandide，"isagrandquestion。"

Thisdiscoursegavebirthtonewreflections，andMartinespeciallyconcludedthatmanwasborntoliveintheconvulsionsofdisquiet，orinthelethargyofidleness。ThoughCandidedidnotabsolutelyagreetothis，yethedidnotdetermineanythingonthathead。Panglossavowedthathehadundergonedreadfulsufferings;buthavingoncemaintainedthateverythingwentonaswellaspossible，hestillmaintainedit，andatthesametimebelievednothingofit。

TherewasonethingwhichmorethaneverconfirmedMartininhisdetestableprinciples，madeCandidehesitate，andembarrassedPangloss，whichwasthearrivalofPacquetteandBrotherGirofleeonedayattheirfarm。Thiscouplehadbeenintheutmostdistress;theyhadveryspeedilymadeawaywiththeirthreethousandpiastres;theyhadparted，beenreconciled;quarreledagain，beenthrownintoprison;

hadmadetheirescape，andatlastBrotherGirofleehadturnedTurk。

Pacquettestillcontinuedtofollowhertrade;butshegotlittleornothingbyit。

"Iforesawverywell"，saidMartintoCandide"thatyourpresentswouldsoonbesquandered，andonlymakethemmoremiserable。YouandCacambohavespentmillionsofpiastres，andyetyouarenotmorehappythanBrotherGirofleeandPacquette。"

"Ah！"saidPanglosstoPacquette，"itisHeaventhathasbroughtyouhereamongus，mypoorchild！Doyouknowthatyouhavecostmethetipofmynose，oneeye，andoneear？Whatahandsomeshapeishere！

andwhatisthisworld！"

Thisnewadventureengagedthemmoredeeplythaneverinphilosophicaldisputations。

IntheneighborhoodlivedafamousdervishwhopassedforthebestphilosopherinTurkey;theywenttoconsulthim：Pangloss，whowastheirspokesman，addressedhimthus：

"Master，wecometoentreatyoutotelluswhysostrangeananimalasmanhasbeenformed？"

"Whydoyoutroubleyourheadaboutit？"saidthedervish;

"isitanybusinessofyours？"

"But，ReverendFather"，saidCandide，"thereisahorribledealofevilontheearth。"

"Whatsignifiesit"，saidthedervish，"whetherthereisevilorgood？WhenHisHighnesssendsashiptoEgyptdoeshetroublehisheadwhethertheratsinthevesselareattheireaseornot？"

"Whatmustthenbedone？"saidPangloss。

"Besilent"，answeredthedervish。

"Iflatteredmyself"，repliedPangloss，"tohavereasonedalittlewithyouonthecausesandeffects，onthebestofpossibleworlds，theoriginofevil，thenatureofthesoul，andapre-establishedharmony。"

Atthesewordsthedervishshutthedoorintheirfaces。

Duringthisconversation，newswasspreadabroadthattwoviziersofthebenchandthemuftihadjustbeenstrangledatConstantinople，andseveraloftheirfriendsimpaled。Thiscatastrophemadeagreatnoiseforsomehours。Pangloss，Candide，andMartin，astheywerereturningtothelittlefarm，metwithagood-lookingoldman，whowastakingtheairathisdoor，underanalcoveformedoftheboughsoforangetrees。

Pangloss，whowasasinquisitiveashewasdisputative，askedhimwhatwasthenameofthemuftiwhowaslatelystrangled。

"Icannottell"，answeredthegoodoldman;"Ineverknewthenameofanymufti，orvizierbreathing。Iamentirelyignorantoftheeventyouspeakof;I

presumethatingeneralsuchasareconcernedinpublicaffairssometimescometoamiserableend;andthattheydeserveit：butIneverinquirewhatisdoingatConstantinople;Iamcontentedwithsendingthithertheproduceofmygarden，whichIcultivatewithmyownhands。"

Aftersayingthesewords，heinvitedthestrangerstocomeintohishouse。

Histwodaughtersandtwosonspresentedthemwithdiverssortsofsherbetoftheirownmaking;besidescaymac，heightenedwiththepeelsofcandiedcitrons，oranges，lemons，pineapples，pistachionuts，andMochacoffeeunadulteratedwiththebadcoffeeofBataviaortheAmericanislands。AfterwhichthetwodaughtersofthisgoodMussulmanperfumedthebeardsofCandide，Pangloss，andMartin。

"Youmustcertainlyhaveavastestate"，saidCandidetotheTurk。

"Ihavenomorethantwentyacresofground"，hereplied，"thewholeofwhichIcultivatemyselfwiththehelpofmychildren;

andourlaborkeepsofffromusthreegreatevils-idleness，vice，andwant。"

Candide，ashewasreturninghome，madeprofoundreflectionsontheTurk’sdiscourse。

"Thisgoodoldman"，saidhetoPanglossandMartin，"appearstometohavechosenforhimselfalotmuchpreferabletothatofthesixKingswithwhomwehadthehonortosup。"

"Humangrandeur"，saidPangloss，"isverydangerous，ifwebelievethetestimoniesofalmostallphilosophers;forwefindEglon，KingofMoab，wasassassinatedbyAod;Absalomwashangedbythehairofhishead，andrunthroughwiththreedarts;KingNadab，sonofJeroboam，wasslainbyBaaza;KingElabyZimri;OkosiasbyJehu;AthaliahbyJehoiada;theKingsJehooiakim，Jeconiah，andZedekiah，wereledintocaptivity：IneednottellyouwhatwasthefateofCroesus，Astyages，Darius，DionysiusofSyracuse，Pyrrhus，Perseus，Hannibal，Jugurtha，Ariovistus，Caesar，Pompey，Nero，Otho，Vitellius，Domitian，RichardIIofEngland，EdwardII，HenryVI，RichardIll，MaryStuart，CharlesI，thethreeHenrysofFrance，andtheEmperorHenryIV。"

"Neitherneedyoutellme"，saidCandide，"thatwemusttakecareofourgarden。"

"Youareintheright"，saidPangloss;"forwhenmanwasputintothegardenofEden，itwaswithanintenttodressit;andthisprovesthatmanwasnotborntobeidle。"

"Workthenwithoutdisputing"，saidMartin;"itistheonlywaytorenderlifesupportable。"

Thelittlesociety，oneandall，enteredintothislaudabledesignandsetthemselvestoexerttheirdifferenttalents。Thelittlepieceofgroundyieldedthemaplentifulcrop。Cunegondeindeedwasveryugly，butshebecameanexcellenthandatpastrywork：Pacquetteembroidered;theoldwomanhadthecareofthelinen。Therewasnone，downtoBrotherGiroflee，butdidsomeservice;hewasaverygoodcarpenter，andbecameanhonestman。

PanglossusednowandthentosaytoCandide：

"Thereisaconcatenationofalleventsinthebestofpossibleworlds;for，inshort，hadyounotbeenkickedoutofafinecastlefortheloveofMissCunegonde;hadyounotbeenputintotheInquisition;

hadyounottraveledoverAmericaonfoot;hadyounotruntheBaronthroughthebody;andhadyounotlostallyoursheep，whichyoubroughtfromthegoodcountryofElDorado，youwouldnothavebeenheretoeatpreservedcitronsandpistachionuts。"

"Excellentlyobserved"，answeredCandide;"butwemustcultivateourgarden。"